Depression, anxiety and grief.

rhonafranw7450
rhonafranw7450 Posts: 5 Member
in Sleep, Mindfulness and Overall Wellness
I have lost two of my near relatives in less than six months.
My mental health has never been great and I struggle with basic wellness. The voices in my head can be vile when I'm low (I'm not crazy I just have an inner monologue of hate towards myself)
As such I struggle with mindfulness as I can't get them to shut up....
What app, techniques, style would you recommend.

Replies

  • AnnofB
    AnnofB Posts: 3,588 Member
    May be time to have a conversation with your doctor. They aren't all pill pushers. And they can steer you toward the best course for you.

    Hoping you are feeling better soon.
  • eternalsummer
    eternalsummer Posts: 8 Member
    Meditation is a scary word for people, but I suggest checking it out. I'd had some mental health issues over the years and meditation was pretty much the only thing I thought was in my control to help myself. When I was younger I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder. I had some sort of psychosis episode, and somewhere in me I knew that I wasn't well, and that was where I started. I found my way back to myself not long after, so I didn't stop until my depression went into remission and it was a 180 change. If you want more advice on meditation feel free to ask :)
  • Sebismom
    Sebismom Posts: 44 Member
    Grief-induced anxiety can be profoundly destabilizing. If you can, read Claire Bidwell Smith’s book: Anxiety-the missing stage of grief. It may be that you are in an acute stage of grief and you need to speak with a therapist who specializes in grief/anxiety. Friends are wonderful, but they are not always the best outlet, nor do they often have the skills to help you through something like this. You need someone who can sincerely hold space for you and center your concerns. You may need to take an antidepressant for a time. A conversation with your primary care doctor might be the first step. As for apps, I like the Healthyminds Program app. It is run by a group doing research on mindfulness meditation. There are several that have that name. The one I have is entirely free and its icon is an hm. Best of luck. I have been there, am still there, but am also hopeful and love my self and my life at this point. I take things one day at a time.
  • avatiach
    avatiach Posts: 307 Member
    +1 to all the suggestions above--therapy, doctors, grief groups, meditation, volunteering... In addition, some things that helped me: Craniosacral massage. Regular massage. White noise while sleeping. Exercise. Hugs from people close to me.
  • Jamtalaban
    Jamtalaban Posts: 1 Member
    edited September 2023
    Some people find journaling to be therapeutic. Writing down your thoughts and feelings, even the negative ones, can be a way to process and release them. Breathing exercises can also be useful. Take a few minutes each day to focus on your breath, inhaling deeply and exhaling slowly. Additionally, don't hesitate to reach out to a mental health professional for support. Remember, your mental health is essential for your overall well-being. If things ever become too overwhelming, you can always contact the 24-hour mental health hotline for assistance.
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    edited September 2023
    I've struggled with mental health for at least a decade...looking back, the signs were there even further back, but they were more subtle. In that time I've been in and out of therapy...some of it helpful and some of it not (like anything else, there are good therapists and bad therapists). I've recently gotten back to therapy as I had a pretty down depression cycle towards the end of summer...most of my therapists have concluded that I don't suffer from chronic depression...one though perhaps generalized anxiety disorder (which is pretty vague).

    I'm really liking my new therapist...with my intake, and several batteries of testing and a few one on one therapy sessions she is highly confident that I am bipolar 2. She had come to about 90%+ confidence in this after all of my testing, but in my last session this past Tuesday I went in about as "high on life" as one can get. I was going on about how great I felt and I wasn't sure I needed to do this anymore and that the past week or so I had become super productive at work and home and was knocking tasks out left and right and planning this and planning that, etc...so therapy has worked and I don't need to do it anymore. She kind of looked at me and I was like, "what"? "You're in a hypomanic state right now," is what she said.

    She went on to explain that in our discussions over various sessions I had talked about certain events over the months and even last couple of years that she was able to easily identify as hypomanic where I identified them as being "normal" because not only was I not depressed, but I was euphoric in my mood for weeks on end. Apparently, that's not normal...who knew? She kind of explained it to me like...someone has a birthday or some special occasion that they're really excited about and the endorphins are going, etc...but as soon as the event is over, that person comes back down to "normal". Me on the other hand...kinda like it's Christmas for a month and then boom, depression crash.

    All this to say that if you're having mental health issues, seek treatment. I don't know how I really feel about my recent diagnosis other than this at least gives us a starting point to really start working with and that at minimum it makes these rollercoaster highs and lows (that make me feel like a crazy person) make sense. Without telling my wife the diagnosis I gave her the list of symptoms and how they may be acted out IRL (I drive her as crazy with this as it is crazy to me) and she was like, "what is this?" "This is totally you." I told her, bipolar 2. Not really sure what to do with it at the moment, but we'll figure it out I suppose.
  • Fuzzipeg
    Fuzzipeg Posts: 2,301 Member

    So few words to convey so very, very much. I'm so very sorry for your losses.

    The manor of their passing can be so very hard handle. Even if you have been expecting to loose someone, when it finally happens the hurt is savage. Then to loose a second person this cuts into your support system all the more. I wonder if there is any music the three of you enjoyed, or may be you might have liked to introduce one of the people to, with the help of the other. Possibly even something you would have liked to have shared with them both. Then play it, especially if its positive in attitude, try not to sit in silence. I've been known to blast out the speakers when the going gets tough. Try not to stay home alone. Try not to stay all alone, may be visit places you used to share, or they loved, be open to meeting others on outings, please try to get out. I generally say good morning or other appropriate greeting to people I pass in the street, shops or where ever I may be. This works two ways, they may be low too and a smile, even a shy one may make all the difference to them as well as you.

    Please take great care of yourself. You matter too. You can get through this so please seek help too
  • hildebark
    hildebark Posts: 3 Member
    To everyone who reached out to the OP, that was cool af. Compounded grief sucks (understatement), and this is such a caring community. Peace peeps.
  • agodsep545
    agodsep545 Posts: 2 Member
    I've been through depression, anxiety for years. My suggestion, is talk to someone...being in person, helps alot with mental health.

    My biggest suggestion, is disconnect yourself from News Media and Social Media. It shows us things that don't effect our personal lives, yet it gets in our thoughts and isn't helpfull. I haven't watch news in 2 years, and find my anxiety and mental health has become easier to handle. Like taking a deep breath and exhaling slowly.

    Love yourself...don't worry about what others think. If your happy with yourself, then don't change for others....but if it can cause health issues, then get up on that horse and try as hard as you can, no matter how many times you fall.

    I've had health issues, and crossed that healing line....so can you. Climbing over the obstacle and conquering it, is the best feeling ever. Be strong, like you were meant to be. Only cowards get cornored and take the easy way out of things. There is ALWAYS another way, but you need to work at it.

    Don't loose hope, sometimes asking for help, shows we are strong to limit, and just need a helping hand.
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    agodsep545 wrote: »
    I've been through depression, anxiety for years. My suggestion, is talk to someone...being in person, helps alot with mental health.

    My biggest suggestion, is disconnect yourself from News Media and Social Media. It shows us things that don't effect our personal lives, yet it gets in our thoughts and isn't helpfull. I haven't watch news in 2 years, and find my anxiety and mental health has become easier to handle. Like taking a deep breath and exhaling slowly.

    Love yourself...don't worry about what others think. If your happy with yourself, then don't change for others....but if it can cause health issues, then get up on that horse and try as hard as you can, no matter how many times you fall.

    I've had health issues, and crossed that healing line....so can you. Climbing over the obstacle and conquering it, is the best feeling ever. Be strong, like you were meant to be. Only cowards get cornored and take the easy way out of things. There is ALWAYS another way, but you need to work at it.

    Don't loose hope, sometimes asking for help, shows we are strong to limit, and just need a helping hand.

    Very good point about the news. I am normally a very large consumer of the news, but some times, such as now, I have to stay away from certain topics.

    I'm in a gardening group on Facebook which has strict rules about staying on topic, and it's a delight. It's by far the nicest social media group I've ever been in.

    Ok, sometimes there are passionate discussions about about pesticide use, but it's manageable :lol:

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