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transylvaniaxx
transylvaniaxx Posts: 31
in Motivation and Support
The last few days, I've realized that no one but my doctor knows how much I weigh. Two days ago, I finally told my MFP pals, and even that was difficult for me. Now... I'm trying to gather up the courage to tell my boyfriend of two years how much I actually weigh. He knows I'm on MFP, that I've been dieting, and I've told him how much weight I've lost, but he doesn't know how much I weigh. He tells me he doesn't care and he loves me no matter what.... But it's still scary to say anything. He's only 149 pounds and in amazing shape, he works out, has muscle, a six pack, etc...

So I have a question for you lovely people. How many of you have told your boyfriends/girlfriends your weight? Was it hard for you to do? Do some of you still have significant others who don't know? How to I build up the courage to say anything? I'm just so embarrassed.

Help!
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Replies

  • ambermichon
    ambermichon Posts: 404 Member
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    My husband knows my weight but it was really hard for me to let my trainer see how much I weigh. LOL I weigh more than he thought but my bf% is pretty low so he was happy
  • transylvaniaxx
    transylvaniaxx Posts: 31
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    Was it hard for you to tell your husband?
  • vzucco
    vzucco Posts: 229
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    My husband fell in love with me when I was very thin, so part of me has been afraid that my weight fluctuations would affect our relationship. They haven't. He's incredibly supportive, I tell him how much I weigh and how much I'm losing, and he always has kind, encouraging words. He tells me I'm beautiful no matter what.

    Having that kind of support from your s.o. can be so amazing and bring you even closer together. It might be hard, but just go for it. He's already with you, already loves you, so a number probably won't mean much to him- definitely not as much as it means to you!
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
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    Telling my husband wasn't hard, but telling my best friend was. She lost 90lbs a few years ago and works out daily. She's amazing, and I was just mortified to tell her what I weighed. Thankfully, I sucked it up and did it, and now she's been a wonderful friend and asset to my weight loss program. I couldn't ask for better support.

    Tell the people you love who support you the truth and let them be there for you. They love you just the same with or without knowing your scale number! :)
  • jmruef
    jmruef Posts: 824 Member
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    I think my DH knows what I weigh.

    Hm. You know, I really don't know if he does or not. He knows what I weighed at my heaviest, though, and at my eating-disordered skinniest. He doesn't seem to care what the number is - he thought I was gorgeous at my heaviest, and when we met (when I was still a tad underweight) he still thought I was gorgeous.

    He knows what my struggles with food were and are, though. I trust him more than anyone else in the world, so I've sort of enlisted him to help me on this whole thing.
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
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    My husband wishes I'd STOP telling him how much I weigh. First I was b*ing because I'd put so much on, then I was bragging about how much I'd lost, and now I am trying to decide whether to maintain or kick it up a notch to get off onther 8-10 lbs.

    But if someone asked him, I'll bet he has no idea what I weigh because I think he stopped listening months ago.
  • sleepytexan
    sleepytexan Posts: 3,138 Member
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    My husband and I report our weight to each other every morning.

    This guy loves you; he doesn't care what your scale says. Don't worry.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    The only time I've ever mentioned it was when he was telling me how I didn't need to lose weight. Otherwise, I keep it to myself. I don't see any reason anyone needs to know what I weigh, aside from my doctor.
  • mamamc03
    mamamc03 Posts: 1,067 Member
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    OH yeah, My hubby and I are doing this together and keep each other updated. When we hear they scale hit the bathroom floor (we keep it propped up so we aren't tempted ALL day) Just tell him. He's into fitness and maybe this will encourage him to keep encouraging you. I meanobviously he thinks you are hot bc he's with you. So dont worry. If he does have a problem with it, screw him! Relationships are about honesty. Best wishes!
  • JDRBT
    JDRBT Posts: 264 Member
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    I think anyone I've ever been in a serious adult relationship with knows how much I weighed. Most of the guys I've dated are like your guy. Lighter and stronger.
    My Sailor is about the same size I am, but a few inches taller, so he wears it better. We keep each other in check Your Boyfriend sounds like he's supportive and might be able to help you stay on track! That's a GOOD thing. It's SO HARD to try to lose weight around someone who has aweful habits themselves.
  • vespaberrie
    vespaberrie Posts: 86 Member
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    Does it really matter? I don't think it's a big issue.
    I mean it's one thing to avoid or lie about it, but if your BF hasen't asked how much you weight why do you feel the need to tell him. I don't think any of my past BF's or the person I'm currently dating have known my weight, not because I'm afraid to tell they, but because the question has never been asked.

    If it's not an issue to him... why torture yourself over it?
  • fridayjustleft04
    fridayjustleft04 Posts: 851 Member
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    I never told my bf how much I weighed. It wasn't his business and he didn't care, so why bother?
  • cspence2270
    cspence2270 Posts: 229 Member
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    It's not just boyfriends/girlfriends I've been married for 5 years and I just told MY HUSBAND how much I weighed 2 months ago- after I started MFP in May. It was extremely hard to tell him because I weighed more than he does. We started working out together in May he was 276 lbs he's now 206 lbs I was 273 and now weigh in at 232 lbs. That was the first and only time he weighed more than me and it didn't last long. Now we keep each other updated daily. Your weight is very personal so don't feel you have to tell him if you don't want to, but I can say it has been nice being able to be open about my weight with him. Now if I could just get comfortable being NEKED in front of him. Maybe another 40 lbs. :wink:
  • MrsSpratt
    MrsSpratt Posts: 200 Member
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    That's between me and the good Lord. Ha. No, really, my husband has an idea, but doesn't know exact numbers.
  • jenniferpayne5
    jenniferpayne5 Posts: 27 Member
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    My husband and I have always been very open about our bodies with one exception, after our kids were born my weight was top classified information. Nowdays, I tell him my successes and failures on and off the scale and he helps to keep me accountable. I found that when I kept my weight a gaurded secret that is when I gained the most and got myself into this situation in the first place. One of my big motivators has been to look good naked and he is the best judge of that. I have a long way to go but he has been a big helper. So dont be afraid. Relationships are about opening up. If you are not vunerable then you are not really being honest with eachother.

    Also, if your boyfriend gives you a hard time, sometimes it is for your own good. My husband's critiques of my body have been good for me even though sometimes it has been painful to hear. Wanting to look good for the person you love and have them like the way you look is good motivation.
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
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    I don't care about the number... everyone can see my size and shape. The number isn't important.
  • Amburle4
    Amburle4 Posts: 2
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    Isn't it crazy that most of us (me included) are so stressed about a number.
    How about you guys compare blood pressures and cholesterol levels instead of weight.

    I mean you can stand two people next to each other who weight exactly the same and because of where they carry the weight they will look completely different.

    Take the stigma out of the number.
    Tell him or don't but don't let that number determine who you are. if you want to tell him just let it slip in casually. Don't give it power by making a big production of it.

    Personally I don't tell people what I weigh because I know how much stigma people hold around numbers. But my BF knows what size to buy me for clothes :-)
  • hcn74
    hcn74 Posts: 214
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    I am reluctant to tell my husband my exact number, but when I think about it, it's not like he's going to be gob-smacked and say "No way! You're fat!?!? I had no idea!". I think my bigger issue is that if I tell him my current weight, he knows how much I've already lost, so he'll know my heaviest, and that's what I'm embarrassed about.

    My husband is kind, supportive, loves me the way I am, so this is definitely my issue, not his. But it is hard.
  • iysys
    iysys Posts: 524
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    my husband does not know my weight. no one but my doctor does. to be honest no one will. it will not do anything to make me feel better about myself or do anything to make me work harder. the actual number of your weight doesn't matter at this point. your choices are all that matter right now. your boyfriend does not care what you weigh. don't hurt yourself by telling him since you obviously don't feel up to it.
  • lobster888
    lobster888 Posts: 861 Member
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    I tell my husband all the time.. but my not anyone else. Isn't that funny?

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