Sad-encouragement or advice?

Eating enough is an essential part of weight loss. That may seem like a bit of an oxymoron, but hear me out: I speak from experience.

So, I've lost quite a bit of weight several times in my life. The first time was when I was 19-20, and I was trying to impress a girl. Lost 40 pounds by essentially starving myself for six months. And hey, it worked! I even started dating said girl! But then, the moment I slipped up, I immediately put it all back on and then some. Within a year, I had gained 50 pounds... and than number just went up when I broke up with that girlfriend six months after that.

After that, I got up to about 30 pounds heavier than when I first started trying to lose weight, and I once again decided to lose weight, and once again I decided to basically starve myself and only eat 1500 calories/day. And I did!... for about four months. Then the holidays hit, I had a few family meals, enjoyed a fair few alcoholic drinks, and suddenly I was so far off the wagon that I couldn't even see it anymore. I ended up gaining all of my weight back, plus another 20 pounds this time.

This cycle repeated until March of 2020, and during the first year of the pandemic I put on even more weight, and was the heaviest I had ever been in my life. But then, I moved across the country for grad school, and I took the disruption of my routine to once again lose weight, and yep, you guessed it, I did it by starving myself. The exact same cycle repeated once more.

Fast forward to November of last year. I was feeling my weight and starting to develop health issues because of it. I didn't feel comfortable in my own skin, and hated seeing myself in photographs. I decided to once again lose weight. But this time, I decided not to starve myself. I'm now 25 pounds lighter, and it has never been easier to lose those pounds. I eat anywhere between 1800-2300 calories a day, but I also do 30 minutes of high-intensity cardio (spinning, usually) every day while listening to a podcast. I also started walking everywhere. Are either of those huge calorie burners? Well, the cardio actually is pretty good - about 400-500 or so calories each session - but the walking is more for my enjoyment. It still adds up to maybe 150 extra calories a day, though. Between the two, I can eat until I'm full and still lose weight.

And that last part is key: I can eat until I'm full and still lose weight. I am not even remotely worried about falling off the wagon like I have been in the past, because in the past staying on my diet was a horrible, energy-draining, soul-crushing challenge. I was ravenously hungry all the time, and tired, and cranky. Now, though? Nope. Sure, I get a little peckish at times, because I am still running a net calorie deficit, but never so bad that I can think of nothing but food. And because I'm actually eating enough, I don't have to worry about running out of willpower at some critical time and watching my usual cycle start all over again. For the first time ever, I'm even confident that, when I reach my target weight, I'll have no issue staying there, because it'll be easier than this part of the process, and this part of the process is already pretty easy!

Anyway. A very long way of saying this: eat enough calories to satisfy your body's needs, even if that makes your weekly deficit seem smaller than you would like, and supplement with exercise if you aren't already. You'll be a lot less miserable, and frankly, you'll probably have a better chance of staying the course. Good luck!