Can anyone introduce me to this person ... Will Power?

Welcome to the Community side!

Speaking as a hedonistic aging-hippie flake, I'm not a huge believer in will power. Just being real, I don't have a big budget of willpower, discipline, or anything in that realm. I can use my limited budget (when I have some!) to try some manageable small improvement, and make it a habit if it works well for me. Then I can just keep practicing that one, until another manageable improvement seems achievable.

That may be a slow boat, but it works better for me than trying to revolutionize everything all at once, so it's more successful overall.

One thing I'd strongly encourage is to think of how to make a plan that's relatively easier, rather than trying to make it faster. That's a very different mindset. I decided I wasn't going to do anything to lose weight that I wasn't willing to continue forever in order to stay at a healthy weight, except for a sensibly moderate calorie deficit I could continue until I reached goal weight.

Once I got to goal weight (2016), I already had a set of routine activity and eating habits that could continue almost on autopilot when other parts of life got complicated. All I needed to do was add back calories to reach maintenance calories. (I even did that rather gradually, because - knowing myself - I wanted to add small tweaks to my routine that were enjoyable, rather than creating a habit of eating a giant slice of cake or something every day. )

I want to pull out one sub-thought there: Getting good day-in, day-out habits is IMO the key piece. That one very rare day when I eat a hearty slice of someone's birthday cake, or work out for 5 hours (!) . . . those are a drop in the ocean. The ocean is the routine, repeated, frequent habits. That's most important.

Implication: If you have an off day during loss, don't beat yourself up. Log the stuff you actually eat - even if you're not happy about it. Just give some thought to whether you can revise your plan in some pretty-easy way to avoid repeating the off day, if it wasn't worth the extra calories. Spend maybe 10 minutes at most thinking about that, and rehearsing the new plan vividly in your head like a mini-movie so it sticks. Then just get back on your improved plan ASAP and go on with life. An off day isn't a personal failure, it's a learning opportunity . . . really.

Maybe this isn't you, but a thing we see here a lot is people who try to lose weight fast, think they need to adopt some alien-to-them tricksy named diet they can't enjoy, and then maybe stack a bunch of punitively intense daily exercise on top of that. They don't last long here, at least in posts. I hope they succeeded and went onto long term health and happiness, but the number of "I'm back" posts in Introductions makes me doubtful.

Personally, I don't think weight loss or fitness improvement need to be miserable, punitive experiences. That would imply that being overweight or less fit are sins we need to expiate by suffering. I don't believe that's true, don't believe that's necessary, even think it's counter-productive . . . not to mention that it feels icky, and who likes feeling icky? 🤷 😉

I think the approach of extreme eating restrictions and unpleasant exercise is almost a recipe for yo-yo loss and gain, with rare exceptions. IME, most of the people I see here in the Community who have been long-term successful (loss then long-term maintenance, maybe fitness improvement) are more boring than that .

A few people do benefit from a specialized eating approach that works well for them, and some work their way up to a more intense exercise routine they actually enjoy. Many successful people just log their food, tweak their eating habits toward appropriate calories and improved nutrition in manageable steps, eating foods they personally enjoy, plus find affordable/practical; and perhaps find ways of moving more (daily life stuff or exercise) that ideally are fun, but that at minimum are tolerable and practical.

That last is what I mean by being "boring". Our friends aren't impressed by those ideas, probably don't even believe that would work . . . but it definitely can.

(For me, a perplexing but amusing point late in my weight loss was getting in an argument at dinner with an acquaintance who'd known me all through weight loss, and who mostly saw me at repeated meals with a group of others over that time. Her argument was that for women our age, there was no way to lose weight without going low carb, because she "had read all the books over the Winter, and they all said that". As far as I know from looking, and from what she said, she hadn't lost any weight. My argument was that what I'd done over the Winter was continue losing - quite a few tens of pounds - while eating quite a few carbs, and she'd seen it happen, including seeing me eat. She refused to believe it could work. )

I'm not saying my specific approach is perfect for everyone, because I think no one thing works best for everyone.

I do, though, believe that experimenting and finding one's own personal easiest, most sustainable path is a critical success factor. I think as long as we keep experimenting, find those habits, practice them, we can succeed. Only giving up the effort results in actual failure. Patient persistence can work.

Best wishes: IME, the improved quality of life results are more than worth the effort!

I happen to believe will power is real and can be increased incrementally through steady small bits of exercise. For example, my weakness is donuts; I can increase will power by walking past the bakery section of the grocery store, close enough to smell them, and keep on walking. When that becomes easier to do without grumping inside, I can walk close enough to see them and then walk away. Over time I have gotten to where I can walk right up to the tray, stare down for several seconds, and still walk away. Usually. 😅