Eating with friends

cassybubby · October 2011

I've recently been out with friends for dinner, and they've ordered some entree's to share, which I declined. When I declined I was met with a "You're allowed to indulge you know" which really frustrated me! I do indulge, but I indulge in things that I feel are worth it - like cake or chocolate - not oily bread and dip for an entree. It makes me feel like they're trying to sabotage my attempts, or perhaps make themselves feel better about eating the entree... I'm not sure. but it really annoys me when people won't listen when I say I don't want to eat something because it doesn't fit in with my healthy food choices. Has any one else come across this? And if so, what did you do?

sc1572 · October 2011

YES! It's so, so frustrating...I feel the same with chips and salsa at a Mexican restaurant. I'd rather save those cals for something else! And I just ignore them and stick to my guns!

rockylucas · October 2011

I actually discussed this very issue with my eating disorder therapist... very firmly tell them your stance on the issue, that you do indulge when you want to, that you would be indulging at that moment if you felt like it, and that you would appreciate it if they were more supportive of your efforts to be healthy, (as you are supportive of their efforts to not be, ie, you are not criticizing them for eating junk).

If after you communicate this clearly to them, they continue with their childish behavior, then treat them as you would any other disrespectful person, whether that be ignoring them, going off on them, finding more supportive friends, etc.

nygiantschick · October 2011

I used to but now my friends know that I am completely committed to this new lifestyle and so now I don't have that issue. Hang in there.

bbandjreed · October 2011

this may sound shady, but fake an allergy or food sensitivity. Like "since I have been off bread for so long it really upsets my stomach but I really wish I could!" that way people don't get offended, like you're judging them. I use that one a lot

rachemn · October 2011

My friends used to be the same way...the worst! but now I think they are too embarassed to order high calorie and high fat foods when they are with me. They look at my weight loss and they know that I wouldn't be caught dead eating those foods so now instead of ordering cheeseburgers and onion rings, they get soup and salad or another healthy option....at least when I'm along. I just keep preaching my healthy lifestyle to them.

You keep doing what you're doing and just laugh it off...maybe preach at them a little bit! There is nothing wrong and everything right with eating healthy and exercising!

Gigi_licious · October 2011

I face this at work all the time because my co worker and I are spoiled and people are forever offering us food, cake, whatever. Sometimes, if I want it, I eat it. But if I don't want it and my co worker asks why I say "because I'm trying to quit being a fat people." Then she says "ok". And that's that.

Jean410 · October 2011

Many of my friends and family do this to me AND they feel the need to throw their two cents in on what I should do or how I should do it. So I either use that day as my "free" day where I indulge a little or I tell them I've worked too hard this week to sabotage it all. I think they all want to be supportive, so I usually let them know ahead of time I want to eat at a place that offers healthy options. I think it's best to be upfront and honest. Those who are not supportive, don't get my company.

Ruby11222 · October 2011

Gosh, I hate that. Usually these are the same people who used to watch you 'indulge' in these entree's with that look on their faces like, sheesh, stop eating all the time!

People seem to always need to put in their 2 cents no matter what you do or how you look.

Eating with friends

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