Friend complained I was obsessed!?

Minnesnowtagurl
Minnesnowtagurl Posts: 406 Member
edited October 2 in Motivation and Support
Hello MFP,
yesterday I was talking to my friend and she brought up my weight loss and she mentioned that I am "obsessed." I thought, gee what a negative word choice. I try to share most of my weight loss stories and complaints with MFP instead of my non virtual friends because you all share the same stories, complaints and struggles. I don't feel like obsessing about weight loss is necessarly an awful thing when you are/were over weight. I wouldn't go with the jealous thing because she is 5'8" and 115 lbs. I guess I am not sure why that word stuck. I guess I am just venting?? I don't know, it just bothered me. She talks about her three kids all day long and I try to not sound like her with the scale. LOL

Replies

  • Sarabear3080
    Sarabear3080 Posts: 3
    I dont think obsessed is a good word at all. I would say focused and determined. I know people can be obsessed with weight but if you are only wanting to get healthy how can that be an obsession. We only have one body and we should be proud we are taking care of it. Those who dont worry about their weight just will never understand.
  • H_Factor
    H_Factor Posts: 1,722 Member
    whether its called an obsession or simply good ol' dedication and focus, its nice to focus your energy on positive things like your own good health rather than the various things that other folks obsess/focus about (i.e., TV watching, couch potatoitis, etc.)
  • hjaawyk
    hjaawyk Posts: 10
    I would go with the idea that she probably is a little jealous. It may not be because of her weight but it could be because you are determined and successful. You've accomplished a lot and maybe it makes her feel like she hasn't accomplished much. I'm not sure.. I'm not her but it makes sense to me. I find it very frustrating that some of my friends tell me I should stop dieting and live life and hand me a freakin donut that I do not need or want. They make me feel guilty for trying to feel better about myself.. what is up with that?!?
  • khartley535
    khartley535 Posts: 151 Member
    I don't think it is jealously about your weight loss itself, but possibly jealousy about you being successfull at something. It could have been anything, and this just happens to be it. Could also be an issue of her worrying or thinking of you as a "rival" of sorts now because of how much better looking you are getting due to the healthier lifestyle. JMT.
  • kelseylou
    kelseylou Posts: 44 Member
    I have to agree with the post above. Focused and determined are far better words than obsessed. I personally have to stay on track if I want to achieve my goals, and focusing on my diary is the best way to do it!
  • kgordon7
    kgordon7 Posts: 130 Member
    No one has called me obsessed just yet, but my family do tell me that I'm getting too small, and I'm like how the heck am I getting too small when I still have areas that need more toning and more fat loss. I think it's because they're not use to me being that size, but I told them when I'm comfortable with my body the way I want it, then I'll stop trying to lose and just maintain. I feel like why when you're doing something positive such as losing weight and bettering your health everyone has something negative to say, but when you're gaining and have very unhealthy eating habits, no one says a word.


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  • tigersword
    tigersword Posts: 8,059 Member
    It's very easy to slide from focus into obsession, and obsessing over weight can be just as unhealthy and detrimental to living as being overweight. Maybe you should talk to your friend about it and get more clarification. Quite often, we obsess over things without realizing it, and when people close to us try and point that out, we brush them off and scoff at them. It's just as easy to get addicted to weight loss as it is to anything else.

    Just some food for thought on the Devil's Advocate side.
  • Minnesnowtagurl
    Minnesnowtagurl Posts: 406 Member
    You all have made some great points. A MFP once told me "you are a visual/physical reminder of where many people have failed."..but I guess I had a hard time placing this one since she has three kids and is the size of a high schooler at age 32 and can loose 10 pounds in a month if she is stressed. She is a person that has NEVER struggled with being over weight and had to fight hard at getting rid of it.

    I have talked to my husband and my best friend who tell me everything in the most honest way possible (even if it will hurt my feelings) . Especially when I am being out of line. They both told me they do not feel I am obsessed. I often worry if I come off that way so I keep the weight loss world to myself, unless people ask.

    The only thing I can think of is that since we are co-workers she sees me on MFP.com on our down times and that may be what she is associating the obssesion with?...
  • tsnowden1881
    tsnowden1881 Posts: 7
    You've come along way, so dont bite ur tongue be proud of ur accomplishment and ur still going!!!!!! Maybe she said that b/c she doesnt really have anything to add to the conversation??? she doesnt struggle with her weight so she doesnt really have any feedback to give and maybe feels left out?? who knows...but I've heard that too from my coworker but for me to keep focus and stay motivated my weight and makin the correct choices is always gonna be on my mind b/c its very easy to lose focus and go back to the old ways that blew me up to 250 in the first place
  • prettybrownround
    prettybrownround Posts: 362 Member
    Well, I say its a great obession to have. I hv been told the samething. MFP played an intricate role in my weight loss and I will forever stay committed to it. She can lose 10lbs by stressing out, you lose 10lbs by utilizing MFP. To each its own.
  • roblow65
    roblow65 Posts: 156 Member
    I completely agree that she probably is a little jealous and that while "obsessed" isn't a positive word, what a great "obsession" to have! To get healthy and feel great and have energy, to go shopping and know that everything they have will fit you and and you look great! I'm happily on that kick too! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • Minnesnowtagurl
    Minnesnowtagurl Posts: 406 Member
    Thank you all! Keep it coming because I need it. ♥♡♥♡♥ ツ
  • Camey44
    Camey44 Posts: 38 Member
    Unfortunately, what we would call a commitment others would call obsession due to their inability to understand why you have committed so strongly to your weight loss goal and your new healthy way of living. If she is looking for a junk food buddy tell her to look elsewhere.

    I went to burger king today and was looking at the nutritional value chart before making my order. A stranger looked at me and said you only live once... I responded yes but I want to live it as healthy as possible. Maybe my checking the nutritional value chart isn’t common for all but my checking it doesn’t mean I am obsessing it means I am making valid choices to benefit my lifestyle.

    Do not stray from your COMMITMENT!!! :wink:
  • cgavin77
    cgavin77 Posts: 219
    She talks about her three kids all day long and I try to not sound like her with the scale. LOL

    I wouldnt worry too much about it...she probably just wants the conversation turned back to her and her 3 'darling' kids. :yawn:
  • leilani♥
    leilani♥ Posts: 579
    I obsess about exercising, eating healthy & weight loss. I don't see anything wrong with it LOL :)
  • erinkeely4
    erinkeely4 Posts: 408 Member
    I tend to throw around the word "obsessed" too often, and don't mean anything bad by it... I can't say that's where she's coming from. I tend to exaggerate with words. Like, I use the word "awesome," "obsessed," "totally," "super," even when they aren't really called for... ha.
  • LuckieSC
    LuckieSC Posts: 31
    yes girl nothing is wrong with wanting to look great and be healthy; just because a person is physically fit or did not struggle with her weight does not mean she does not have other demons; or maybe she could not think of any other word to use but obsessed due to her word knowledge. I currently have "friends" who are hating on me now; every time I post something on FB regarding me working out or eating right or anything that I now leave on MFP (love my family) they will hate. I cannot wait until I have my before and after pics as so many of my MFP family have...so I can shut them down; We love ya girl and hey if you looking that good means you are obsessed then WE ALL WILL BE JUST THAT "OBSESSED"
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