No time, no motivation I think I need to start again.

Jacquibennett · October 2011

Hi

I don't know if anyone else has found the same problems as me when trying to start their new healthy lifestyle, but I see all these people on here doing exercise every day and I just don't seem to have the time. Recently every time I have tried to schedule in doing exercise, either going out for a walk/run, or just doing something on my equipment indoors, something will crop up. Either my bf will ring saying he is out of work early, or someone is asking if I can pick something up while they are busy elsewhere. If I'm not at work I'm running errands, and if I'm not doing that I'm too tired to move! I'm amazed I still find the time to over eat but I think that is more through lack of time to make something nutritionally balanced.
I know that I should put myself first a bit more but I always end up feeling guilty, like I've let someone down when I hadn't even said I would do what they are asking in the first place.
It's really getting me down now as I have been trying to diet for over a year and feel like I have got nowhere. I have dieted before and managed to get to my target weight, and I know how great it feels but it's almost as if the fact that I know I can do it has almost made me complacent, and I keep thinking that 'Tomorrow I'll really stick at it' but we all know tomorrow never comes.

I think a clean slate would help (can you reset on here?)

Just wanted to know if anyone out there had the same problems I'm encountering when trying to work 'Me Time' into your schedule?

Thanks

dls06 · October 2011

It takes a while to get use to anything new. Take it slow and make small changes. It took a lifetime to develop our bad habits. It will take time to break them.:drinker:

alerica1 · October 2011

It has taken a while to learn this but "no" is a complete sentence. I have learned to set up boundaries or others taken advantage of my "me" time.

velix · October 2011

I hear you - funny thing is - motivation and time go hand in hand - when motivated, it seems I can always find time to work out and the will to eat healthy - without motivation, I know deep down I am looking for any excuse. For me, I try to talk to myself - yes, out loud - when I am weaseling my way out of working out due to the lack of "time" or external distractions ... I tell myself why I want to do this - and while it is not always easy to drag my butt out - I know in the long run, those 30+ minutes working out was much better spent than those 30+ minutes on the couch watching television... You deserve to put yourself first! GOOD LUCK and GO GO GO !!!

deja_blu · October 2011

You need to learn how to put you first sometimes. It's very sweet of you to help out those around you but if they care about you like you care about them, they will respect the fact that you want and need time for you.

Accountability is very important in attaining and maintaining a healthy lifestyle. So starting today.....be accountable.

DixiedoesMFP · October 2011

I have the same problem, but try this: Schedule your workout. Schedule it on a calendar just like you would a dentist appointment, or a hair cut, etc. And every day is a new day, so you can "reset". Just try to make small changes that you can stick with that bring you closer to your goal, rather than ten big changes that are overwhelming all at once.

stefchica · October 2011

i TRY to exercise everyday but sometimes i'm just lazy or i have to cook or clean or i need to go shopping or do errands...BUT what i try and do everyday is a schedule. AS SOON as i come home from work I force myself ot work out right away. that way its out of the way, then set aside the rest of the time for other things but sometimes it doesnt always work but i try to at least get in at least 3 days of exercise a week. just plan your day out as best as you can. work out first, then run errands but you have to put yourself first. just tell the others they can hold off for an hour, if you keep giving other people your time instead of giving it to yourself you'll never accomplish anything YOU want to do!

ImaSongbird · October 2011

One of the ways I get my exercise in is to actually schedule it as an appointment. Since I go to school at night, I have to change the schedule each semester, but I choose which days I'll do cardio and which days I'll do lifting, and put them on my calendar. That way, if someone wants to make plans with me, I can say "I'm free after XX o'clock".

I keep my appointment at the gym just as I would any other appointment, and somehow, all the other things seem to get done as well. When I exercise first thing in the morning (which I can only do on weekends and holidays), it makes me much better able to handle whatever other responsibilities I have, and it makes me *want* to eat right.

If BF gets off work early and wants to hang out, maybe you could say: "I'm getting ready to work out. Do you want to join me, or should we meet afterward?"

Best of luck to you!

DKing33 · October 2011

Sometimes I have to tell myself just give it 5 minutes, before I know it I have done 40-45. Just saying No is not a bad thing and don't feel quilty about it. Being a healthy you is good for your friends and family too.

mellissacase · October 2011

Hi Jacqui

I have just read your post and can totally relate to you! I'm on my official try number 2 and about 2 weeks in, so far its going well because i'm trying not to put pressure on myself and have no targets. The hardest thing for me is that I work shifts and late nights so the last thing I want to be doing when I come home late or on my day off is heavy exercise.

What is working for me and what i'm aiming to do is change my lifestyle by doing something just a little different everyday. I really think slow is the key. I also have put old photos of myself and how I want to look by all the mirrors and fridge in the house so when I don't feel up to it I see the pics and feel guilty, its working so far!!

Anyway I'm sure you'll find your own way of doing things, good luck you can do it! Feel free to add me as a friend for support

Mel xx

usmcmp · October 2011

I schedule a specific time every day (except Sunday) to go to the gym. If anyone NEEDS me then they know where I am, but they all know that I am unavailable for that specific time every day.

tmiqueen · October 2011

If errands are what's hindering your workouts, here's what you can do:

1) Tell them "Sorry, but I was just heading to the gym. I won't be able to get that for you today."

2) Tell them "Sorry, but I was just heading to the gym. I won't be done until 6 p.m. I could maybe pick it up after I'm done, if that's not too late? Otherwise, I think someone else is going to have to do it."

3) To boyfriend, "Hey, I just started my walk. Can I talk to you when I get done, or do you want to join me? I'll get started and you can find me."

Don't let other people be your excuse. Don't feel obligated to run other people's errands. It's not your fault that they don't have their day better scheduled and just expect good ole you to always do it, just because you always have in the past. It's time to be a tiny bit selfish....for your health!

Soooze · October 2011

Hi. We all have busy lifes, work, kids, family, friends, cook, clean, etc... and the list, as you know, goes on and on.
Excuses not to workout are plentiful. You have to make exercising about YOU! You need it to make you stronger and healthier.

For me, I like doing kickboxing or high intensity cardio classes. I can't just walk on a treadmill or elliptical, I need to be 'entertained and challenged'. My workouts are my daily therapy. I think of nothing else but getting through my workout!
I suggest you find a way to exercise that you really, really enjoy. It will be a form of therapy and you will not want to miss it.

I go to the gym at lunch. Most co-workers go out for lunch, go shopping or bum around on the computer at lunch. I workout.

Twins2007 · October 2011

Fist of all...You are NOT a failure.

It seems to me like you are putting way too much pressure on yourself but forgeting what you really want and deserve.
Do you want to exercise?
Do you want to diet?
Do you want to lose weight? For YOU...Not for anyone else?

When I get overwhelmed like this I sit down and ask myself "What are my goals? Why are these my goals?"

I have been on the rollercoaster of dieting since I was 9...9!

Diets, starvations, beating yourself up, hating yourself, working out to exercises you don't like...It doesn't work.

I should know...I have lost weight very easily in the past...30-40 pounds in less than 6 months, only to regain it all PLUS later.

Since January I have been on a new Journey of not just losing 60 pounds but doing it in a way that I deal with my emotional eating and it's been really hard..HARD because I have to deal, accept and constantly reacess why I am doing this.

I deserve this..And so do you.

Last week I took a week off from working out because I was getting too obsessed with the scale...Sometimes you just need to take a step back...To get back on track

Good luck!

E xo

Pocket_Pixi · October 2011

I had this exact same problem and you know what I did? I made a schedule, I told EVERY single person I know that between this time and this time I will be working out. when that time came around I would put my phone on vibrate and left it where I couldn't see it so if anyone called me I wouldn't pick up. If they came over and knocked I ignored them, if they walked in I continued to do my work out because they had been warned that that was what I was doing.

People will eventually get the hint. If someone calls and asks you to pick something up you can always say, "Yeah no problem but it will be after my work out will that be ok? " If they say no, than tell them they have to find someone else to do it because you are busy.

DG82 · October 2011

I can completely relate... even more now over the past year especially! I've received a promotion at work and ever since it seems like I come home more and more exhausted than I had previously :-( I almost have no energy to even figure out / cook dinner and it's just me I'm cookin for, ugh! I am NOT a morning person and it literally can take me at least 20 mins most days just to get me out of bed and starting to get ready for work. Who knew when we were kids that life would be so exhausting and hard. :-( I feel like I can't even enjoy my life b/c everyday is the same thing on repeat... I have no idea how people are able to maintain a healthy lifestyle when they have a family especially :-( I only have a kitty and me to take care of and I can't even manage to keep myself in good health :-( I'll take suggestions too, ugh :-/

kcwonder · October 2011

I used to workout 5-6 days a week. I am on my third rest day. For some reason, I cannot get motivated to get back in the gym. I end up laying on the couch for a nap after work. Fortunately, I am still watching my food intake.

jbkeck · October 2011

I can relate to what you are saying since I too have used the "not enough time" excuse to avoid exercise. I HATE exercising, but have found people who are supportive rather than inhibitive to my goal so the "time" has miraculously appeared. We all have the same 24 hours and taking 1 hour for yourself everyday is not being selfish.

One solution is to not be a slave to the phone. Turn it off or if it rings, don't answer it. You need to control the phone - don't let it control you. The world won't come to an end if you wait 60 minutes to respond to a text message. Your friends should be supporting your choice to exercise, not impeding it. If your friends question why you didn't answer right away, tell them the truth - you were exercising. Invite them to join you. If you set aside the same time everyday to exercise and your friends call you during that time period, and you don't respond, soon they will get the message that 5-6 PM, for example, is your exercise time and you aren't going to answer texts or phone calls. Their "crises" will still exist when you are done exercising.

Remember, only you can decide if a healthier life style is important and if it really is, make exercise and healthy eating a priority. That means something else will have to decrease in importance temporarily. If the people in your life are true friends, they will understand and encourage you. Good luck.

jbdowns35 · October 2011

I know EXACTLY where you are coming from. I could have written your post myself. I'm getting better at putting me first & making time. You have to decide that fitting exercise into your schedule comes FIRST. Everything else will get done. I find that if I go straight home from work & do a Jillian Micheals video or go for a walk, I have more energy & get more accomplished the rest of the evening as apposed to if I would not have worked out at all.

I plan out my exercises in advance, write it down on my DAILY 'to do' list, right at the top. Followed by laundry, take out garbage, etc. If something comes up, I do it after I work out, or adjust if I have to, but only if it can be justified. Maybe add in something extra the day after, or do something else that doesn't take as much time, etc.

Also planning & prepping meals for a few days or a week has been a huge help to me!!! It takes a big chunk out of my time on Sunday afternoon to plan, shop, prep, etc., but it seriously pays off during the week!! It has really taken some time, trial & error to get good at it, but I think I finally got a grip on the food thing. I'm saving money, too.

And....STOP feeling guilty!!! I know exactly how that feels!!! Trust me, those people you are doing for are not going to be upset with you if you don't bend over backwards for them!!! This is another thing I've struggled with & there is a learning process, adjustment. You just gotta say no. I'm getting much better at this, & guess what, those bad guilty feelings do start to fade. I'm starting to feel so good about putting myself first & in reality, I still am able to do most of the things for my family I did before, I just found a different way to approach things. Me first.

WhiteRaven · October 2011

For me to be successful I had to get out of the mindset of "Finding time" to work out.. Instead I "Make time" to work out - Don't let others rule your day or your time.. Make the time to do what you need. Those little errands people want you to do. So no, make the time for yourself. They keep asking you because they know you will go out of your way to do it. Don't... Keep that time for YOU.

My two cents.
WR

RichLove1 · October 2011

Wow what an amazing forum! I've been on MFP a few weeks but not used the forums other than to say hi. I saw your post Jacqui and came to give some advice but it's all been said above. What a great support network.

No time, no motivation I think I need to start again.

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