How did you start?

Kelly040404
Kelly040404 Posts: 21 Member
Hey guys,

How did you all start on your weight loss journey? I’m getting so emotional and frustrated! I can’t seem to stick to anything! I’ll get it in my head to do low carb and wait for my appetite to naturally decrease and end up eating less = weight loss. But, I end up feeling deprived and go off it on day 4 😭. I try calorie restriction, then I toss in the towel the moment I remember how long it’s gonna take to lose this weight. I know I shouldn’t expect fast, but how do you all do it? 😭 I have 3 kids. Nobody in my family or at my work is dieting - I feel surrounded my temptation. Our kitchen is being renovated - so no working stove and we’ve been ordering take out for 2 weeks. I know I didn’t cook the food so my diary can’t be that accurate.

How do you keep going? How do you stay consistent? I’m an emotional eater and home life and work life is stressful right now. I just want to eat cake and ice cream! Lol

I see a pic of myself and I’m disgusted. My kids like to take those lovely “candid” photos and laugh. 😭

I’ll probably delete this post, lol, but if anyone feels like reaching out to me, please do! Maybe just typing this all out will help me.

Thank you all 🥺
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Replies

  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,961 Member
    It's much easier once you create the habit. And that takes 21 days of consistency. It's like changing the time you wake up. You may not get used to it the first week, but once your body does it consistently for 21 days, you adapt.
    DO NOT do a full 180. If you were my client, I'd pick one or two things to scale back first. Whether it's dessert or just reducing your total portion in a meal. Then in a couple of weeks, add something else.
    Yes you have temptation around you. That's where you have to REALLY WANT to do this. Post reminders on your mirror, fridge and sun visor so you always have something to keep you on path.
    As for eating out right now, look for the lower calorie options.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 35+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

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  • ballad07doubts
    ballad07doubts Posts: 2 Member
    It’s ok to feel discouraged and frustrated…not having a functioning kitchen as you begin this process must be super stressful and a big pain.

  • ballad07doubts
    ballad07doubts Posts: 2 Member
    …I hit send before I finished!

    There are so many of us that feel overwhelmed by this process—you are not alone. Focus on small steps for now, especially because your life is chaotic.
  • Dellagirl5316
    Dellagirl5316 Posts: 24 Member
    “Just Keep swimming” Dory
  • BronwynJacobi
    BronwynJacobi Posts: 1 Member
    I had to make changes (refuse to call it a “diet”) because my arthritis was progressing due to weight affecting joints. And we were going south for the winter-I’ve gained weight every winter since I retired. So I made a few life changes. I quit soda pop, even diet. No fried food. No mayo, ketchup, or bottled salad dressing. After that, I started using MFP more consistently, and started counting calories. I really noticed the macros, especially sodium and cholesterol. So my most recent change has been limiting processed food. When we go out to eat, I check out the menu beforehand, check the nutrition/calories if the restaurant website has one, (or use MFP). I make my choices and log it onto the food diary before I get to the restaurant. And since it’s not a diet (it’s a life change!) I don’t worry about how long it will take. I also take a meal (not a whole day) off once in awhile (Hello pizza night!). I could tell a difference on my joints after the first 10 pounds. My advice is make small changes at first. Good luck!
  • Kelly040404
    Kelly040404 Posts: 21 Member
    Don't give up! I was living in the suburbs, married to my soulmate, and had the best life.
    Then My wife gets killed by a drunk driver and I get cancer. At first, I ate constantly to escape reality. Then I had a couple of years of chemo and a stem cell transplant. I wanted to give up and end it all. With lots of help and support, I finally felt better. What a roller coaster. Started at 212 and was 158 this morning. So no matter how bad you think it is hang on, you can do this, I'm sure of it.

    Thank you so much! I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved wife - and a cancer diagnosis on top of that! I myself am I cancer survivor - 3 years out. I think a lot of my weight gain has been from depression from that and the meds I'm on. I just recently weaned off my anti-depressant in hopes that might help with weight loss. (I've put on 70 lbs since chemo). You are a perfect example of someone who faced such tragedy and pushed through! I was just telling my girls last night about how in life we can face some terrible circumstances, but we just have to keep going and eventually we overcome it. When I'm down, I remind myself that "this is just a moment in time". Thank you for sharing and congratulations on your wonderful success! Keep kicking butt! 😊
  • Kelly040404
    Kelly040404 Posts: 21 Member
    I had to make changes (refuse to call it a “diet”) because my arthritis was progressing due to weight affecting joints. And we were going south for the winter-I’ve gained weight every winter since I retired. So I made a few life changes. I quit soda pop, even diet. No fried food. No mayo, ketchup, or bottled salad dressing. After that, I started using MFP more consistently, and started counting calories. I really noticed the macros, especially sodium and cholesterol. So my most recent change has been limiting processed food. When we go out to eat, I check out the menu beforehand, check the nutrition/calories if the restaurant website has one, (or use MFP). I make my choices and log it onto the food diary before I get to the restaurant. And since it’s not a diet (it’s a life change!) I don’t worry about how long it will take. I also take a meal (not a whole day) off once in awhile (Hello pizza night!). I could tell a difference on my joints after the first 10 pounds. My advice is make small changes at first. Good luck!

    Thank you! Funny - I was just asking my dad for his weight loss advice yesterday. He was giving me a few tips and out of everything he said, I circled in on the "cut out the mayo and ranch dressing". He also gave up diet coke - and doesn't use salt anymore. Unbelievable to me because he would salt his food SO MUCH - when he'd pick his plate up off the table, there'd be a ring of salt around his plate! And hey, I can't wait to lose my first 10 lbs - my joints are killing me! Congrats on finding what works for you and thank you for the awesome advice! 😊
  • mlrtri
    mlrtri Posts: 425 Member
    edited July 2023

    Thank you! Funny - I was just asking my dad for his weight loss advice yesterday. He was giving me a few tips and out of everything he said, I circled in on the "cut out the mayo and ranch dressing". He also gave up diet coke - and doesn't use salt anymore.

    I gave up Diet Coke as well. I know many people still drink it or other Diet drinks and lose weight. I decided to stop and I am happy I did. And now that I look back I think it (Diet Coke) made me more hungry. It could be in my head and I am not saying this is a truth for everyone. But it is my truth. It could also be contributed to other things. But I don’t see a con to giving it up. At the very least I have saved money not buying it 😀.

    Condiments were something I adjusted very quickly after I started logging. I would log a wonderful meal and then add in the condiments and watch my calorie count go way up. Then I had a period of time when I tried to avoid all things high calorie. But I am now adding in healthy fats like nuts and avocados. They are higher calorie but they are important. It is a learning process.
  • mlrtri
    mlrtri Posts: 425 Member
    I try calorie restriction, then I toss in the towel the moment I remember how long it’s gonna take to lose this weight. I know I shouldn’t expect fast, but how do you all do it?

    It is very overwhelming to think about the length of time it will take to get to your goal weight. However, you do start to look and feel better long before you get to the ultimate goal. I am not at my goal but my appearance has improved and I have so much more energy. I try to focus on just improving every month. And eventually I will hit my goal.
  • ldaltonbishop
    ldaltonbishop Posts: 98 Member
    When I was thirty-one I realized I had gained two pounds over the last year. Just two pounds. I thought that wasn't too bad. Then I did the math and realized if I gained just two pounds a year over the next fifty years, it would add up to a hundred pounds. So, sometimes just not gaining is a small victory.

    When I did start to get serious about my weight, I switched to a salad plate instead of a full dinner plate. It didn't take as much food to make it look full. When I got really serious about health, I tried to let half the plate be full of leafy greens or lower-carb vegetables. And walking, just adding a thirty-minute walk most days, really can make a difference.

    You can do this. Set small goals, but also think of long-term benefits.
  • PaisleyJen
    PaisleyJen Posts: 4 Member
    As everyone has said pick a small sustainable change for me this time I will start in the same place my last success started. Log my food get an honest and truthful view of what I actually eat. And I will get 10k steps a day in 2 weeks I will look at it all pick the next step. It will likely be meal prep and possibly adding more dynamic cardio but I will cross that bridge when I get there. Give yourself grace and forgive mistakes realize that 80% improvement will create a change.
  • yirara
    yirara Posts: 9,906 Member
    let me tell you how I started: I complained that I'm not eating too much, and hence there's no reason for me to be overweight. Yeah, only eating about 1300 calories per day, thus something must be wrong.

    And then I really tracked, and realized I was indeed not eating too much. Apart from the bag of crisps, or the whole pack of hard candy, etc.. that I had several times per week. :D

    What others have said: keep it simple. Don't deprive yourself of any food unless you really don't manage to eat less of it. Eat what you like. Make small changes. If keto or low carb makes you unhappy then don't do it. It's not for everyone. If 'diet food x' makes you unhappy then don't eat it. Look at your diary and see what makes you happy, and whether you could do with a bit less of it, or a bit more and eat less of something else. There's really no need for drastic, immediate changes as weight loss is not fast anyway. You can do this!
  • Kelly040404
    Kelly040404 Posts: 21 Member
    edited July 2023
    You guys are so nice to comment back! Thank you all so much!!! 🥹 I'm so emotional, like I said in my original post, that I'm sitting here all teary eyed! I love reading everyone's experience and what helped them. I love the idea of walking more to earn calories - or eating a bit less one day to save for a big dinner. That way you can enjoy a meal out with the fam and not worry so much about it, obviously still picking a healthier option, but I mean not obsessing about maybe enjoying a slice of bread or a roll with dinner. Or, having a dessert with your meal. That makes it more sustainable for me. And Diet Coke increasing appetite - I'll have to see how I feel when I try to limit it and maybe even cut it out completely. Right now, I'm a total addict! Tracking and being honest about what I'm eating is indeed a huge eye opener. This morning for instance - I had 2 poptarts and coffee with cream. Hello 505 calories. Add in my typical lunch out (maybe Jimmy Johns - 900 calories there) and then whatever we get for dinner - sometimes Chinese food - and then some ice cream before bed. YIKES! I don't even wanna think about how many calories I've been ingesting without tracking! 😂
  • mlrtri
    mlrtri Posts: 425 Member
    Just being aware of what you are consuming is a great start. The future you will be so glad you started and struggled through the frustration. Someone mentioned above to give yourself grace. Remember to do that. We all have off days. We have more going on in our life than just working on losing weight. But by tracking daily it ensures that one off day does not grow into more. And by NOT having hard core rules to follow you don’t throw in the towel when you have broken one. You are on the right track.

    You said those around you aren’t working to lose weight. But maybe you will be an inspiration to someone.

    I was also a hard core Diet Coke drinker. I never thought I could quit. But it wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be. And I found that by not going into the gas station and grabbing a Diet Coke I also avoided the candy or snacks that were waiting for me there. I am not saying you have to do it. But if you decide you want to I know you can. Because I did and I can almost guarantee I consumed as much and probably more than you every day.

    Congrats, by the way, on taking the first step by deciding to work on your health.
  • Jthanmyfitnesspal
    Jthanmyfitnesspal Posts: 3,522 Member
    I start by pointing out that your body is doing exactly what it has evolved to do: eat more than you need and store extra energy for later use. Our ancestors survived by doing just that, so it is basic to our existence. Our ability to have high body fat is our superpower, not our downfall, generally. And, having too much food available is an unusual problem, historically speaking. Our ancestors would have been thrilled. Our genetic code compels us to over eat to one extent or another, depending on the individual.

    Cut yourself some slack. You are doing what you are meant to do!

    The urge to over eat can only be overridden by your rational mind. Whenever there are distractions (as with being a parent and/or professional), your rational mind is occupied, so you follow your instincts.

    There are some techniques that can help:

    - Calorie counting (using MFP)
    - Timed eating (so-called intermittent fasting), where you only eat in an 8 hour window of the day
    - Low-carb, paleo, or other restrictive diets
    - Planning all meals in advance, bringing your lunch to work
    - Joining a weight loss group (meeting in-person is best)
    - Joining an exercise group
    - Dietician, life coach, psychotherapy, personal training

    For extreme cases:

    - Drug therapies (Ozempic)
    - Bariatric reduction surgery
  • MurphmomSparkles
    MurphmomSparkles Posts: 208 Member
    I am only a couple of weeks in so take it with a grain of salt, LOL. I was recommended by a healthcare professional I am seeing to increase my protein and water to start with. I don't know that there is a magic number for those, but I think it is helping to focus on what I am trying to do instead of what I am trying NOT to do. I chose the slowest weight loss on MFP of 0.5 lb per week and 30% protein. It is very challenging for me to try to get the protein, and I know I can't absorb it all in one sitting, so I am eating (or having a protein drink) about 5-6 times a day. That helps me feel less panicky that I will get too hungry and overeat.

    I quickly learned I can't have that much carbs or it throws the percentage off, but I am not focusing on that. I am having a lot less mood swings and cravings, and not feeling deprived so far. I am also being kind to myself if I don't make the goal because this going to take me a while. However, I would like to make as many small steps forward as possible since it is going to take time. For those used to snacking a lot on sweets it might be a helpful way to start.
  • MurphmomSparkles
    MurphmomSparkles Posts: 208 Member
    I tell myself, 'I would like to have those cookies, but I need to get my protein up so I'll have string cheese for now," or "I would like to have diet soda but I need to get my water up so I'll have that for now."

    Trying to build the muscle memory to make those different choices.
  • Kelly040404
    Kelly040404 Posts: 21 Member
    edited July 2023
    I tell myself, 'I would like to have those cookies, but I need to get my protein up so I'll have string cheese for now," or "I would like to have diet soda but I need to get my water up so I'll have that for now."

    Trying to build the muscle memory to make those different choices.

    You know the trick I have before was tell myself I’m going to drink a gallon of water a day. If I want a Diet Coke, I can’t have it until after I finish my gallon of water. Most days it would be late at night by the time I’d hit that water goal that I no longer wanted that Diet Coke. Good way to get my water in!
  • lynn_glenmont
    lynn_glenmont Posts: 10,089 Member
    When I started, I found that focusing on protein and fiber helped keep me satiated so that at least I wasn't hungry, even if I still occasionally craved things I didn't have room for that day in my calorie budget (I dealt with that most of the time by promising myself to make room another day -- but sometimes I just ate the thing and accepted that it would eat into my deficit for the week).

    As for exercising, when I started I just tried to build more movement into my daily life (getting off the subway a stop or two early, or walking to a farther one before boarding, and turning on music and dancing around the living room in the evening for 15 minutes when I would have been watching television).

    You don't say how old your kids are, but if they're young enough that you need to spend a lot of time watching them, maybe you could turn some of their play time into "play with Mom" time, so that you're getting physical activity too.
  • Rockymountainflyer
    Rockymountainflyer Posts: 26 Member
    When I started, I logged calories, analyzed what foods filled me up and came as close as possible to my allotted calories but allowed myself indulgences. I walked every day, even just around the house or yard or walmart. I also bought 39 cent spiral notebooks during the school sales and had one for each month. The first page I put things like "love yourself, not food! Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels! You can DO it!" Etc. Then every day I'd put my to do list and a few thoughts. It helped. I lost 25 pounds the first year and 13 this year. This year I am paying more attention to fiber, protein, nutrients. It is a lifestyle, not a diet. You can DO this lol!
  • Dean_IsStayinLean
    Dean_IsStayinLean Posts: 75 Member
    Substract pop tarts - add yogurt. :)

    We're really glad you're here. It just takes a few changes and a few new habits to get the needle moving in the right direction. After that, the "little wins" are pretty motivating and will tell you that YOU CAN DO THIS.

  • Kelly040404
    Kelly040404 Posts: 21 Member
    When I started, I logged calories, analyzed what foods filled me up and came as close as possible to my allotted calories but allowed myself indulgences. I walked every day, even just around the house or yard or walmart. I also bought 39 cent spiral notebooks during the school sales and had one for each month. The first page I put things like "love yourself, not food! Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels! You can DO it!" Etc. Then every day I'd put my to do list and a few thoughts. It helped. I lost 25 pounds the first year and 13 this year. This year I am paying more attention to fiber, protein, nutrients. It is a lifestyle, not a diet. You can DO this lol!

    Thank you!!! I also buy notebooks to jot down recipes, or my measurements and weight and the date, etc. I’m a visual person and doing that helps! 🙂
  • Kelly040404
    Kelly040404 Posts: 21 Member
    _Deano_ wrote: »
    Substract pop tarts - add yogurt. :)

    We're really glad you're here. It just takes a few changes and a few new habits to get the needle moving in the right direction. After that, the "little wins" are pretty motivating and will tell you that YOU CAN DO THIS.

    Haha thank you! Baby steps in the right direction! 😊
  • neanderthin
    neanderthin Posts: 10,201 Member
    edited August 2023
    For me, it was a family friend that's also a Doctor that runs his own lifestyle clinic and deals mostly with people with metabolic symptom, obesity, diabetes that kind of thing, and got on my case because my weight was in his words "getting out of hand" I was 245 at the time and now I'm 185. I've always been active, play hockey about 10 months of the year, still do and workout and have for donkeys years but my A1C apparently had been creeping up and when I got to him it was 5.6 which is within the normal range but 5.7 is insulin resistant, so, so much for a number. I also had a few health issues mostly joint pain, stomach which many would describe as IBS type, and some skin annoyances like dry skin, rashes that kind of thing.

    Did the usual blood work but I was also given an oral glucose tolerance test OGTT and that pretty much told the story. I've been brought up in an era and a time where whole foods cooked at home was the norm and rarely had any "junk food" but I've always had a sweet tooth and when I finally set up shop away from my parents the years of desserts and junky sweet foods finally caught up to me.

    He assigned a low carb diet and after about 3 months I adjusted very well, and that's been my lifestyle change that significantly changed my overall health. Understanding my carbohydrate tolerance was key from the OGTT and over time my insulin sensitive increased quite a bit and was able to tolerate more carbs and would fuel workouts with extra carbs and basically don't have a problem when social or other times arise where consuming a boatload of carbs on a particular day effected me. The one rule that I never sway away from is if I get out of line I never follow it up with the next day of the same behavior. We're all going consume foods that we feel we shouldn't, but as long as you identify that, and not continue, and get back on the plan the next day I consider that normal. Also being low carb I promote and recommend a whole food diet, because that's basically what it is, but that can be interpreted as only whole foods and it's not just whole food, as I've described so it's important to recognize dogma in whatever strategy you decide to employ, intermittent fasting is another one that people feel is useless but of course it isn't for the people that are successful doing it and there will always be plenty of people tells other people they're doing it wrong, funny how that works.

    It doesn't have to be low carb obviously, that just my story and can be any lifestyle change that works for you. I believe if a person feels satiated and doesn't require extreme measures to facilitate hemostasis then you might be on to something. It's finding it that's problematic and people don't like much change in the foods they've grown to love to eat, mind you I still eat desserts, just not very much and not 2 days in a row. Cheers
  • zebasschick
    zebasschick Posts: 1,067 Member
    i started by only changing 1 thing - i replaced many foods with the lower-calorie versions. for example, instead of giving up ice cream, i moved to light ice cream; regular yogurt to dannon light & fit at 80 calories per cup (cherry is my fave followed by vanilla), fat free milk (some taste much better than others!), found a variety of lighter foods by experimenting, and i lost 60 pounds over a year or so.

    then i started doing short but continual walks - no stopping in the middle to chat or waiting for a dog to pee). 10 minutes 3x a day. when i was able comfortably, i either upped my 10 minute walks to 5 per day or walked 15 minutes 3x a day.

    from there, i found MFP and started calorie counting. i started by logging for a week to get an idea of how many calories i was eating.