Calling all middle aged men who have lost lots!

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emma1488
emma1488 Posts: 175
in Food and Nutrition
Hi guys,

So I'm finding out information for my Dad (Gutbusting) who has pretty much been overweight (closer to obese) most of his life. After finding so much success myself with this website, I have finally talked him into giving it a shot for himself. However, he is very reluctant and I wouldn't say 'lazy', but he won't measure and weigh foods for himself (I'm currently doing it for him).

What I wanted to find out was, when you started on your weight loss journey, where were you at? I mean, what were you doing for exercise, how many calories were you consuming, how long did it take you to lose X amount of kilograms/pounds etc.

His stats are:
Age: 54
Height: 177cm (5'8" I think?)
Current weight: 122 kilograms (268pounds)

He's not very fit and complains of back pain. Currently he is walking a moderate pace for about 30 mins most days. Any advice would be much appreciated. He is being compliant so far (day 3), but I would like for him to get more interested for himself.

Replies

  • fitplease
    fitplease Posts: 647 Member
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    Walking is a very good start. He can increase the distance or even the pace. Maybe some gentle stretches would also be good.
  • ljd0693
    ljd0693 Posts: 289 Member
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    You need to start off by getting him to a doctor for a physical. Maybe the doctor can scare him enough to get him to want to loose weight. Until he truly decides he committed to loosing weight you're fighting a loosing battle. You can only push him into exercising and eating right for so long.

    At my heaviest, I was 330 lbs. I've been overweight most of my life. It has taken a good 4 years to finally get my weight under control. I still have a little more to loose, but compared to where I was I feel great. I started out walking and then joined a gym, but I also ended up having to join a weight loss support group where you have to weigh in every week to keep me going in the right direction.

    You could check to see if there are any weight loss groups in the area that he could join for support and possibly find other people to exercise with.
  • tross0924
    tross0924 Posts: 909 Member
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    You can't do it for him. If he's not willing to make the effort then he won't. He can not succeed unless he wants to, no matter how much you want him to. And if you find the trick to make him want to, let me know so I can use it on my mom.

    That being said I plan on living past 70 so I might not qualify as middle aged, but in the beginning inmost 50 lbs without any exercise. Once I felt a little better I rode an exercise bike at a nice slow pace just to gt my heart rate up. Soon I got faster, and started becoming addicted to exercise. I'm 6' tall and started at 357 lbs. I ate 2000 calories a day and then tried to hit a 40/40/20 ratio. It's worked well so far :-)
  • CindyWarner
    CindyWarner Posts: 138
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    I'm not a man and I'm not middle aged but I have not exercised for a long time and I have not eatten healthy most of my life.
    I'm unable to do hard excercise for lengthy periods of times. So I'm starting slowly.

    First with diet. I've eliminated wheat, dariy and sugar. I've lots 7 pounds in 3 weeks because of changing my diet alone.
    Now that I've lost a bit of weight, I'm starting to change how I exercise in small ways: I walk to the bus instead of driving to work, I'm beginning to take stairs at work, starting with 2 flights at a time and now 3. I'm planning to work towards 8 flights of stairs.
    I bought a bike but realized that it's more exercise than I can handle right now, but I plan to bike to work when I can build up my strength and endurance.

    They say that losing weight is 70% diet and 30% exercise. Once he looses some weight through diet he may have less pain in his back and joints so he can do exercise. He may not be able to run for 30 minutes. But as long as what he is doing increases his heart rate or challenges his muscles, he is doing exercise. So encourage him to do what he can and he will improve in time.
  • emma1488
    emma1488 Posts: 175
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    You need to start off by getting him to a doctor for a physical. Maybe the doctor can scare him enough to get him to want to loose weight. Until he truly decides he committed to loosing weight you're fighting a loosing battle. You can only push him into exercising and eating right for so long.

    At my heaviest, I was 330 lbs. I've been overweight most of my life. It has taken a good 4 years to finally get my weight under control. I still have a little more to loose, but compared to where I was I feel great. I started out walking and then joined a gym, but I also ended up having to join a weight loss support group where you have to weigh in every week to keep me going in the right direction.

    You could check to see if there are any weight loss groups in the area that he could join for support and possibly find other people to exercise with.

    He's been to the doctor just recently. They have been working on his blood pressure and cholesterol. It has improved since his last visit and his doctor is encouraging him to lose weight through diet and exercise. His dad died about 16 years ago from bowel cancer and his mum had a quadruple bypass about 4 years ago. Both his sisters are on blood pressure medication and heavily overweight, one of them has already had a heart attack. It seems the scare tactic isn't working very well :S

    Can you remember the point that you decided enough is enough and how it happened?
  • emma1488
    emma1488 Posts: 175
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    You can't do it for him. If he's not willing to make the effort then he won't. He can not succeed unless he wants to, no matter how much you want him to. And if you find the trick to make him want to, let me know so I can use it on my mom.

    That being said I plan on living past 70 so I might not qualify as middle aged, but in the beginning inmost 50 lbs without any exercise. Once I felt a little better I rode an exercise bike at a nice slow pace just to gt my heart rate up. Soon I got faster, and started becoming addicted to exercise. I'm 6' tall and started at 357 lbs. I ate 2000 calories a day and then tried to hit a 40/40/20 ratio. It's worked well so far :-)

    I know I can't do it for him. You are absolutely right :(. But I figure I've got to at least try. I'm hoping that if he sees some results without too much deprivation, he might become inspired (fingers crossed!). How did you feel when you were eating 2000 cals? At your beginning weight you must have been eating a fair amount of crap before hand. Was it hard to stick to such a change in calories?
  • tross0924
    tross0924 Posts: 909 Member
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    You can't do it for him. If he's not willing to make the effort then he won't. He can not succeed unless he wants to, no matter how much you want him to. And if you find the trick to make him want to, let me know so I can use it on my mom.

    That being said I plan on living past 70 so I might not qualify as middle aged, but in the beginning inmost 50 lbs without any exercise. Once I felt a little better I rode an exercise bike at a nice slow pace just to gt my heart rate up. Soon I got faster, and started becoming addicted to exercise. I'm 6' tall and started at 357 lbs. I ate 2000 calories a day and then tried to hit a 40/40/20 ratio. It's worked well so far :-)

    I know I can't do it for him. You are absolutely right :(. But I figure I've got to at least try. I'm hoping that if he sees some results without too much deprivation, he might become inspired (fingers crossed!). How did you feel when you were eating 2000 cals? At your beginning weight you must have been eating a fair amount of crap before hand. Was it hard to stick to such a change in calories?

    It wasn't that bad at all really. I just got rid of the sweets and junk I was eating and ate just a bit less of the good stuff too. I wasn't really hungry. I broke that 2000 down into 6 meals, so I was eating all the time. If I ever did get hungry I knew that I only had an hour to go until I could eat again, and I could hold out that long. Other than avoiding the chips, soda, and twinkies, I didn't really alter what I ate too much. I ate everything I usually did, but just a portion size instead of seconds, and thirds.

    Have him send me a friend request and I'll help out as much as I can. You too for that matter. :-)

    Let me know if there's anything else I can do.
  • ljd0693
    ljd0693 Posts: 289 Member
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    He's been to the doctor just recently. They have been working on his blood pressure and cholesterol. It has improved since his last visit and his doctor is encouraging him to lose weight through diet and exercise. His dad died about 16 years ago from bowel cancer and his mum had a quadruple bypass about 4 years ago. Both his sisters are on blood pressure medication and heavily overweight, one of them has already had a heart attack. It seems the scare tactic isn't working very well :S

    Can you remember the point that you decided enough is enough and how it happened?

    Wow, if that didn't scare him then nothing will.

    Two things made me decide to finally loose weight.

    I was always afraid to go to the doctor because I figured that all those years of being overweight would have really messed me up, but to my surprise I was in great health other than having slightly elevated cholesterol. I figured that I better loose the weight before it did give me health problems.

    The main thing that made me decide to finally loose the weight was when my son asked me to go skydiving with him for his birthday and I had to tell him that I couldn't do it because I was over the weight limit. I promised him at that point that I would loose the weight and we would go skydiving together. Last year for my birthday we jumped from a perfectly good plane. :-)
  • bluebird321
    bluebird321 Posts: 733 Member
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    Walking is an excellent way to start; it's a nice fat-burner that won't get him tired and hungry; he will be able to focus on diet. At his age, most of the weight loss will definitely come via diet.

    I got a physical a while ago and was shocked at my triglyceride level, high bp, low hdl etc. I also kept putting on weight despite working out regularly. I decided it was a time for a change.

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