just got pinned under a 45 pound bar at the gym

You know, once upon a time I was the obese woman in a yoga studio full of svelte (or so it seemed to me) practitioners.

I couldn’t do twists, couldn’t do binds, and didn’t have a hope in hell of doing arm balances.

But I tried, oh boy did I try. Got a giant bruise on my forehead when I was doing a forward fold, standing on my palms. Yeah it’s a yoga thing. Pitched forward and couldn’t do a damn thing about it because I was standing on my hands, so nothing to catch myself with. Landed on my noggin.

Many times I came home in tears, frustrated. But I enjoyed it, loved it, and was determined to be one of “those” people.

Me. Obese. Never an athlete. Always chosen last. Flunked the Presidents Physical Fitness test every.single. year. Got winded going up stairs. Hated walking anywhere. Always tired.

I focused first on losing weight. Binds came easier because I didn’t have to physically shift fat rolls.

Decided what I needed to improve yoga practice was to develop upper body strength. Joined a (of all things) competitive “metal” gym. People who moved shite tons of weight. That’ll never be me, but found I enjoyed that, too.

Built some muscle.

Now, I’m the one the youngsters come to afterwards and say “wow! You’ve got a beautiful practice! You’re so strong! I want to be like you!” The silent implication is “….and you’re old as my mom/grandma”. People are going to think thoughts and you can’t help it.

You can gnaw on it and let it get you down, or you can come back and show those punks, or the other doubters in your life that you’ve got what it takes to stick it out and do it.

trust me, teenagers are mean SOBS, and even if you hadn’t done that, they’d have found something else to laugh or make fun of. I bet you and I did the same thing at that age. Who cares what they think? They’ll be us someday, and that’s a very satisfying thought (though I wouldn’t actually wish obesity or poor fitness on anyone!)

Are you going to let a bunch of punk *kitten* teens ruin your day?

Turn it on its ear. Ask them to help you learn how to use the equipment properly. Ask if they’d mind spotting you, critiquing you. I bet they’d- or at least one or two of them- be so surprised to be asked, and probably pleased, too. You may end up with an unexpected support group.

I can’t beleive how awesome the big lifters were at that first gym Unbelievably helpful and friendly I was so scared they were going to snub or laugh at me All they wanted was to help me improve.

Anyone else here remember Charles Atlas, and “they kicked sand in my face”?

and PS, your gym will have a 35 pound bar somewhere in the building. There’s no shame in using it, or using dumbbells on a bench, either, til you build some strength.

I bet you’ll find some niche you can do well. I could never bench press any significant amount, but when I did bamboos with dangling weights, my yoga practice had made my focus so good, those other, heavy lifters would stop to watch and applaud because my control was so good.

We’ve all got some crazy skill others wish they had.

I can’t stand on one leg to save my life, even after years and years of practice. It’s wildly frustrating. But give me a new yoga arm balance to try, and I’m working out the logistics til I’ve got it.