Want to love life again

thresholds · January 2021

I am a 46 year old stay at home mom that has realized I have gained 50lb+, I’m always tired, and tired of not wanting to do fun things anymore, because I’m embarrassed of my weight. I want to love life again, and feel healthy and strong. I want to look in the mirror and love what I see again. I want to be able to stay fit, and healthy, so I can still do fun active things with my family, and still be around for them when I’m older.

Ddsb11 · January 2021

My heart really really goes out to you! I can hear how much you want the joyful and healthy version of you again, I completely relate. Finding your why is a big step in the right direction. I’m so desperate to make 2021 different I refuse to fall back into 2020 patterns. I can’t. This gives me hope that by the end of the year I’ll have so much progress to look back on. You’ve got this! And you know what? You might even enjoy and have fun committing to this process 🤍

snowflake954 · January 2021

Well, you can achieve all that. Just plug your stats into MFP, get your daily calorie goal, buy a digital food scale, start weighing and measuring all your food and drink, and try to stay within your goal everyday. Take your measurements and keep them weekly in a journal. When the scale doesn't budge it's nice to open up that journal and physically see the inches lost. Read the success stories on MFP when you need a pick-me-up.

Just keep going no matter what. Exercise, if you can, and MFP will give you more calories for that day. Good luck.

Strudders67 · January 2021

I agree with snowflake that you can achieve that.

Don't try to do it too quickly - far better to go slow and learn what portion sizes work for you, what keeps you feeling full etc. Weighing and measuring your food / logging everything you eat or drink is the best way to track but, if sweeping change is a little daunting, perhaps start by putting one less potato on your dinner plate, serve yourself a smaller portion of pasta or rice, eat more salad or vegetables instead, swap sugary drinks for diet versions or swap a piece of fruit for biscuits or cake on occasions. Don't deprive yourself, as that's likely to lead to failure, but make small changes where and when you can that will add up to weight loss.

You won't lose weight every week, and certainly not every day - the scales will fluctuate for multiple reasons - but regularly compare yourself to how you were a month ago and keep going. It's better to be losing a little over a month than to think you'll never be fit / healthy / whatever and just give up, achieving nothing but frustration.

I started on here four years ago yesterday. For the first six months I made small changes and reached my initial goal just before my 50th birthday. I then got a new job, had endless snacks available in the office every day and, due to family issues going on as well, found I had absolutely no willpower. I also stopped tracking on MFP. I put a fair amount of that weight back on again over the next six months. Three years ago, I had a health scare and faced reality. I needed to make a more concerted effort. Back on MFP, I found this forum and learned a lot from reading other people's posts and answers from people with a lot of experience. I lost all the weight I wanted to by last March. Sure, it took just over two years, but I learned a lot in that time and I'm a lot, lot healthier than I was a few years ago.

Look at your meals after you've logged them and see what tweaks you can make. I still eat pastries, cakes, biscuits and other snacks, just not as often (or as many) as I did. I still eat pasta, rice, and potatoes, just not the quantities that I did. I also bulk out some of my meals with cauliflower rice, courgetti and more veg. Some of my regular meals are higher in cals than others but I plan ahead and balance them with the days when my breakfast is lower cal or the days when I know I'l be doing a lot of exercise and will have more cals to play with. Everyone does it differently but, for me, it was easier to eat smaller portions of the foods that I like than to cut stuff out and feel deprived.

In six months, hopefully you can look back and say "I've lost x pounds - wow, good for me".

MidlifeCrisisFitness · January 2021

jump rope

exhilen · January 2021

Know that you are among friends, here.

I am in the same boat. After some medication mishaps and a foot injury, I went from a long distance runner and heavy lifter to completely sedentary. Then I got Covid, which has knocked down even my ability to walk for long periods of time. Looking at about a 45lb gain at this point.

That being said, start with small steps. Right now, my goal is just to hit my 10k steps daily. Something that used to be a give for me, is now something I work towards. And that’s okay. Setting small goals will help the overwhelmed feeling, and let you ease into all of this. Even if it’s a small goal once every two weeks, you can keep adding to them without the burn out that many experience with adding too much at one time.

Most of all, good luck. You’ve got this.

ReenieHJ · January 2021

I can relate to this somewhat. I've always been overweight, ups and downs here and there. Being a young mom was hard for me to care for myself while caring for children. And it's hecka stressful! Stress=eating for me.

Looking back there were times of losing a good amount of weight my whole life. Trying to figure out how it happened and why it never stuck(and still doesn't I guess because I'm back to needing to lose 25-30#). *sigh*

You've gotten some wise helpful advice. I'm going to add one more thought and that is, can you get your family on board with your goals? See if you can shop/cook a more healthy way for everybody. Get a physical activity that everybody can enjoy, regular walks, swimming, hiking, biking, anything that promotes movement and fun together. I know someone suggested jumping rope and was disagreed with

but that can be a lot of fun actually. Same with hula hoops. Get the music out and do dancing with the kids.
For me, having regained weight this past year, I feel sooo lazy, depressed, and unmotivated.

It's cold and all I want to do is curl up with a good book or watch a movie(won't even go into my food intake ).

Last fall of 2019 I was dancing in my kitchen while cooking. I was walking every day and planking and using my hula hoop and treadmill.
Now I'm a schlump.

I(and you) need to work on the mindset to turn it all around and find that spark that will light the change we need.
Maybe set a goal? This might go against some peoples' ways of doing things but my dd and I planned a trip to Iceland for the fall of 2019 and that gave me a definite goal; I wanted to lose weight before I went. So I did. Easy peasy. Did lots of walking while we were there so it inspired me to keep walking when I got home and I did, plus with the holidays coming I wanted to lose more weight. So I did. Then Covid struck and family issues came along, nothing to look forward to or to have as a goal so have been struggling mightily ever since. It's more challenging when you have nothing ahead of you to look forward to. At least that's the way it is for me.

Good luck to you!!!! Find that spark that sets you off!!

panda4153 · January 2021

You can absolutely do this, it just takes consistency and time. One thing I would like to add is to not let your weight now stop you. One of the biggest learnings I found in my journey was to enjoy life along the way. Go on vacation, buy clothes that your feel good in, enjoy time with people you love. If I had waited until I lost weight and hit my goal, I would still be waiting. It’s a journey. Doing those things along the way, loving myself along the way, has helped me stick to the journey and stay on the path.

Good luck!!

elisa123gal · January 2021

Mom's typically put themselves last; by the time they give to everyone around them..there is nothing left for themselves.

Yet, think of all the energy you'll have for your family when you feel fantastic. It is great that you are going to put yourself first. Come here and take on your journey. As soon as you start eating right and hydrating.. you will immediately start feeling better. This community will help you focus, stay motivated..and will give you a place to come to foster your personal goals. Be sure to read the success forum ..and you will see that many people have had success losing not only 50 pounds ..but much more.

I'm excited for you! Best of luck.

vanmep · January 2021

In 2016 I was in a similar spot to what you’re describing. I started that year off by making a commitment to myself to figure out what a healthier happier me would look like. One thing I decided to do was to start tracking everything I ate and all the exercise I did for one year. I set the year goal so that I wouldn’t be distracted so much by what the scale was doing. The first few weeks were super informative as I started to learn about myself and what I was actually eating. Then I started to develop some goals and notice a few changes n myself. It ended up taking me two years to lose 40 pounds - I’m a plodder rather than a racer lol. And I have maintained it. This last year has been tough for various reasons and I gained about 8 pounds I thinks. So I’m back 😆. I loooove the thread called “what’s your NSV (non scale victory) it is incredibly inspiring as to how people find beautiful ways to change their lives and reach goals .

Want to love life again

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