Lonely fat mummy

mamalula
mamalula Posts: 42
edited October 3 in Introduce Yourself
Hi I am new and scared! I live in France but am English, have no friends here and two little ones, 3yrs and 5months. Have put on lots of weight with my pregnancies and now really hating myself! So afraid to fail again but have no support network here just surrounded by thin,beautiful, unfriendly French women! I am at home all day with the baby who I am breast feeding so feel very lonely. Really hope I can motivate myself to get out of this house, I used to swim to lose weight before but I can't bring myself to put on a swimming costume. Anyway pretty pethetic really, hope this will help.

Replies

  • Hey, don't be scared!! This site is fab and people are soooo supportive! I have been off track for about a month(ish) but started again today with gusto!1 And all my fitness pals are still there to help me.Get the kids in a pushchair and go out for a walk, doesnt matter where! Feel free to add me. xx
  • monkeysmum
    monkeysmum Posts: 522 Member
    i agree with scattymum we are all friendly on here and i wouldnt have stuck at it like i have without mfp and the people on it feel free to add me and dont worry what anyone there thinks just know you are doing great for you
  • It is very hard to be away from family or some type of support group especially after you just have a baby. All those hormones are out of control! And, having a baby is a lot of work, not to mention two of them! I'm so happy to hear that you are breastfeeding! It is so good for not only the baby but you also! It burns a ton of calories! Just remember, you were pregnant for over 9 months, give yourself at least that amount of time to lose the weight you gained. Take it slow. Just enjoy your babies! They are a wonderful blessing and motivation to be healthy!
  • Aries03
    Aries03 Posts: 179 Member
    Hi We are all going to be your friend, please dont be afraid thats awful :flowerforyou:
  • julie204
    julie204 Posts: 130
    hey glad you came on here you can add me as a friend we can support each other :smile:
  • Ellem86
    Ellem86 Posts: 204
    Congrats on your two babies!

    You don't sound pathetic at all and we're a lovely bunch on MFP! Stick around, get involved with posting, add some friends and soon you will prefer this site to Facebook, with the bonus being that any extra weight will drop off.
  • swadley27
    swadley27 Posts: 6 Member
    STAY ENCOURAGED AND REMEMBER TO TRY TO LOG-IN EVERYDAY.
  • fiabka
    fiabka Posts: 294 Member
    Hey dont beat yourself up, moving to a 'strange' country is hard enough but with two very small children is extreme huni & you should give yourself a big pat on the back for doing so well at coping so far.

    This is a brilliant place for help, encouragement & motivation so jump on board and start your journey knowing that there are a lot of people all ready and willing to help you every step of the way - if thats what you want !!

    Have a fabulous day & show those French women what us Brit girls are made of!!!!!!!!!

    Feel free to add & enjoy the 1st day of the rest of your life !

    :flowerforyou:
  • manjingirl
    manjingirl Posts: 188 Member
    Merde! Where abouts in France? Don't give up on yourself, yes, you're doing it pretty tough right now. But hang in there, you'll find some friends. Have you read the book Almost French? The author also observed that French women were not so friendly, in fact they all behaved as though they were competing (apparently French men are all philandering schmucks). So you're in good company. Sure that doesn't help your lonely feelings but at least you're not crazy or paranoid. Meantime you've got us lot to deal with. We'll certainly give you a hard time if you don't cheer up! lol.

    Seriously, there's lots of friendly people here who'll support you in your quest for greater health and fitness. And we'd love to see some pics of your babies, bet they're cute as could be.
  • rorosaw
    rorosaw Posts: 360 Member
    Aw, Love, don't be scared. You're in the right place. Lots of people here to support you. I'm sending you a friend request. No pressure to accept but if you need support, I'm here for you.
  • Hiya, my mum lives in France and although she doesnt have small children, i get completly the isolation aspect as she often talks of this with me, especislly not speaking the lingo ect.
    This is a fab site for support and motivation, feel free to add me. You can do this with help of good friends and theres a great bunch on here. Good luck xxxx
  • FunRun08
    FunRun08 Posts: 203 Member
    The great thing about this site is that no matter how alone you feel someone else has been there! You have taken the first step, there are some amazing supprotive people on this site and you can build your own support system that you are lacking at home. Keep your head up and try to remember how long it has taken you to get to where you are at, with 2 kids to boot. Cut yourself some slack and get started. :)
  • kaizo
    kaizo Posts: 87 Member
    Hey hun! Welcome to mfp, we're all here for you, for support and motivation. You can do this! You've taken the first step by joining this site! I've sent you a friend request xxx
  • AnnmarieSimmons
    AnnmarieSimmons Posts: 51 Member
    Hi mamalula,

    Awwww sorry you feel like that (((Hugs))))

    MFP is really a great way to lose weight, get motivated and meet friends. If you log in everyday im sure you will reach your goals in no time!!

    Good Luck xx
  • eaglemonster
    eaglemonster Posts: 156 Member
    Hi, you've come to the right place MFP is a great support and motivational place. Find the inner strength to get out and do what you need to after all it is for you that you want to do this. There will always be support from within this site.
  • Wow totally overwhelmed by the responses. Thank you so much everyone.
  • shellybelly35
    shellybelly35 Posts: 4 Member
    I think that this will help,i know that your calories need to be up a lil for that baby but if your at home all day just everytime you eat, try to record, hopefully actually seeing what your eating can help you curb bad habits.because you will want to find healthier lower cal foods so you can eat more! I have been doin this for a lil over a week and am doing well so far, Im sure that you will do well also. just dont give in. incorporate that baby into excersize if you can! Even if it is jumping around,dancing, It will prob be entertaining to the baby..lol(at least 18 yrs ago that worked for me)!
  • joseph9
    joseph9 Posts: 328 Member
    I was kind of hoping this would be a Halloween thread, but welcome! We're glad to see you and stick around!
  • ozycat
    ozycat Posts: 72 Member
    Hi there!

    I used to live in the Limousin so I can really understand the isolation you feel! My bestest mate in the world still lives there and has two young children.

    Since finding MFP I have managed to lose nearly 2 stone and it's been a good journey. People are really supportive and I quite enjoy logging the calories and exercise - it puts everything into perspective!

    Friend me if you like!

    Don't give up on yourself - you're not pathectic, just struggling a bit at the moment. It WILL pass.

    Tale care :-)
  • benodie
    benodie Posts: 231 Member
    aww sorry you feel like that! I know what you mean about the swimming thing . .thats my favorite kind of excersise but that horrible walk from the changing room to the pool in a swimming costume puts me right off the idea!!

    you do not sound pathetic you just sound like you need help and support . .you will DEFINETLY get that here if you log-in every day . .I have 'met' some really lovely helpful people, I've been logging in for 85 days now and I still feel just as motivated to do this as I did on day 1!!

    Good luck and friend me if u like :smile:
  • Shanna_Inc86
    Shanna_Inc86 Posts: 781 Member
    Echoing what has already been said, you do not said pathetic. Hell, I didn't even have my daughter yet and moved out of state and felt alone...I'd cry all the time " I wanna go HOME...I want my MOM"

    I haven't been on this site long and I was on another one and there are now people that I've made friends with and plan on visiting as soon as the funds are in order. Its a great place for support and knowledge.

    Take care and congratulations on the babies. :smile:
  • reba1961
    reba1961 Posts: 2 Member
    I just started on here maybe 2 weeks ago. But, this week is my first real week at taking it seriously and having fun with it. I have been reading the forums, and blogs from others and it is so inspiring to me. With a little help from friends on here you will succeed, take small steps until you are comfortable with the surroundings. Learn also to be comfortable in your own skin. You would be so surprised at how much that changes your attitude about yourself and it does build up confidence. Good luck and I am here anytime you need to talk. :drinker:
  • omgzstef
    omgzstef Posts: 157
    DON'T BE SCARED! Look at this experience with a new light and a new you. Take it by storm, mama! If you need support, don't hesitate to add me as a friend :) Good luck!
  • CARNAT22
    CARNAT22 Posts: 764 Member
    Hi I am new and scared! I live in France but am English, have no friends here and two little ones, 3yrs and 5months. Have put on lots of weight with my pregnancies and now really hating myself! So afraid to fail again but have no support network here just surrounded by thin,beautiful, unfriendly French women! I am at home all day with the baby who I am breast feeding so feel very lonely. Really hope I can motivate myself to get out of this house, I used to swim to lose weight before but I can't bring myself to put on a swimming costume. Anyway pretty pethetic really, hope this will help.

    Who needs real friends when you can have virtual ones hey? LOL!!

    Do you speak French hun?

    I suggest with weightloss you take the 'little by little' approach - Rome wasn't built in a day as they say.

    Sorry that you feel so lonely but hopefully getting fit and healthy can be your new 'thing'.

    if you do not feel good in your swim suit why not make that one of your goals??

    xxxxxxxx
  • Elmaunie
    Elmaunie Posts: 78 Member
    Sent you a friend request :smile: I'm not always great at keeping up to date but I'm good for a natter :wink:

    I was a single mum for the majority of my boys' childhoods so I know it can be tough but you'll do it!! And breastfeeding helps lose loads of weight :flowerforyou:
  • sharont81
    sharont81 Posts: 24 Member
    I too am new to this and found the people on here to be inviting and willing to help out when you ask. Welcome!
  • mstrecie
    mstrecie Posts: 1 Member
    I'm new on here too, but welcome aboard..:happy:
  • Bnutz
    Bnutz Posts: 8
    Hi there, I wanted to say not to feel negative about yourself. We are all beautiful in one way or another, It's not about looks all the time. But I deff know what you are feeling. Main key is to never give up and always strive for what you want. Good luck and I'm here for anything you may need.
  • MomMel65
    MomMel65 Posts: 47 Member
    Hi Mama - Oh, have I ever been in your shoes! I was pregnant when I married, and delivered 3 months after my wedding. Was instantly a stay-at-home mom (previously worked 40/hr/week), depressed, and felt all alone! My hubby was a raging alcoholic to top it all off (different story, won't detail it here - LOL!). I put on mega poundage these past 10 years, but now that I have a 12 year old son and 10 year old daughter, I've finally figured out that it's time to put ME FIRST. But interestingly enough, by putting ME first, everyone else in the house is following suit! I live with my hubby, my 2 kids, and recently a sister moved in my house, and together, in one week we have cumulatively lost 22 pounds using this website. It is just amazing.... you just need to be firm, count every calorie, watch your food labels, input your recipes and portion them accordingly, exercise, and you'll be good to go! Take it from me, whose only exercise used to be walking from the living room couch to the kitchen, that it can be done! Throw your whole mind into yourSELF. Because if it benefits you, it will benefit your children. I'm down 18 lb. since last month, but first found this website just last week, and lost 3 lb. this last week. Feel free to put me as your friend, I'd love to email you personally and we can keep each other inspired! It's so very hard to be a mom, feel alone, and then feel good enough about yourself to do things FOR yourself... I've been there. You're definitely on the right track, don't let anyone derail you!! Keep on keeping on!!
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