How do you deal with guilt when other people offer you food and you say no?

vannahsanders
vannahsanders Posts: 16 Member
in Challenges
I don't know how common this is, but I have MAJOR guilt when it comes to turning down food people offer me. I don't crave any bad food. My issue lies with the mentality that I hurt someone's feelings if I say "no thank you" to food they made that I'm not allowing myself to eat. I don't know where it comes from or how to deal with it. I'm always very polite, even overly polite, when I turn it down; but I can't help but still feel this overwhelming amount of guilt like I hurt their feelings when I say no to them. Is this a thing? Does anyone else struggle with this? If so, how do you cope or deal with it to where you don't feel so bad?

Replies

  • will_it_go_round_in_circles
    will_it_go_round_in_circles Posts: 985 Member
    It can be a slippery slope. Even when being polite about it and explaining that it doesn't work with you goals it can be taken as insult that "you're better than eating that". I usually just tell them I'm saving room for something mom is making later, but I'll have a bite to humor. Works well most of the time without hurt feelings.
  • debrakgoogins
    debrakgoogins Posts: 2,033 Member
    I just say I’ve already eaten. Would you feel guilty for turning down alcohol when you know you have to drive? If someone offered you drugs and you said no...would you feel bad? You’re just trying to be healthy and take care of yourself. There is no shame in that.
  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
    These mountains that you are carrying, you were only supposed to climb. You can. Therefore you will climb out of this hole. No one has to live in our body. Give yourself permission to say just say 'No, thank you'. If you keep taking food you don't want to eat they won't ever learn your habits.

    Honor yourself and don't do things just to please other people. Especially if they have no intention of returning the favor. <3
  • MadisonMolly2017
    MadisonMolly2017 Posts: 11,152 Member
    I remind myself that 79.1 Americans are obese or overweight.

    I have watched how thinner friends do it.
    “No thank you, I’m full; dinner was delicious!”
    “No dessert for me”
    “I’ll pass for now”
    “No thanks”
    “I’m done, thank you”

    Definitively. And you know, no one ever pushes food on them. 😄
  • deputy_randolph
    deputy_randolph Posts: 940 Member
    I don't experience guilt, b/c I'm usually extremely honest. I've said, "That looks amazing, but I know how I am...if I start eating it, I won't be able to stop. I have a problem with desserts. It's just better that I don't even try it."

    I have gotten funny looks, but there isn't much someone can say to that statement that doesn't make them into the jerk.
  • fitnessjustin01
    fitnessjustin01 Posts: 239 Member
    I don't mind being the boring one. At my age why start to try and fit in lol. I try and be polite but most of the people around me have very different lifestyles.
  • patprince8
    patprince8 Posts: 16 Member
    vannahsanders wrote: »
    I don't know how common this is, but I have MAJOR guilt when it comes to turning down food people offer me. I don't crave any bad food. My issue lies with the mentality that I hurt someone's feelings if I say "no thank you" to food they made that I'm not allowing myself to eat. I don't know where it comes from or how to deal with it. I'm always very polite, even overly polite, when I turn it down; but I can't help but still feel this overwhelming amount of guilt like I hurt their feelings when I say no to them. Is this a thing? Does anyone else struggle with this? If so, how do you cope or deal with it to where you don't feel so bad?

    I say, "Aww, I am so full already... It looks so good! Enjoy!"

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