Thoughts on PCOS, Trauma, ADHD, and attachment styles
hararayne
Posts: 261 Member
I feel like I'm all over the place with the vast amount of information that is being thrown at me all the time. I'm trying with this post to put it all in one place the different themes I'm seeing pop up for me over and over again and hoping some kind souls want to discuss their thoughts on this.
I have PCOS. One of the things that is brought up constantly with PCOS is that it is an inflammation response and we have higher than normal cortisol levels. At least this is what I've seen. I've been told to eat a diet that's Paleo/whole 30/ avoid carbs/avoid wheat and dairy as these trigger inflammation. And of course I see other stuff talking about cortisol and that stress causes us to have increased cortisol and therefore a harder time losing weight.
Moving on, I see so many videos regarding ADHD and attachment styles and Trauma responses. I have seen a therapist. She was not particularly helpful but essentially I have been told by my family and the therapist that I do have ADHD traits. For me this means I am drawn to chaotic things. My job is constant changing direction of my attention. I choose partners that are, lets call it, emotionally challenging.
I have an anxious attachment style, and people pleasing tendencies. These are things that I know I need to work on and find more appropriate ways to deal with life and relationships.
But guys, really, what if I fix the mental side and that's all that's keeping me from my goals?
I don't know. I just feel overwhelmed with the same words being brought up in videos and discussions and the header topics are those things up above. Maybe they're not connected at all but they sure seem to be.
I have PCOS. One of the things that is brought up constantly with PCOS is that it is an inflammation response and we have higher than normal cortisol levels. At least this is what I've seen. I've been told to eat a diet that's Paleo/whole 30/ avoid carbs/avoid wheat and dairy as these trigger inflammation. And of course I see other stuff talking about cortisol and that stress causes us to have increased cortisol and therefore a harder time losing weight.
Moving on, I see so many videos regarding ADHD and attachment styles and Trauma responses. I have seen a therapist. She was not particularly helpful but essentially I have been told by my family and the therapist that I do have ADHD traits. For me this means I am drawn to chaotic things. My job is constant changing direction of my attention. I choose partners that are, lets call it, emotionally challenging.
I have an anxious attachment style, and people pleasing tendencies. These are things that I know I need to work on and find more appropriate ways to deal with life and relationships.
But guys, really, what if I fix the mental side and that's all that's keeping me from my goals?
I don't know. I just feel overwhelmed with the same words being brought up in videos and discussions and the header topics are those things up above. Maybe they're not connected at all but they sure seem to be.
3
Replies
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One thing that you might find helpful is to look up resources for improving your executive functioning - basically, improving how your brain does all the background sorting tasks. Deliberately focusing on improving these can be helpful for everyone, but these are the kinds of things that people with ADHD tend to struggle a lot with. The specific books I've used are aimed for use with children, but I'm sure there is stuff for adults too.
I haven't had the same struggles, but I did find that as an adult I gradually kept sorting a lot of things that were kind of dysfunctional and weird, and weight loss was the big one I saved for last because I found it the most intimidating. But after doing the other work, I won't say it was *easy,* but it was less hard than I expected. The skills I'd built in other areas transferred.3 -
ADHD can be the underlying cause of anxiety and depression due to the absence of enough dopamine. The theory is that we don't have enough dopamine receptors and with reduced hormones levels we get virtually nothing to cope with.
The link between raised cortisol, thyroid, anxiety, depression, ADHD, GI distress, weight gain and female hormones are all interlinked.There are dopamine, oestrogen and progesterone receptors in the gut so an imbalance can result in many symptoms.
It's been said our gut health is responsible for our wellbeing, the biome of good bacteria for the 'second brain' that sends signals via hormones to the rest of the body.
I am currently going through perimenopause, new ADHD stimulant medication and have Roemhelds Syndrome. My gut was very upset for 8 months along with reduced appetite, increased palpitations, dyspnea, rocketing anxiety/depression, a vastly decreased coping mechanism and what I thought was useless HRT medication.
Inflammation is a key factor so following a gluten/dairy/added sugar free diet with added strategic supplements is wise.
I take 'Better You' brand Daily Iron Spray, Magnesium Glycinate, Digestive Enzymes, Iron free Multi vitamin, Electrolytes and eat a low fibre elimination diet.
I can now take the double dose of ADHD meds without problems, HRT is amazing and my GI distress is now far better than it was.
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I taught school for many years and filled out many, many diagnostic ADHD inventory scales on students. Parents would bring the inventory scale to me and request that I complete it. I believe an inventory of symptoms is the only way to a medical diagnosis of ADHD. I saw myself in so many of the scale markers of ADHD characteristics. However, I was not formally diagnosed until I was almost 50 years old and suffering from depression. Basically, all my coping skills that I’d cultivated over the years in order to manage were no longer helping enough. I was resistant to starting medication but did because every aspect of my life had become difficult. Sleep became almost impossible because I couldn’t settle down to relax until I was beyond exhausted.
Prior to medication, I relied heavily on caffeine and sugar to keep me going. With medication, my old coping strategies became more effective again.
My dietary habits of 49 years though had led to yo-yo dieting with a ballooning weight. My body fat percent grew and my muscle mass shrank. Losing weight was almost impossible.
Fast forward to age 60 in 2020. I recommitted to getting healthy. It’s been a slow, uphill battle. Without the ADHD meds and therapy, I don’t think I could have been successful. It’s an uphill battle, but I’ve lost 50 pounds over the last few years and kept it off. My success has not been a straight line. I had several breaks along the way because logging every bite can get old, but I always get back to logging. Lastly, exercise is essential—especially for the ADHD brain. Find some things you can do every day in order to move. It will make your life so much easier if you take time to move and sweat.
It’s never too late to seek help and keep trying to find what you need to be successful.1 -
Thank you so much for the replies! I'm glad to know that I may be on to something and hearing your stories and ways you have managed these things is so inspiring for me! Thank you for sharing!0
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A lot of the therapy stuff on YouTube and popular culture has little practical use. Half the therapists out there are inappropriate or useless too. You get more oomph in your life through food and gym or exercise. It’s faster and guaranteed to work unlike the stuff you’ve read and been told by therapists or on YouTube.0
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