Please, tell me there is someone out there who understands?

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2

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  • illusions
    illusions Posts: 1
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    Wow did I right that or did you!! I have the same problem with staying the course...if I fall just one day, it seems to take me on a month long binge and I'm right back where I started. Recently I find that if I surround myself with as much positive influence on eating clean and exercise... the better. I constantly carry something with me, such as Oxygen Magazine or Muscle &Fitness...anything that keeps me focused on staying healthy. It has really helped me with my impulse cravings because my mind is on what I just read and having real women with the same "human" natured issues helps me to realize that..."I'm not the only one"!

    ...personally I have to remind myself, literally EVERYDAY that if I fall to get right back up. Sometimes are worst critiques is ourselves. Like you, I put alot of pressure on myself and when I fall I place alot of guilt and shame on myself. The key is consistancy and always moving forward, even if its just a tiny step forward...in the end it will be Huge and we will meet our goals!

    Stay positive and take it step by step.....You'll get there...We'll get there!!
  • annabgray
    annabgray Posts: 22
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    working with Buddies is key! Remember Rome was not built in a day and you have to remember everyday what is your WHY??? WHY do you want to lose the weight, is it because of your kids, your family, you want to fit into a certain size no matter what, whatever your WHY is Post that everywhere or create an appt in your phone that will alert you everyday. But don't quit no matter what.
  • nerdyandilikeit
    nerdyandilikeit Posts: 2,185 Member
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    First off, welcome to MyFitnessPal. Not sure if you've been here before, or you meant you have dieted before.

    I can understand your frustration and fear. If you need to cry, go cry. No shame in that (or calories). Unfortunately, there is nothing magic I, or anyone else can say to keep you on track, making healthy decisions.

    But here is a start. Here is what I suggest you do. You have to commit to logging EVERYTHING. I don't care if you binge tomorrow morning with breakfast pie and have donuts for dinner. Log it and (optionally) keep your food diary open. Just. Make. Sure. It. Gets. Entered.

    Do that for now. Get in the habit of logging everything. If it goes in your mouth, enter it in your food diary. Do that for a week. Only that. Then start introducing other changes.

    Good luck.

    This is exactly how I started. I ate what I normally ate, and logged every bit of it. I got the number shock of seeing how bad I ate, and started making little changes.

    I'm still making little changes. I have a list of healthy dinner recipes (that I change out when I get bored of one) and I rotate between them every week. It makes it a no-brainer after you get the hang of cooking the recipes, and you can save them as recipes or meals as you go along. The recipes and meals are HUGE to making the logging less daunting. At least for me.

    I eat the same thing for breakfast every day (but only because I like it) and basically the same thing for lunch (with tiny variations like types of cheese or mustard or deli meat).

    I have Fun Food Friday every week, which is when my roomie and I pick something we've been craving that's not good for us and go a little crazy at dinner. It keeps my sanity, which is very important for me.

    Really, just start with the logging everything and go from there. It's the thing that made this getting healthy journey click for me, FINALLY! :)
  • kellie182
    kellie182 Posts: 9
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    also learnt to feel happy for your achievements to cause I bet there have been at least a couple days or so you have done well or gone for a walk
  • PinkKareBear
    PinkKareBear Posts: 21
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    It's all about your attitude! Don't look at it as a diet. If you do, it'll probably end up like every other time, and when you lose the weight, you'll end up gaining it back. Look at it as a complete lifestyle change--a decision to be healthy for the rest of your life. This doesn't mean you have to give up the foods you love, but have them in moderation and within your calories! You enjoy them SO much more when they end up being a treat and not a constant! Everybody slips up and eats more than they should once in a while. But if you think of it as a lifestyle change, you can't fail! There are no time limits. You pick being healthy right back up. You're doing this first to be healthy, and second to lose weight.
  • fdonhauser
    fdonhauser Posts: 17
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    Yes I also agree...I know I struggle with compulsive overeating, and EVERY day I fight the urge to binge. Again, you are NOT alone.

    Reading books about this or therapy may help. the woman above also mentioned an author that she likes....I haven't read that author but I have read books by Geneen Roth (who wrote "If you're gonna eat at the fridge, pull up a chair). This author is realistic...there were times when I read her book that I thought "Oh my god, she totally knows how I am!!" She has changed how I think about food and eating (many times a day I repeat this to myself when I'm tempted to eat "Do you really want to eat this more than you want to be thin?").
    Yes, maybe you may not ever be "thin", but its all up to you. You are the only one that has control over what you do...but know that you have plenty of support here!
  • cynusps
    cynusps Posts: 72 Member
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    I know what you mean. I used to do the same thing. Fall off for what seemed to be no good reason and eat everything in sight. What has helped me the most is logging what I eat on this website. I still fall off some but not as bad and not as long. it has taken me 8 months to lose 30 lbs. That almost is discouraging but it is still better. So I keep going. Every now and then someone will mention I have lost weight and that helps me to say OK I can do this.

    Hang in there. You are not alone. Just do one day at a time (this is FAA, Food Addicts Anonymous), just kidding. But that is the best way. If you have a bad day, just try again the next day. It will work.

    You can do it. :happy:
  • sweetiebelle
    sweetiebelle Posts: 332 Member
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    Get that *kitten* out of your house! Don't buy it! Instead of candy bars replace them with fiber one bars. Don't fry BAKE! You can do this! We are here to help each other. We all have problem controlling our food that's why im here.
  • sassyntat2ed
    sassyntat2ed Posts: 39
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    I was where you are for a long time and recently I just made up my mind that this time I was gonna do it. I set a goal for myself and am keeping to it!! feel free to add me as a friend. I will encourage you any way I can! You CAN do it!!!
  • MochaMixAZ
    MochaMixAZ Posts: 844 Member
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    I just want it to be over. Meaning, I want to be thin and never have to worry about it. Is there such a thing?

    I can only speak from my personal experience, and for me: It's never over. It is a daily, sometimes hourly, need to make conscious decisions to stay in the healthy-lane. I realize that may not be what you want to hear, but it's my reality. It doesn't get easier, I don't "forget" to eat, I still don't truly enjoy exercising, it hasn't become a habit... but the benefits far outweigh taking the easy route. Not every day, but most days.

    As for perfection - I hear your desire, but... I've never found a way to achieve it. I strive for eating well more often than not.

    I hope I don't sound pessimistic. I prefer optimistic realist.

    It DOES pay off. But some days just... well... suck.
  • wutamunkee
    wutamunkee Posts: 440 Member
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    First off, welcome to MyFitnessPal. Not sure if you've been here before, or you meant you have dieted before.

    I can understand your frustration and fear. If you need to cry, go cry. No shame in that (or calories). Unfortunately, there is nothing magic I, or anyone else can say to keep you on track, making healthy decisions.

    But here is a start. Here is what I suggest you do. You have to commit to logging EVERYTHING. I don't care if you binge tomorrow morning with breakfast pie and have donuts for dinner. Log it and (optionally) keep your food diary open. Just. Make. Sure. It. Gets. Entered.

    Do that for now. Get in the habit of logging everything. If it goes in your mouth, enter it in your food diary. Do that for a week. Only that. Then start introducing other changes.

    Good luck.

    ALL of the above... well said... in fact, its quoteworthy :p

    Just know, and SEE all the people who have been there, and yes, I bet we alll visit that evil place once in a while STILL... but start making SMALL changes... you have to make a lifestyle change or you will never be where you want to be... you can diet and then go back to your old ways to gain it back and then some... but you have to do small changes, one at a time, control ONE BITE, ONE MEAL, ONE HOUR, ONE DAY at a time... I know it seems overwhelming, but you CAN do this!

    We are all here for you!

    Best of luck!
  • truecaligirl
    truecaligirl Posts: 132 Member
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    I know what you mean. I've been there done that and here I am now. Still have a ways to go but thanks to MFP i'm on the right path. You can totally do this. Food is just like a drug ...you need to detox. Start by making better choices ...learn to read nutrition labels and try to always go for the better choice...sometimes the taste is not all there but sometimes you get used to it. Also exercise and drink lots of water. Do this for 3 weeks straight and you will see that soon it will come to you naturally. Believe me ...it wasn't easy for any of us on here. YOU CAN DO THIS!!! Good Luck!
  • arosmith79
    arosmith79 Posts: 250 Member
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    I completely understand. I was in the same boat just like you when I started. I saw all the success stories, and with all of my past failures I figured this would just be one more to add to the list. The one thing that let me see things differently was all the support I found here. People let me know I wasn't going to be perfect all the time, and it was ok to have a bad day once in a while. You are only human and can't be expected to be perfect all the time. I think I overate because I was anticipating failure and it was just easier to give up early instead of trying hard and then failing and being disappointed yet again.

    And no, it doesn't change when you do. The change comes with time and results. Weight loss is a huge commitment, and very tough physically and emotionally. It will take time to adjust to your new way of life, but you have plenty of support here whenever you need it.

    And besides, there isn't a better feeling in the world once you start to see results. :)

    Feel free to add me if you would like
  • mrskhv
    mrskhv Posts: 2 Member
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    Wow! That is exactly how I feel at this very moment. I wish I had the answer, but I don't. It's good to know I'm not alone, neither are you.
  • ambie443
    ambie443 Posts: 40
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    did you ever smoke and quit, how about bite your finger nails and quit, I came to the conclusion one day hey I can quit, i have the will power to do so, yes I still wake up every morning thinking I cant do this, but then I log onto mfp and see all the support, that I get up out of bed eat and work out, little things are helping me like looking online at all the clothes that I want to buy once I get down in size, reading peoples story's and seeing there before and after photos help a great deal. come on we got this, we can do this.

    all boils down to will power and positive attitude

    "YES WE CAN"
  • KickinBooty
    KickinBooty Posts: 49
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    Wow, that is so me. I've been struggling to do this for over a year between various programs and I just can't seem to get going. Maybe we can help motivate each other.
  • Shanna_Inc86
    Shanna_Inc86 Posts: 781 Member
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    Omg I wish I could hug you right now. I've been there. I got rid of the tempting food, joined a site like this, started researching, learning, journaling, reading

    Some ppl love her and some don't, I love Jillian Michaels....maybe check out her books, especially Unlimited. I also use to and still will look up quotes to inspire me

    I use to tell myself every morning that I was going to be happy and I surrounded myself with positive people. Instead of thinking "I can't"...think "why can't I"
  • JamiroJunior
    JamiroJunior Posts: 139
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    OH MY GOSH. THIS is how I've been feeling, down to the whole "if it's not perfect it sends me into binge eating mode". I lost ten pounds, got into school, probably gain a third of it back, I feel depressed. Right now though, I realize, this isn't impossible, I can have an even BETTER body than what I wanted in the summer. So let me pledge this here, I WILL MAKE IT. So will you. I'm planning to keep a written diary (I know it's lame, stick with me) to lose the extra 6 or 8 pounds. We all support you. :flowerforyou:
  • Joj43
    Joj43 Posts: 54
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    Firstly you should know, that you are not alone. You are not abnormal for having these thoughts; for giving in when you have one little slip-up; for having really bad days and taking it out on your body. You are not alone. You cry, I cry with you because I have been there and am still going there. But what I know is this: it takes hard work and it's not easy but together we can do it. We slip up...well we're only human. We lose a pound or two...well we're bloody awesome!! We need to celebrate the things that are really important - the things that make us proud of ourselves! Noone said it would be easy but if you truely want this, you can do it (and so can I!).
  • ljbhill
    ljbhill Posts: 276 Member
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    I also tried every diet under the sun. The I turned 30 and decided... why the hell shouldn't I do this for me? I wanted to be skinner AND healthier. The beauty of MFP... it's not a diet! You can eat anything! It just teaches you about portion control and calories. My weapon for success is organisation.

    1. Plan out your day.
    2.Throw out all junk! I know it is hard to waste food but it will show to yourself that you are committed to this weight loss.
    3. Input EVERYTHING into your diary
    4. Buy some scales and WEIGH your portions.
    5. When temptation does strike go for a walk around the block and than ask yourself afterwards if you still want it (if you do, have it but make sure you go for another walk). Be proud when you do this, savour the feeling of having willpower, celebrate the small victories like this every day. It's retraining yourself to 'think' BEFORE you eat. Rather than quickly eating without thinking and then feeling guilty afterwards.

    Last of all. Don't ever give up. One 'slip' up can be fixed with your next 'think' before you eat, or you can offset it with exercise. That's the beauty of MFP. Don't start tomorrow. Start now!

    I did and now look and feel better than I did at 15!!

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