Tips for getting out when you're Single w Depression

cstil · May 2021

Obviously COVID made literally everything stress filled and more difficult. That aside, what are some tips y'all have for getting past that road block to leave the house and get moving? Depression and anxiety are awesome, lol. That mental road block is really kicking my chunky Italian butt.

goal06082021 · May 2021

I assume you're in the Northern hemisphere, so at the very least the weather's going to get progressively nicer for the next six months or so.

The key is baby steps. Can you negotiate with yourself to do one little piece at a time? It's OK if you just don't have the spoons to fully Do The Thing - just doing one little piece, proving to yourself bit by bit that Yes, Actually, You Can, despite what the Depression tells you.

Like, body says don't WANNA go for a walk. Well, how about we just put on our shoes? Maybe that day you do just put on your shoes and sit on the couch.

But maybe that day you say to body, Oh look, we have our shoes on. We could at least just go out the front door for a breath of fresh air, yeah? And maybe that day you do just go stand outside your front door for a minute.

But maybe that day you say to body, Heck, we're already outside, let's just take a leisurely stroll. We'll just walk down the street for a few minutes, then we can go back home. Literally set a timer on your phone for five minutes, pick a direction, and double back the way you came when the timer goes off.

And bam, next thing you know you've gone for a 10-minute walk, which is 10 more minutes of exercise than you got yesterday. Take that, Depression! Maybe that's plenty for today (walking is an endurance sport!), but maybe you do this a few days in a row, and when you get back home after 10 minutes, you feel good and the weather's nice and you decide to go out for another 5 minute stroll. Bam! 20 minutes of exercise like it was nothing. You rock!

Depression is the crappy partner that lives in your head and gaslights you about EVERYTHING and living with it is constantly proving it wrong about EVERYTHING. It's tough. You might also want to look into mental-health support if it is available to you; it's much easier when you have someone in your corner backing you up when you stand up to Depression. Medication may or may not be necessary - that's a conversation between you and your MH professional - but it's okay to explore options and have someone confirm that your brain is being a lying jerkface to you right now and none of the awful things it's saying about you are true.

girlwithcurls2 · May 2021

^^^
This. Wow. I don't know if there is much of anything to add to this. It sounds like the Voice of Experience. OP, this explanation of how to take baby steps is awesome. I wish you the best. One day at a time. One HOUR at a time, if need be.

tluisa311 · May 2021

I'm struggling with this myself so feel free to add me and maybe we can talk each other through it!
I live in northern VA as of 2017. My family lives back in New England and I have zero single friends, so I constantly struggle with the idea of being alone ALL the time. I don't even date bc I feel so uncomfortable with my body right now, so it's just me and the dog!
Some days are good, some are bad. Sometimes I feel motivated to go places alone, but when I get there I find myself just staring at everyone who ISN'T there alone and it makes me feel worse. Some days I'm just glad I got out of the house. It's a constant struggle, but I try to remember that every situation is temporary unless we force ourselves to stay in it!

cstil · June 2021

Definitely in the northern hemisphere, New England. Luckily, the weather has been getting nicer. I like the idea of baby steps. Thank you.

Tips for getting out when you're Single w Depression

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