In need of friends who understand!!!

AFettes21
AFettes21 Posts: 81 Member
edited October 2 in Introduce Yourself
My name is Amber and I have dealt with weight issues my entire life. I have tried to diet so many times, I can't even count the attempts anymore! It seems that I do really well for a few days and then I get off track and quit. I feel that nobody really understands what I am going through. All of my family members are skinny, with the exception of my grandmother. But even she doesnt weigh as much as I do. 2 years ago, I married my best friend, who is skinny, and this year in June, we welcomed a daughter into this world. Now I feel like I have even more reason to make a change. But it's hard to explain how I am feeling to my husband because he just does not understand. He doesnt know what it feels like to walk into a room and have people snicker and make jokes. He doesnt deal with the self-esteem issues and the feelings of disgust every time he looks in the mirror. I need people who understand what I am going through...people who will push me along when I feel like giving up. Could you be that person?

Replies

  • nikkizmom1962
    nikkizmom1962 Posts: 93 Member
    Hi and welcome to a great support system. Mfp has helped me so much I am constantly learning about my journey since I started in June. I have found many friends here that are my motivation when needed and even a Woohoo when needed. I too have a husband who is clueless since he is thin he just doesnt understand i cant eat the way we used to.....so feel free to add me and we can support each other
  • I need to save this to show my wife how lucky she is that she doesn't have a skinny husband. :) Best of luck on your lifestyle change.
  • juleseybaby
    juleseybaby Posts: 712 Member
    Welcome to MFP. This is a great place for support.

    I have some of the same issues. A hubby in better shape, doing well for a while and then back to being bad. It's tough - but this site can help. Realize that one bad meal doesn't have to mean the rest of the day is bad. And then - if it is - the next day can be back to healthy choices.

    The counting is the most important part. If you have to - leave your diary private - and track every single thing that goes in your mouth. Once you see how all the little things add up - it makes it easier to make smarter choices. At least that's how it has worked for me. I had a rotten day yesterday for sure. But today - I am back to smarter choices.

    Just don't give up. YOU have control!
  • Klein1475
    Klein1475 Posts: 248 Member
    hi and welcome to MFP... This a great support system... You can add me as a friend... I do understand everything you explained... Been there myself... My name is Tammy...

    Best of luck...
  • lenwie
    lenwie Posts: 240
    Totally understand where your coming from and am with you all the way, been fighting this battle since my late teens. HAving a husband, children and friends that are all slender or what I would call ok, they just dont get it! Feel free to add me as a friend and deffo track everyday, MFP & community is just fab. Best of luck x
  • lenwie
    lenwie Posts: 240
    Totally understand where your coming from and am with you all the way, been fighting this battle since my late teens. HAving a husband, children and friends that are all slender or what I would call ok, they just dont get it! Feel free to add me as a friend and deffo track everyday, MFP & community is just fab. Best of luck x

    (oops dont kmow why this posted twice?)
  • anna_b1
    anna_b1 Posts: 588 Member
    I was where you were in January and the support on this site made all the difference.

    Feel free to friend me and we'll support one another through this!

    Welcome!
  • Hi amber
    I started today so please add me i really hope we can both reach our goals and help each other out
    Good Luck
  • bluegirl10
    bluegirl10 Posts: 695 Member
    Hi and Welcome! You will love MFP and the support here...it's wonderful! :) I am the same way, as I have had weight issues all my life... Lost, gained, lost, gained, etc...blah! My husband can eat whatever he wants and not gain any weight!

    Just remember to take things one day at time.. If you fall off the wagon, get up and get back on!... That's what I'm doing and I know I will one day get to my goal because I've been there before and I am determined to be there again!... Don't get me wrong some days are really hard, but I don't give up!...It's not an option!

    Good luck and feel free to add me, if you like! :)
  • skinnyme47
    skinnyme47 Posts: 802 Member
    Welcome to My Fitness Pal! :smile:
  • melvac
    melvac Posts: 333 Member
    Hi amber and welcome,

    You are at the right place we have all faced some or most of the issues you described. I do understand when on my side of the fence others don't know where I am coming fromm in 2006 I had a gastric bypass lost 185#'s never got to goal weight but am happy to have lost what I did. Now back to the drawing board, I want to get to my goal weight and now I gotta do it just like everyone else, I call it being Fit and Free. When I have questions I bring it to the team here, I get real answers and suggestions from genuine folks here that are doing or have done what I am trying to do. This site opens your eyes for a lot of things we learn a lot and when applied the results are fantastic....
    I did send you a friend request...Melva
  • Welcome to MFP. I am new too, just started yesterday and I love it already!! Feel free to add me.
  • Amber I am in your shoes. My boyfriend is in shape and has never been overweight. Although he is supportive of me losing weight, he doesn't fully understand why. He is not the one who turns heads and gets laughs because of his size. He doesn't have to worry if he can fit in a plastic lawn chair and if it will hold him. and other things like those ect....I know we can both reach our goals! I am sending you a friends request
  • Know where you are. I have sent you a friend request.
  • HawaiiCam
    HawaiiCam Posts: 23 Member
    Welcome! MFP is such an amazing support. I too have struggled with weight for some time and have had my trails and tribulations with the scale. My husband is also super fit. He has never struggled with his weight and eats whatever he wants. It's so annoying LOL. Feel free to add me. We can do it. Just understand that weight loss and maintenance is just like anything else, you will hit rocky moments.
  • Hi Amber and welcome.... I understand what it is like to struggle with weight. I have been on the weight loss roller coaster for most of my life. I joined MFP 3 weeks ago and I have lost 8lbs and am still going strong. I haven't been perfect but I don't give up, this website is amazing and has helped me so much. Please feel free to add me.
  • Amber, I was the same way 8 years ago when I hit my rock bottom with my weight and compulsive overeating. I could not stick to a diet for more than 2 days in a row because I wanted to eat and period. Even if I lost weight, I gained it right away. The longest I could be on a diet was 2 months of time. At that point I realized I needed help with my emotional issues and sought counselor for help and enrolled in a group therapy later on. Once you realize you have deeper issues to resolve (in my case food addiction to junk food and sugar and family and social life problems), your urge to eat will disappear. You need to stop thinking of going on a diet and need to adopt living a healthy lifestyle by being moderately physically active every day, eating enough (I used to starve myself!) foods that will fill you up. All in all, it's just finding a way of eating that is balanced and most importantly works for you. The first step would be learning as much as you can about nutrition and exercise and then applying it to your life gradually.
  • hi hun, i completely understand how you feel i go through the same feelings on a daily basis. you can friend me if you like, we will beat the weigt!!!
  • womblesgirl
    womblesgirl Posts: 69 Member
    I understand as well, I have sent you a friend request so we can support each other with our journeys. Im loving some of the posts you have had back, sounds like a great bunch of people may send some more friend requests out :)
  • I understand exactly where you are coming from. You have made the right step just by joining this site so well done you. I have only been a member for a few days but already feel the love and support that everyone on this site gives out. Taking control of what you are eating by inputting every meal gives you a real sense of empowerment. Good luck to you sweet, feel free to add me as a friend. xx
  • nickm21
    nickm21 Posts: 248 Member
    I understand completely how you feel, joining MFP is the best thing you could have done. The message boards are so supportive, that if you feel like giving up or eating junk, make a post and watch the replies roll in. Everyone here is going through, or has been through, the same thing and we are all here for each other, whether it's to talk you out of giving up or congratulating you when you are doing well. Good luck on your journey xx :flowerforyou:
  • MFP is the right place to be, if it wasn't for MFP i know i wouldn't have lasted this long! I was the same never being able to stick to the life style change. My family wouldn't be supportive only reconise the bad choices i made when i needed a chocolate or sumfink i shouldn't be eating, But with all my new MFP friends im more determined than i've ever been and actually feel like i could do this :)
    Feel free to add me...
  • I know exactly what you mean when it comes to dieting, for a few days then quitting. It is really hard. Im really busy, and quick food is usually fatty non healthy food. also, healthy food is way more expensive than junk food. I know what you mean. Like you said, If you can't do it for yourself, then think of you daughter, she needs her mother to see her grow up, and teach her everything she needs to know about this big beautiful world. You are going to stumble, maybe even fall, but get back up and try harder! Dont let anything, or anyone get you down, you just keep pushing and think of your baby the whole time. I wish you the best of luck on this long, hard, yet exciting journey!
  • Hello there, I do understand your pain and I would like very much to be a part of your support group. This is a really great site and so much support and love here. I would like very much to help you on your journey to be a healthier you. feel free to add me...
  • Hi,
    I have always been slim (well according to the BMI underweight but that is not the most reliable method!)
    But I understand what it feels like to feel fat. I put on 3 kg and suddenly the body that I thought was gorgeous is now ugly to me. The little roll of fat when I turn to the side makes me angry at myself. That my tummy is no longer flat annoys me.
    Yet I realise I still need to love my body as its doing everything it needs to-keeping me alive, staying active (I work out 7 days a week) and makes my fiancee very happy.
    So embrace your body, even if you don't like it right now, enjoy it for what it can do for you.
    But change it. I don't accept that the 3kg I put on will stay on-I will lose it, as I have done before, get back to my usual weight-but not hate myself til I get to that 52/53kg!
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