To leave or stay?!?!

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Deb2012
Deb2012 Posts: 124
in Motivation and Support
I am tossing up whether or not I ditch the forums as a way to ask for help or voice my opinions and experience in hopes of helping someone else.

As helpful as they can be I'm finding the amount of "know it alls" overwhelming. They make assumptions based on the one or two sentence comment you have posted. Based on this limited information they assume to know EVERYTHING about you, your life, your medical conditions, your history, struggles and achievements.

It's extremely frustrating to have someone "think" they know better when in fact they've never even spoken to you. Puts a downer on my journey (which isn't an easy one) everytime. Getting quite sick of it!

Replies

  • Dragonzfyre11
    Dragonzfyre11 Posts: 24
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    i hope you stay
  • amyllu
    amyllu Posts: 432 Member
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    Hi Dallas, I do know what you mean but really most people are trying to help. Unfortunately on this particular forum there is such a limited amount of info we can get about a person and therefore a word meant in good heart can be so misconstruded.

    If it is making you so unhappy then of course you would be better to do whatever suits you best but on the whole we are all rooting for you and hope you will be able to continue on your jopurney to your goal.

    Take care and all the very best to you ..... :smile:
  • Airport5x
    Airport5x Posts: 25 Member
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    Don't let them get you down Dallas! If the responses don't seem constructive then ignore them. But if you find it too hard to overlook them I'd would say if it puts a downer on you then yes, don't subject yourself to it. You need to surround yourself with encouragement. Hope you'll stay and continue to share.

    Take good care.
  • ladycomix
    ladycomix Posts: 104
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    So you're soliciting responses on the forum about whether to continue soliciting response on the forum...there might be a flaw in this plan.
  • JaenaM
    JaenaM Posts: 251 Member
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    Well babe u can leave the forums but then u have the same thing to deal with out there in life. It's all about doing u and trying to b the best u that u can be. Help the ones u can, help yourself, and fu*k the rest!!!! I think anyone with the courage to share their truth and stand strong under the fire of others is a hero. be a hero baby!!
  • dovesgate
    dovesgate Posts: 894 Member
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    It's easiest to assume we know whats best for others while still struggling to put it into place for ourselves. I'm a pompous little **** sometimes, I know. Lots of others are too. On behalf of all of us - sorry 'bout that.


    I like what JaenaM had to say too. :)
  • Blackthorne99
    Blackthorne99 Posts: 250 Member
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    I am tossing up whether or not I ditch the forums as a way to ask for help or voice my opinions and experience in hopes of helping someone else.

    As helpful as they can be I'm finding the amount of "know it alls" overwhelming. They make assumptions based on the one or two sentence comment you have posted. Based on this limited information they assume to know EVERYTHING about you, your life, your medical conditions, your history, struggles and achievements.

    It's extremely frustrating to have someone "think" they know better when in fact they've never even spoken to you. Puts a downer on my journey (which isn't an easy one) everytime. Getting quite sick of it!

    When something leaves you overwhelmed, the best response is to step away from it for a while. It doesn't mean you have to swear off ever giving advice again, but we all need a break sometimes.
  • Blackthorne99
    Blackthorne99 Posts: 250 Member
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    (for some reason, my message posted twice - don't know how to delete the duplicate)
  • Deb2012
    Deb2012 Posts: 124
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    I was merely writing this to get it out... not expecting any responses, but thanks!

    I'm all for freedom of speech but when people are quite obviously being arrogant about it, it's frustrating. Don't pretend to know me or know anything about me especially when you don't even know my name.

    I do like these forums, but it seems everytime I make a comment someone has to pick at it or think they know me better than I know myself. I see this happening to other people too, not just myself. I can be rather opinionated at times and I'd love to just "yell" back at them, but this is supposed to be about support and encouragement for everyone regardless of their goals.

    Maybe I'm just picking the wrong topics to comment on :tongue:
  • Deb2012
    Deb2012 Posts: 124
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    I am tossing up whether or not I ditch the forums as a way to ask for help or voice my opinions and experience in hopes of helping someone else.

    As helpful as they can be I'm finding the amount of "know it alls" overwhelming. They make assumptions based on the one or two sentence comment you have posted. Based on this limited information they assume to know EVERYTHING about you, your life, your medical conditions, your history, struggles and achievements.

    It's extremely frustrating to have someone "think" they know better when in fact they've never even spoken to you. Puts a downer on my journey (which isn't an easy one) everytime. Getting quite sick of it!

    When something leaves you overwhelmed, the best response is to step away from it for a while. It doesn't mean you have to swear off ever giving advice again, but we all need a break sometimes.

    Good point! Thanks. The amounts of times I have gone to comment on a post and deleted it because I couldn't be bothered dealing with the opinions I know I'll get, is getting higher. I had stepped away for a while recently and unfortunately my first post back today - someone had to bring it down, totally uncalled for too.
  • Pebble321
    Pebble321 Posts: 6,554 Member
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    I know what you mean, I have times when I swear I'm not going to keep reading the forums... but I can't look away :smile:

    My viewpoint is that this is a community - so there will always be someone who doesn't agree with someone else and has to tell us all about it. Just as there will always be people who agree or who can disagree respectfully.

    Communities are like that, at least with this one, there is an option to walk away!
  • amyllu
    amyllu Posts: 432 Member
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    I very often get frustrated when I have already made the point in one posting about not being able to exercise being as I am disabled and then some bright spark will put all sorts of exercise suggestions that I should do and it is obvious that they haven't bothered to read the whole thing. Grrrr!:mad:

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