can i just complain for a quick moment?

slickmickey
slickmickey Posts: 113 Member
in Motivation and Support
so, a week ago, my husband got news about his health and he immediately proclaimed we're going back on our diets. we did this whole thing 6 years ago, and over the course of a year i lost 40lbs, i think he lost close to 100. then he had a heart attack and said screw it. fast forward 5 years, i've gained back 60, i have no idea how much he's gained, but he found out he is diabetic, has high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and his triglycerides are thru the roof. so, yes it sucks his health has declined, but i was thankful he's back to trying because i cannot do it with him (seriously, i cant cook, he does it all).

so it's been a week. how the everlovinghell has he lost 23lbs as of this morning, while i've only done measly 2.5? i know mine is mostly water, but a person cant really lose 20+ in a week right????? how is it so much easier for guys? i know he's bigger than me, but come on!?

Replies

  • forestfreek
    forestfreek Posts: 5,770 Member
    Sorry you’re feeling frustrated....💕

    I don’t know how 23 pounds in a week is healthy nor possible.....
    Yikes.
    Keep doing YOU and don’t worry about his progress. You’re doing great😊
  • AliNouveau
    AliNouveau Posts: 36,287 Member
    Ugh it's so unfair isn't it!

    I think sometimes diabetics drop a lot of weight because of part of the disease. I know a relative did.

    As Forest said just keep doing you. You'll get there and slow and steady is really the best way to go
  • nanastaci2020
    nanastaci2020 Posts: 1,072 Member
    Because men are lousy.

    They tend to weigh more and have more muscles so they burn more without even trying. I can have a super active day and still not burn what Hubs does on a lazy day.

    Congrats to you both for getting started. I fear that my Hubs is going to have a heart attack or develop other obesity related complications if he doesn't wake up soon. He knows his back issues and poor sleep patterns would improve with weight loss. He has lost before, so knows the ins and outs of it. He is now at his all time high i think. Bmi 35 and needs to lose 35 just to go from obese to overweight. And of course he has to take the first step...
  • springlering62
    springlering62 Posts: 8,480 Member
    I feel ya @nanastaci2020

    All we can do is try to set a good example. i feed him healthy meals, same as what I eat.

    I can’t figure out how he’s putting on weight, and he’s very defensive if I say anything. He put up with my weight for years so I can’t say anything. I figure he’s like a squirrel. One of these days some secret spot in the wall is going to burst and all his “nuts” will come pouring out.
  • nanastaci2020
    nanastaci2020 Posts: 1,072 Member
    There is no doubt as to the why for Hubs. He is very much routine oriented. And his current routine has him sitting in his car for work or sitting on the couch or in bed watching tv when not at work. And eating more calories than he needs most days, because he goes all day without eating (it does not fit into his routine) and then is very hungry (surprise!) and eats too much at night. I'm not saying eating at night is bad, but the amount he eats is too much and then that contributes to his sleeping issues. (Heart burn.)

    He knows all of this. About one or two times a month, if his complaints about lack of energy, his back hurting, his inability to get a good night's sleep ramp up too much - then I remind him that losing weight would help all of those things. To which he replies he knows, and maybe he'll work on adjusting his routine to start having time in the morning to get on the treadmill before work. He is all or none, so if he does not make the time to exercise then he will not make the effort to level out his food intake. Yet for him, even consuming 2000-2500 calories per day: would lead to slow & gradual weight loss.

    It is annoying. And frustrating to know I can't do anything 'for' him. I just hope he gets motivated before he has a major health crisis.
    springlering62 wrote: »
    I feel ya @nanastaci2020

    All we can do is try to set a good example. i feed him healthy meals, same as what I eat.

    I can’t figure out how he’s putting on weight, and he’s very defensive if I say anything. He put up with my weight for years so I can’t say anything. I figure he’s like a squirrel. One of these days some secret spot in the wall is going to burst and all his “nuts” will come pouring out.

  • slickmickey
    slickmickey Posts: 113 Member
    nanastaci2020 wrote: »
    There is no doubt as to the why for Hubs. He is very much routine oriented. And his current routine has him sitting in his car for work or sitting on the couch or in bed watching tv when not at work. And eating more calories than he needs most days, because he goes all day without eating (it does not fit into his routine) and then is very hungry (surprise!) and eats too much at night. I'm not saying eating at night is bad, but the amount he eats is too much and then that contributes to his sleeping issues. (Heart burn.)
    springlering62 wrote: »
    I feel ya @nanastaci2020

    routine is a b****

    every morning i would drive to starbucks, then for the longest time i was going around the corner and hitting the drive-through. it was simple, fast, and on my way to work so there was no reason not to. i was getting food, caffeine, and still getting to work in the same amount of time basically (i mean, order starbucks on the app, it's ready when you get there, drive thru, 3 minutes maybe?).

    so when i tried to stop eating mcdonalds/tacobell breakfast i was STARVING by the time 10am rolled around, but if i tried to make breakfast at home i would have to get up like 30 minutes earlier to cook and clean... blah. i tried to make breakfast sandwiches ahead and put them in the fridge but that was a disaster (i did something wrong for sure).

    anything that can help with the routine will help overall. having a premade lunch since he's already in his car? he can munch between jobs/appointments? or at least small snacks so he's not famished when he gets home. starting on a daily heartburn med might help with at least getting better sleep. now that i've cut down on overeating at night, i havent had a single night of heartburn and it was a daily thing for me too
  • silverpl2525
    silverpl2525 Posts: 138 Member
    Well, the more the weigh at the start it seems to be easier to lose more quickly in the beginning of weight loss. I wish he knew how he is putting his health at risk with his weight, and all those medical problems. I don't believe he lost 23 pounds in a week.
  • gisem17
    gisem17 Posts: 50 Member
    I'm pretty sure he didn't lose 23 lbs of fat in a week. That would require a calorie deficit of 11,500 calories. If I didn't eat anything all week and ran a marathon every day, I still wouldn't come close to that. What is more likely is that he lost 23 lbs of mostly water. If he has just been to the doctor and got new or stronger meds for the conditions you listed, many of those meds work by pulling water out of the body.

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