The New Fad... This won't last

Krull_the_WarriorKing
Krull_the_WarriorKing Posts: 650 Member
edited October 2024 in Chit-Chat
I head about these 11 steps to dieting. Sounds like it was written by a dumb douchepickle if you ask me...

Eat a variety of nutrient-rich foods
Enjoy plenty of whole grains, fruits and vegetables
Maintain a healthy weight.
Eat moderate portions.
Fart so hard your boobs shake
Eat regular meals.
Reduce, don't eliminate certain foods.
Balance your food choices over time.
Know your diet pitfalls.
Make changes gradually
Remember, foods are not good or bad.
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Replies

  • voluptuous_veggie
    voluptuous_veggie Posts: 476 Member
    I completely agree with #5
  • MrsBrosco
    MrsBrosco Posts: 295 Member
    "douchepickle" :drinker:
  • firefightinflip
    firefightinflip Posts: 215 Member
    What about the nut butter??
  • skittybang
    skittybang Posts: 1,525 Member
    This will never work
  • ilovedeadlifts
    ilovedeadlifts Posts: 2,923 Member

    Reduce, don't eliminate certain foods.

    thats the only one I really agree with.
    enjoy the foods you like, in moderation.


    most of them totally sucked
  • a1rose
    a1rose Posts: 127 Member
    What about the nut butter??

    Tahahhaha! :)

    NUT BUTTER
  • andyloosbrock
    andyloosbrock Posts: 175 Member
    I had a douche pickle last night along with my burger and fries. Crazy!
  • My3Rayz
    My3Rayz Posts: 373 Member
    "Reduce, don't eliminate certain foods."

    So you can only poop out certain foods? Like selective pooping? This will never work for me!
  • Gigi_licious
    Gigi_licious Posts: 1,185 Member
    Ummmm.....you forgot HCG, shakes, and soup. No plan is complete without them.
  • anubis609
    anubis609 Posts: 3,966 Member
    Douche pickles and homemade nut butters [extracted from various nuts] are pregnancy food. Usually because the craving came prior to fertilization.
  • pnieuw
    pnieuw Posts: 473 Member
    I'm a guy..I have moobs. Is that close enough for #5?
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,137 Member
    You got this off Yahoo, didn't you?
  • Pollywog39
    Pollywog39 Posts: 1,730 Member
    WHAT?

    This idea is way to radical...................

    and #5? does that refer to BOTH genders?

    I see a very sexist issue here, and I'm highly offended!
  • anubis609
    anubis609 Posts: 3,966 Member
    You got this off Yahoo, didn't you?

    I saw it on Alta Vista.
  • Krull_the_WarriorKing
    Krull_the_WarriorKing Posts: 650 Member
    WHAT?

    This idea is way to radical...................

    and #5? does that refer to BOTH genders?

    I see a very sexist issue here, and I'm highly offended!
    It is sexist - deal with it. Men don't fart.
  • Sublimely_Self_Righteousreused
    Sublimely_Self_Righteousreused Posts: 933 Member
    Douche pickles and homemade nut butters [extracted from various nuts] are pregnancy food. Usually because the craving came prior to fertilization.

    My homemade nut butters are amazing too. They coat the mouth nicely. Even have been used to paint eggs white before.
  • Krizzle4Rizzle
    Krizzle4Rizzle Posts: 2,704 Member
    Remember, foods are not good or bad.

    LIES!! Food is EVIL!!
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
    Fiber One cereal for breakfast. Not just the boobs... the pictures on the walls are shaking!
  • liftingbro
    liftingbro Posts: 2,029 Member
    I like #5 but the more weight I lose the harder that one is getting to stick with.
  • anubis609
    anubis609 Posts: 3,966 Member
    Douche pickles and homemade nut butters [extracted from various nuts] are pregnancy food. Usually because the craving came prior to fertilization.

    My homemade nut butters are amazing too. They coat the mouth nicely. Even have been used to paint eggs white before.

    Yes. And it creates a healthy froth when it's mixed in a shaker bottle of egg whites. Pure, thick protein right there.
  • a1rose
    a1rose Posts: 127 Member
    WHAT?

    This idea is way to radical...................

    and #5? does that refer to BOTH genders?

    I see a very sexist issue here, and I'm highly offended!
    It is sexist - deal with it. Men don't fart.

    LOL!! Totally really actually laughed hard about that! :)
  • onefitdiva
    onefitdiva Posts: 331 Member
    I wonder how many people will read the OP's entire post and MISS #5. Bahahahaaaa! *sits and waits for a serious moron*
  • Lizzy_Sunflower
    Lizzy_Sunflower Posts: 1,510 Member
    sounds suspiciously like the Latest diet:

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/233474-the-latest-diet?hl=latest+diet
  • sexforjaffacakes
    sexforjaffacakes Posts: 1,001 Member
    Ths iZ nev gona wrk am on 5 CAloris a week n av lost 10POUNNS in 2 wks

    I onLy eta 1 grape evry dy and am doin fyn so I dnt think tis diet will wrkk
    THS DITE HAZ 2 MNY CAL0RIES

    ND NO1 SAY NYTING NEGATVE PLZZZZ I JST WNT SUPPORT IN MA DIEET
  • maab_connor
    maab_connor Posts: 3,927 Member
    "Reduce, don't eliminate certain foods."

    So you can only poop out certain foods? Like selective pooping? This will never work for me!

    so glad i'm not the only one who read it that way. LOL
  • morganhccstudent724
    morganhccstudent724 Posts: 1,261 Member
    No Tacos?!?!? :sad:
  • liftingbro
    liftingbro Posts: 2,029 Member
    Ths iZ nev gona wrk am on 5 CAloris a week n av lost 10POUNNS in 2 wks

    I onLy eta 1 grape evry dy and am doin fyn so I dnt think tis diet will wrkk
    THS DITE HAZ 2 MNY CAL0RIES

    ND NO1 SAY NYTING NEGATVE PLZZZZ I JST WNT SUPPORT IN MA DIEET

    Sadly, I've seen posts just like that on here.
  • BondBomb
    BondBomb Posts: 1,781 Member
    Is a Douchepickle even possible?
    Douch has vinegar thereby producing a douchecucumber.

    I think I have proven your diet wrong!
  • sexforjaffacakes
    sexforjaffacakes Posts: 1,001 Member
    Ths iZ nev gona wrk am on 5 CAloris a week n av lost 10POUNNS in 2 wks

    I onLy eta 1 grape evry dy and am doin fyn so I dnt think tis diet will wrkk
    THS DITE HAZ 2 MNY CAL0RIES

    ND NO1 SAY NYTING NEGATVE PLZZZZ I JST WNT SUPPORT IN MA DIEET

    Sadly, I've seen posts just like that on here.

    I know. I cry every time I see one. I dunno what's more upsetting, the fact that they're on HGC or the fact they can't write properly...
  • maab_connor
    maab_connor Posts: 3,927 Member
    Ths iZ nev gona wrk am on 5 CAloris a week n av lost 10POUNNS in 2 wks

    I onLy eta 1 grape evry dy and am doin fyn so I dnt think tis diet will wrkk
    THS DITE HAZ 2 MNY CAL0RIES

    ND NO1 SAY NYTING NEGATVE PLZZZZ I JST WNT SUPPORT IN MA DIEET

    bwahahaha. win.
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