Anyone els dealing with a bad spouse

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stupidthick5150
stupidthick5150 Posts: 39
in Motivation and Support
My husband pisses me off ugh! He knows I’m trying to lose weight. Every time I make progress he wants to try to get me to eat fattening food. He makes me want to smack the crap out of him. It’s like he don’t want me to succeed at all. He is not supportive what so ever. another thing that annoys me is he wants to throw it up in my face how much weight he lost but he don’t want to do nothing to motivate me, It's like he's trying to get me to fall on purpose. is anyone going through the same thing I am???????????????????

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  • kittenzmeow
    kittenzmeow Posts: 11
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    no,

    but it's obvious that he is insecure and that is why he doesn't want you to lose weight.
  • Mariposa187
    Mariposa187 Posts: 344 Member
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    I am not going thru it but my sister in law is. I think it sounds like he doesn't want you to lose weight because he might be insecure? He is afraid when you get to where you want to be you wont want him or he is gonna have to compete for your affections b/c u will draw attention? You being chunky ensures that you are his forever...

    Just speculation but it seems like he is afraid of what may happen if you succeed! Hope it gets better!
  • kwest_4_fitness
    kwest_4_fitness Posts: 819 Member
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    Not going through what you are, but very sorry you can't get support from the one place you should always be able to get it. Can't believe he would intentionally do that to you. Not cool. :huh:
  • L2M1D52
    L2M1D52 Posts: 616 Member
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    I'm sorry you are having to deal with that. It has to be extremely hard. I can't say that I am going through that with my fiance. He's been really supportive. I would have to say an excellent way to find that support is through MFP and adding friends to help keep you accountable. It has really helped me. You can also try for support with other family and friends. Good luck! Prove him wrong and show you can do it!
  • monih10
    monih10 Posts: 578 Member
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    My husband was a little like that when I first started tracking my meals and exercising everyday.....he wasn't very supportive at all....maybe because he didn't think I would stick with it??? who knows?? But.....2 months later and 15 lbs lighter....he is very supportive!! Maybe your hubby just isn't taking you seriously...or maybe he is just insecure?? But anyway....don't let him discourage you....you know what you want and you know what you need to do to succeed!! Add me as a friend if you'd like!
  • nursinggirl64
    nursinggirl64 Posts: 49
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    omg....i can write a book in 1998 i started 2 lose weight b cuz i got asthma with vengance i was miserable n i had 2 do it..literally failure wasnt an option i started getn up at 430am to work out b4 work, went 2 gym aftewr work n joined tops...he got so jealous that i was focusing on me and not him. he put me dwn every chance he got , his mom did too made ignorant remarks.. she will jus gain it back...ignorant crap at midnite order a pizza...my weakness,...well he lost his eatn buddy...after i lost 88lbs in 11 months he said i didnt tell you 2 lose wt...like that mattered 2 me.. annalized my body well ur arms r still fat...jus assinign crap///so let me tell u...dont let him get u down or belittle u im getn divorced n have the most sweet, loving man who tells me im sexy every single day...but, im gonna tell u something..u may have 2 make a decision one of these days what u want more in ur life?...good luck gf
  • hazelnut861
    hazelnut861 Posts: 390 Member
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    I am not going thru it but my sister in law is. I think it sounds like he doesn't want you to lose weight because he might be insecure? He is afraid when you get to where you want to be you wont want him or he is gonna have to compete for your affections b/c u will draw attention? You being chunky ensures that you are his forever...

    Just speculation but it seems like he is afraid of what may happen if you succeed! Hope it gets better!
    I totally agree. My husband was kinda insecure when I started to lose weight and workout a lot. He thought the only reason I was doing it was because I wanted to strip again lol. I assured him and explained all the reasons I need to be hotness with him and now I go to the gym at night without an ear full of crap. It wasn't an option. I was doing it no matter what he thought. He's very supportive now. But I am very grumpy when I don't get to go. So I think that if you what to live a certain way and that doesn't work with him then a lot of things between you won't work. I also think his actions reflect what he's feeling inside and they need to be talked about. Good luck. Don't give up your happiness to appease someone else.
  • Nic620
    Nic620 Posts: 553 Member
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    My hubby isn't that way but I'm sorry yours is being a s$@t head! Get him out of your head. You can do this. You have all of us here for support. I know we can't take the place of your husband cheering you on but were a nice back up! Don't trip potato chip...you got this! I'm always happy to add friends if you need more supporters cheering you on!

    Nic
  • Tazz71
    Tazz71 Posts: 19
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    I'm not experiencing what you are but if you haven't already, have a heart to heart. Communication is key to any relationship and it's apparent he's uncomfortable with your decision to make such a positive change. You mentioned he's lost weight too. Have you tried working on this healthy lifestyle change together, i.e. workout together, plan healthy meals together and contests for who can make the tastiest healthiest meals, stuff like that. Keep striving and focusing on your health goals but instead of trying to figure out why he's treating you the way he is and speculating, ask him. You might be surprised at his true reason. Good luck and be blessed.
  • stupidthick5150
    stupidthick5150 Posts: 39
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    thanks you just made my day:) your a strong woman I'm glad to hear you didn't let him discourage you and I'm happy you found real love :):)
  • stupidthick5150
    stupidthick5150 Posts: 39
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    thanks for the advice :) Im gonna keep doing me weather he likes it or not
  • Scorpioangel
    Scorpioangel Posts: 951 Member
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    That sucks girl and I am sorry. What others posted about the insecurity I think is unfortunately true. I have had to deal with the same thing I think and didn't want to admit it until others told me. Sometimes I find it hard to see what is so clear for others. I just kept at it though and didn't let it stop me. All the comments, etc. just motivated me even more! :) Keep doing your thing girl!
  • Dawn_is_getting_healthy
    Dawn_is_getting_healthy Posts: 245
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    Well, I'm using the computer that is displayed on our 52 inch tv, so since my DH is sitting here with me, I will say that I have no idea what you're talking about!! But, between you and me, he is pretty annoying at times. He is naturally thin (we're like Jack Sprat and his wife!!). Watching him SHOVEL cheese balls into his mouth while I only have 89 calories left for the day is pretty rough sometimes. Especially when he only seems to have something to say when his mouth is full of food. Really?

    Good luck, Sweetie!! Don't let the turkeys get you down!
  • jilleebean777
    jilleebean777 Posts: 230 Member
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    I know how you feel, my husband can be the same way. He would want to go out to eat, buffets, etc. And he was never supportive with my exercise, eating, etc. He always says "I'm not goint to eat "diet food", I'm going to eat what I want" and make it seem like I was doing something wrong, or depriving myself (which I don't!) He has gotten better recently, he has joined the gym too, and is on his way to eating better. So sometimes things change. You just need to stay positive and find positive people to chat with and vent to.
  • 1RareJewel
    1RareJewel Posts: 440 Member
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    I know what I'm about to say is not right, but my BF/BD does me the same way sometimes. I workout more and eat less and I cook different meals for us me, him, and my kids). I make sure I pile his plate with food, buy sweet cakes and cookies (he loves sweets), and sodas. I know it isn't right but he has gained so much weight and he doesn't understand why. Oh he wears the weight well though. The little devil on my left shoulder loves it but the Angel on right shoulder, well you know the rest.....llllllollllll
  • stupidthick5150
    stupidthick5150 Posts: 39
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    lol thanks for the support :)

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