Eating disorder

hey everyone. i've actually been a mfp member for a long time, about 6 months--but recently got this account as i kind of wanted to post in anonymity. I need serious advice. I know no one here is a "qualified professional" or anything, but I could really use opinions.

I guess, I need to know if I need to seek help for an eating disorder. Not sure which "type", or if it is me just blowing things out of proportion in my head, but a recent change in my schedule has prompted me to really think about it.

As I said, I began doing this about 6 months ago, and since then, have kept to the 1,200 calorie net almost consistently. Granted, not always from healthy things (although try to make it the bulk of my diet). I still eat candy/sweets, as that is the one thing I can't give up. There have really not been any days I totally let myself go. More days I was more lenient than others, but none where I just said "whatever, I don't care".

I'm terrified of gaining weight. I've lost about 12 lbs in this process, after having lost about 10-15 at an earlier point, resulting in about a 30 lb weight loss over the period of the year. I've never been this thin, but I still have a decent amount of chub on my stomach. (5'5" and weighed in at 120 at the doctors the other day). I've gotten compliments, I've never felt healthier, as I eat healthier, work out and am in the best shape of my life. Recently, I was sick, as well as traveling with a group of people to a conference for work, which resulted in lots of free food (free lunches, free candy, etc) and I just went off. I ate so much candy, convincing myself I didn't care, but then wouldn't stop talking about it. I realized I talked about how much candy I ate to everyone. My sister, who happened to also be here, said to me "would you stop talking about that for like 5 minutes? All you do is talk about calories and getting fat" and threw in the word anorexic somewhere. That's when it hit me. I haven't seen my sister in months. But she was right. I was talking and thinking about calories ALL day. Every night when we went out to dinner, I ordered a salad, as I couldn't bear all the damage I had done during the day. When people ordered other things (french fries, fried sandwiches, I judged them instantaneously, and was grossed out). I couldn't work out during this time either. I was going crazy. I realized yesterday, that even through it all, I may have gained one pound, because I didn't let myself get too crazy. And that shouldn't be a big deal.

But, now that it's over and I'm heading home, I've already planned out what I'm going to eat and got in the hotel gym for an hour this morning. I couldn't bear to deviate from my schedule. The idea of not being able to eat what I want/what I'm used to or ahve control over my diet/exercise terrifies me. All I think about is food, how much I'm allowed to eat and when I get to eat. It's not something I just do without thinking.

I definitely still eat. All my allotted calories, everyday. Because, I love food. And I keep thinking about it. I just ate 30 mins ago, but I try to distract myself so I don't tihnk about food. But, I can't even be productive and do my work because this is all I think about.
I'm sorry for the long post, but I really need advice. Some people have told me that watching what you eat and being healthy is all a part of being older. I need to get to the point where I know that I can go off for a day and still not deviate from my weight because I know what I need to do to stay at this point. But I can't get there. I'm so scared. I never thought this would happen to me. I just always thought it was silly--why wouldn't you want to eat? Well I still do, but it's taken over my life. Should I see someone about this?

Thank you.