help please..

add me for support if you like

i have 2 kids as well stay at home mom right now. i have light breakfast and lunch that way i can eat a great meal at dinner with the family...

well, unless HE does the cooking, you should make what YOU think is healthy..in my house i cook, and it's eat what i make, or you don't eat rule..please don't let him hold you back..if he refuses to eat healthier, start making him make his own food..best of luck

No one is forcing you to eat what he eats.

I deal with this on a daily basis, my hubby and I are two peas in a pod, but when it comes to health and nutrition we are polar opposites. So you have a few options. Say either you eat what I eat or cook yourself, make two separate meals, or make two separate meals but alter his to his liking (i.e., add cheese, larger protion size, what have you) <---- This is much less work and typically a great compromise.

It is completely doable, the question is how bad do you want it?

Seems to me that if you are doing the cooking, he eats what you put on the table. If he doesn't like it, he cooks his own dinner...

Ding ding ding.

That's pretty much how it works in our house. My husband eats his pasta and meat sauce and I eat my stir fry.

As for the exercise - take the kids for walks. Sit on the floor and fold laundry and do a few sit ups in between.

Definitely ditch the soda - bad stuff. Drink more water!

Not being able to control yourself sounds like your problem, not your husband. Try to just fix one thing drink water instead of soft drinks......you have to try to take control of something.

I know that there are different dyanmics in different relationships. Some women prefer to be submissive wives, and that is what works best for their families. I'm not using that term in a bad way BTW. Google it. It sounds a lot worse than what it really means. For many it is a choice that has to do with their beliefs. IDK if this is the case with you, OP, but it kind of sounds like it.

ANYWAY...I'd consider myself semi-submissive lol. I feel it is my duty to cook for my husband and family, among other things of course. He also shares this view, but not as extremely as I do. I'm not going to make him something he doesn't like. So most days, I cook one main dish for us all to share, but different side dishes. I eat low carb, and my family loves rice, beans, and platains. So I make them what they want making sure it is portioned correctly, and I'll make my own low carb dish.

If I did not have self-control and will-power, I would fail miserably. That is the only thing that will save you, since it seems like your husband is not very supportive. Add some friends on here for support, but beware of posting in the forums. It's good to find general info and for entertainment, but for the most part, you won't find very friendly or supportive people on here.

Good luck and remember, SELF-CONTROL!

Britt:

It is not about dieting, to make any of these things stick it has to be a lifestyle change, my wife is my rock and she has been there to support me from day one. My honest suggestion is learn how to cook healthier, the food both of you eat can taste good and be good for you and until he gets on board (and trust me someone should kick him in the butt until he gets it!) he does not have to be any wiser to the changes you make! Good luck being a healthy mom is one of the greatest things you can do for your kids.

Britt:

It is not about dieting, to make any of these things stick it has to be a lifestyle change, my wife is my rock and she has been there to support me from day one. My honest suggestion is learn how to cook healthier, the food both of you eat can taste good and be good for you and until he gets on board (and trust me someone should kick him in the butt until he gets it!) he does not have to be any wiser to the changes you make! Good luck being a healthy mom is one of the greatest things you can do for your kids.

Exactly this!

I eat everything my husband does, just not as much. Also, replace ground beef with ground turkey. We use that in everything, he probably wouldn't even notice. Watch your portion sizes, and stop drinking pop. It's easier than you're making it out to be!

My husband and children eat what I cook. I have never cooked separate meals. (There is a current exception to this and I'll mention that below, though.) If my husband truly dislikes a dish that I make (rare), he will let me know and I either take it off my menu rotation or if I really like it, I make it when he's doing something that night and won't be eating at home (also rare). There are concessions I make. For example, I know he dislikes brown rice. I love brown rice and he will eat it even though it's not his favorite. When I make beans and rice (a definite "not fav" dish of his), I'll make it with white rice for him. If I'm doing Chinese or something else with rice, I'll use brown.

He started eating healthier when we married simply because that was how I cooked. When I got pregnant for our first child, I went even healthier and even more so when my kids started eating. Sodas were never kept in the house when my kids were little. He would drink them at work, though. I didn't care. He will now occasionally buy them and bring them in the house, but they are not a temptation for me - I hate soda. One daughter likes it, the other doesn't. The daughter who likes it doesn't like what my husband buys, so she drinks water and OJ. I never bought snack foods. It was (and is) rare for us to have things like ice cream, chips, and candy in the house.

Now, about my "exceptions." I am now vegan (as of two years ago) and my family is not. I will cook a vegan meal one night and a meat meal the next night, adapting a small separate thing for me if I don't have anything left over for that night. I do find that one daughter will prefer to eat vegan with me even on meat nights. I don't cook two separate meals on either night - I might have cheese separately for the others to add to what they are eating (if appropriate).

My husband is now working out of state and now I cook vegan almost every night (with occasional fish/chicken for the girls about twice a week). He is having to cook for himself for the first time in more than 28 years. He is cooking lean meats, fish, and chicken and is eating lots of veggies that before he married me he wouldn't have ever touched.

My suggestion would be to get all of the things that tempt you out of the house. You can tell him he can have them at work or when he's away from the home, but you need the temptation out of reach. I know I do - if I have a box of vegan oreos in the house, I'll eat them. If I don't want the temptation, I don't buy them. They call my name. I can hear them. Try cooking old favorites in a healthier way (whole grain or multigrain pasta for regular, adding more veggies to your meals, lower fat meats and dairy items, etc) and have one night designated for new recipes. Make sure your new recipe is a super healthy one, but one that doesn't skimp on flavor.

We started eating less meat years ago and I did it by incorporating one meatless meal a week into our menu at first, then two, then started using more "meat as ingredients" dishes rather than meat being the star of the plate and surrounded by a token carb and veggie. I added a lot more veggies. Then I added fish one day a week, then two. So before I went vegan, we were only eating red meat one day a week. By slowly transitioning my family over to a new way of eating, there were no protests. And the healthier meals have now become their favorites. I've even had an effect on non-family members. One of my girls' boyfriend (an ardent carnivore) requested my vegan chili the other day. :happy: