Ugh I feel lost

This past 5 years have been so exhausting. First I lost my job in 2020. Months later I developed some less then healthy habits with drugs and alcohol thanks to my ex. It wasn't long before he became abusive and I literally lost all self confidence. Well I escaped him but not with much intact. It's now 2023 and I'm still without permanent work, battling addiction and basically homeless and 50lbs heavier than my average weight which was also too high for my height. Things became increasingly difficult when my mom had a sudden stroke that almost killed her and left her needing full time care. At first she was in a nursing home but after witnessing multiple examples of negligence I decided to take her home and care for her. We live in a 1 bedroom subsidized housing apartment and survive on minimal income. Anyways, I don't have much room or time for myself and food is the only thing I get to enjoy throughout the day. I'm sober now but u might say my dopamine pathways are messed up. I have next to no motivation but I know I need change. I need to care for myself and find myself again.