Hi from the (not so) newbie ...

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TheBookDragon
TheBookDragon Posts: 5 Member
in Introduce Yourself
Hi,

I have been on this site a number of times over the last 12 years, but this time it is very different ...

I recently became a widow (January 2023) & over the last 17 months I have pretty much forgotten about myself & basically let myself go; I have gained 8 stone (112lb) lost all my fitness to a point where I feel breathless going up the stairs & I am permanently exhausted.

In the last 17 months I have become a widow, become a grandma & turned 50, so it's been a year of changes & an emotional rollercoaster, so in all the changes I just forgot about myself on all levels.

I'm now at a point I am looking for a job (I had to give up my job last year following my hubby's death) & I am ready to work on myself & get some sort of life back because ultimately I am still alive & I cannot live my life mourning the loss of my precious husband, he would not want me to do that & I feel now that I am actually insulting his memory by just stagnating.

So it's time to move forward & start to live again ... I am 50 years young, I have a granddaughter to watch grow up & I still have plenty of life in me to get a new job & be a functional member of society.

Replies

  • annliz23
    annliz23 Posts: 3,478 Member
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    I wish you all the best
  • sherryrichie
    sherryrichie Posts: 114 Member
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    Best of luck on your new journey. It’s so very difficult to lose your spouse, but like you said, you can begin to move on and in a new direction and leave the stagnation behind. He would be proud of you.
  • capgordon3040
    capgordon3040 Posts: 48 Member
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    Hope the best for u
  • TheBookDragon
    TheBookDragon Posts: 5 Member
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    annliz23 wrote: »
    I wish you all the best

    Thank you so much ❤️
  • TheBookDragon
    TheBookDragon Posts: 5 Member
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    sherryrichie wrote: »
    Best of luck on your new journey. It’s so very difficult to lose your spouse, but like you said, you can begin to move on and in a new direction and leave the stagnation behind. He would be proud of you.

    Thank you for your kind words - they mean a lot ❤️
  • TheBookDragon
    TheBookDragon Posts: 5 Member
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    capgordon3040 wrote: »
    Hope the best for u

    Thanks & the same to you too 👍
  • CGoodrich74
    CGoodrich74 Posts: 2 Member
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    My heart goes out to you. Life can be really tough sometimes. I am an empath and a great listener. I felt like I needed to reach out to you. Keep your head up. You are a strong woman. I also hear ya on the 50 thing. lol I will be hitting that age this fall. 😱 I’m just a message away if needed. Sorry if this sounds creepy. 😂😂😂
  • craftysloth85
    craftysloth85 Posts: 20 Member
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    I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your partner. That must be really difficult to deal with and feeling bad about your weight can't help. Lots of life changes, hey? Looks like you're making some positive decisions though and navigating this new path in your life in an admirable way. Sending all the well wishes on your journey. I'll toss you a follow - feel free to do the same!
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 32,884 Member
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    I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. Each person's experience is different, of course, but I was widowed at age 42 myself. It's a dislocating experience.

    I feel that you're absolutely doing the right thing with committing to find a new path forward. I think you're exactly right that that's what a loving spouse would want for the survivor. I don't know your exact circumstances, but my husband's death was an illness, so we actually talked about this, and I think that helped me. It still took a bit of time to reorient, though.

    There can be much happiness ahead for you, I'm certain, especially with that new granddaughter in the picture.

    Wishing you health and happiness!

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