Back on the Roller Coaster

So in 2017 - 2018, I dropped from 280 lbs. down to 195 lbs.. To be very frank, a lot of it was related to stress where I wouldn't be hungry at all but I ran with it. I stayed active, made better food choices overall, and kept disciplined. Fast forward to now, I'm back up to 285. 50 lbs. at least has been put on this year alone. A lot of the beginning weight was from drinking my calories, but then that soon went to eating, then eating in excess, then eating terribly. Two of my family members have had great results with getting a gastric bypass and a mini-sleeve, but that is not an option for me with insurance not covering those...so this is on me to fix without medical assistance.

I don't want my kids to feel ashamed over me. I hear how in-laws talk about me, I hear how some in our group of friends talk about me...and as angry and hurt as I get at them for it, I understand that it's my choices that put me back here again. I miss feeling confident like I was. I miss the compliments versus the hurtful words I hear nowadays. But it really is all in my control and if it bugs me so damn much, time to do something about it!

37/Male/Texas/6'1" @ 285 lbs.

I'm using MyFitnessPal to track calories like I did before. I'm going to be using Huel Black to help keep tracking calories easy for the first part. Two of my meals will come from there a day along with a smart dinner at night, and potentially a snack during the day depending on what the planned calories for dinner look like. It's a bit slim fastish, yeah, but it is convenient, and easy to track until I get strict on myself again. I'm about to start traveling for work again pretty consistently, so will be doing body weight training along with jogging so I can keep up my routine anywhere I am. I know me. I know if I have an excuse to not do the work today, I will find an excuse tomorrow and will end up stopping...so I need to make it easy to be able to perform wherever I am or risk it all falling apart.

That's about it for now...good luck to everyone regardless what stage of the journey you are in. I'm ready to make a lasting change, and it all starts today!