I'm so confused on where to start at this point and really need help

Y'know what?

You have a theory about what to do. It's not a bad theory, IMO, in any obvious way.

Why not test out your theory? Do the calorie goal, and the walking, for 4-6 weeks, and see what happens. If you lose at a satisfying rate (hint: use the chart posted above to find a sensible loss rate), you're golden. If you lose too fast (which can sap energy, increase health risks, etc.), eat more. If you lose too slowly (and have enough wiggle room to lose faster, safely), eat a little less.

Eat how much more or less? Assume that 500 calories a day is 1 pound of weekly weight loss, and adjust on that basis. For example, if you're averaging half a pound a week loss, and a pound loss weekly would be better, eat 250 fewer calories daily.

Be aware that water weight fluctuations will mask weight loss on the scale, and scale weight will therefore bounce up and down, even if fat loss really is happening. And fat loss is what we really want, right? Over 4-6 weeks, you'll see the fat loss in your weight *trend*, like the averages, not necessarily in weight loss every day.

(If you were a woman, I'd suggest you compare weights at the same relative point in at least two different menstrual cycles, but you're a guy, so 4-6 weeks should work. If the first couple of weeks look unusual (sometimes there's extra water weight weirdness at first), then toss those from consideration, use the next 4.)

To answer some of your specific questions:

Does lifting weights or doing push ups really benefit if I'm burning my calories?

Doing some kind of strength exercise during weight loss will remind your body that when it's thinking of what tissues to burn in order to lose weight, it shouldn't burn muscles, because you're using them and need them. Since muscles are slow and quite a bit of effort to increase, it makes sense to keep as many of them as you can while you're losing weight. Also, most people prefer their appearance with a bit of muscle in the picture.

You can do weights or bodyweight exercises, whichever works for you, as long as you do something that's just a bit of a challenge to your current strength.

You'll get better results from a well-designed program than from just doing stuff. There's a list of good programs here:

http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10332083/which-lifting-program-is-the-best-for-you/p1

Food:
I'm beyond confused at this point. What should my macros be in myfitnesspal? I have the premium version as well. I'm not sure what "diet" I should use and have no idea what to do anymore. I'm more or less looking for a meal plan but one that isn't the same thing every....single....day let alone every monday is x, every tuesday is y etc.

I like pretty much everything except seafood.

Honestly, the MFP default macros aren't terrible for most people, at a sensible calorie goal. Just work to come close to the protein and fat goals as minimums, and that'll be fine. It's good to eat lots of nice varied, colorful veggies & fruits for micronutrients and fiber, too, with a bonus that many people find them filling. You don't have to hit exact macro numbers every day, just shoot for averaging somewhere in the neighborhood, that'll be fine.

At first, I'd say don't even worry about the macros much at all, just focus on hitting around your calorie goal, and feeling sated and happy while doing so.

You don't need to do some special named diet, unless you find that helpful. I used this eating approach, which (I think) is similar to what quite a few successful people here have done:

http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10636388/free-customized-personal-weight-loss-eating-plan-not-spam-or-mlm/p1

Basically, it's a methodical way of starting from more-or-less how you eat now, and gradually tweaking that to improve things, balancing satiation, nutrition, practicality, tastiness, etc.

I have access to an Anytime Fitness by me that I can signup for, but I also have access to at home stuff as well such as a weight vest/oculus quest 2/apple fitness +. I'm really just so confused with all of the information out there today that I feel like the landscape for it all changes daily. What to eat, when to eat, how much to have, what kind of workouts you should do. Do this not that etc and honestly its motivationally killing and I see myself for years now picking something up, then dropping it within a few weeks. Any help is greatly appreciated.

On the workout front: Do something that fits into your overall life while keeping good overall life balance, i.e., enough time/energy for family, job, chores, social connections and anything else truly important to you. Ideally the exercise will be a small but manageable challenge, energizing rather than exhausting. Fun exercise you'll actually do is more effective than theoretically "better" but miserable/punitive exercise you hate and put off at the slightest excuse.

As you get fitter, you'll be able to go harder, longer, or more frequently, to burn more calories and keep that bit of challenge, if you want to; that's better than going pedal to the metal right away, exhausting yourself, and dragging through daily life (burning fewer calories in daily life as a consequence). In the long run, you maybe will find different things fun as you get fitter, and that's fine, too.

Mostly, your common sense will work OK: Experiment to dial in your calorie needs, eat food you like that's reasonably nutritious, do some fun exercise that's not exhausting. The blogosphere needs to make it way more complicated, but that's so you think you can't handle this yourself, and need to pay them for books, programs, meal plans, exercise equipment, supplements, and who knows what all else.

Start simple, as you've outlined. Then, observe and adjust. Learn more along the way (about nutrition, exercise, cooking, whatever), and tweak what you're doing in happy, productive ways. It'll be fine. You can do it.

Best wishes!

I can relate to your confusion. I felt similarly from reading lots, spending a lifetime trying to lose weight etc, I got to a point that I think I’d kind of given up and assumed it was all hopeless. None of the above advice and approaches sound at all wrong, but I wonder if the piece of the jigsaw that’s missing is you? I have managed to identify some very specific approaches to weight loss which work for me - my personality, my strengths and weaknesses, my likes and dislikes, and my lifestyle. It helped my to find a path through it all, and I fully expect there to be changes as I change. Perhaps spend some time thinking about what you can and can’t commit to - for the long term - and work back from there. For instance, I need to know that on a Friday I can have 2 glasses of wine. A small thing really, but I’ve had to account for that in my plan. I find not eating lunch on workdays easy to do, so I cut back on my calories easily through the week that way. Both these things might change but right now, it’s working for me.

sfranklin725 wrote: »

The question I need to answer is should I let the workout let me eat more or keep it at a 1000 calorie deficient now.

Don't use exercise for weight loss, use it for health and also to make losing weight at a sensible rate easier with a bigger food allowance.

Make exercise a lifelong habit for health and enjoyment, you can start building those habits now rather than wait until you get to goal weight. As you have physique goals a big deficit is hugely counter-productive. It's sadly far too common on these boards for people to rapidly lose weight and be horribly disappointed when they get to goal they just look like a shrunken version of their former self rather than an athlete.

Really fight this need for fast results and instead work on sustainability. In many ways learning to maintain is the key to losing weight. If your default is weight maintenance then making small adjustments to lose becomes much easier.