I'm a mean sister...

NinjaMonkey201
NinjaMonkey201 Posts: 123 Member
edited October 2024 in Fitness and Exercise
So, I'm a mean sister (and I don't care).

Before I became pregnant, I was training for a triathlon. I had the time, the money, and the patience. After all the weight I gained during my pregnancy (87 lbs), I gave up on it.

My sister is turning 30 in March and she told me she wants us to do a triathlon together, so she's accomplished something before turning 30. I know her, and I know she won't do it. She's extremely active, always has been. When she was younger, she was in gymnastics AND ballet. Now that she's older, summertime it's beach volleyball and rock climbing every weekend. During the winter, it's snowboarding and indoor volleyball (and indoor climbing).

She's young, active, very fit, but I know she won't do the traithlon because she'll forget about it. VB and boarding will take over and before she knows it, she'll be 30 and be saying "damn, I wanted to do.... before now".

Now, a nice, good, big sister would keep on her and make sure she's training and staying on schedule and keeping her head into it.
Instead, I'm hoping she fails. Hence, the "I'm a mean sister". But it's with good reason. I want to do something she hasn't done! She does everything. She's fit and active enough to do it all. I'm not, but I want to be.

So, while I'm training, I'm not saying a word to her about it. While she's off playing volleyball and getting her snowboard ready, I'm preparing my training schedule. So when sringtime comes again, I'll be ready for race day, and she'll be remembering that she was supposed to do it.

My sister turns 30 in March, and I plan to do my very first duathlon. Without her!

(Duathlon because finances and toddlerhood keep me away from the pool to train)

Thanks for letting me vent. :-)

Replies

  • sjtreely
    sjtreely Posts: 1,014 Member
    Wow. Just wow for now.
  • yager8725
    yager8725 Posts: 267 Member
    Your a stinker!! make it into something special the two of you do together! if she blows of training with you then DO IT WITHOUT HER AND SHOW OFF THE TSHIRT YOU GET!!! i have a little bratty sister too!
  • sassylilmama
    sassylilmama Posts: 1,493 Member
    Sibling rivalry at its best!
  • lil_pulp
    lil_pulp Posts: 701 Member
    Better yet, you could help her train and then break her legs the day before the triathlon!
  • sassylilmama
    sassylilmama Posts: 1,493 Member
    Better yet, you could help her train and then break her legs the day before the triathlon!

    :laugh:
  • Jeneba
    Jeneba Posts: 699 Member
    Sorry I am laughing.... Oh my goodness!
  • ShannonMarie81
    ShannonMarie81 Posts: 88 Member
    Your a stinker!! make it into something special the two of you do together! if she blows of training with you then DO IT WITHOUT HER AND SHOW OFF THE TSHIRT YOU GET!!! i have a little bratty sister too!

    I agree...try and include her in it...or at least tell her of your plans..if you know she is going to blow it off anyway...you will still have accomplished something wonderful that she hasn't...but you won't have to worry about the chance at feeling guilty that you didn't even mention it to her.
  • Gigi_licious
    Gigi_licious Posts: 1,185 Member
    Oh my
  • Majunta
    Majunta Posts: 575 Member
    I wouldn't say you're mean...a little jealous maybe.

    Who cares what she does? Big deal.
  • StrengthIsBeautiful
    StrengthIsBeautiful Posts: 303 Member
    If your sister would be gone tomorrow, would you be happy with what you just wrote?
    Having mean feelings isn't wrong.
    Acting on them is.
    It's your sister. And life can change in the blink of an eye.
    Do what you have to do, but do it with love in your heart.
  • andrialindsay
    andrialindsay Posts: 55 Member
    Look, its sorta an ugly emotion honeslty. we are only human, and we dont always act or feel perfectly, even when we know its wrong. BUT I FEEL THAT WAY SOMETIMES TOO. . My sister is one of my best friends, but for awhile I started to feel like every time I accomplished something she would find a way to one up me and I would be put on the back burner again. For example when I finally hit my goal weight her tiny 96lb self went and got a boob job and ended up on the cover of a magazine in a bikini, and thats all my family could talk about! How great she looked. I felt awful. But the reality is, I was proud of myself, I worked hard, and who cares. She deserves the spotlight too, just like your sister does. I bet you have attributes that she does not!! Ones that I'm sure she admires/wishes she had. Be there for her without putting yourself out, do the marathon, finish and feel good about it. No matter if she does it or not.
  • OSUloulou
    OSUloulou Posts: 74 Member
    I have a sister like yours too....but she is older. If she motivates you to kick it into high gear to complete a triathlon, then go for it! Nobody said you have to train with her. As far as I am concerned you are "training" together..... she is just your motivation:) Stay with it, I am pulling for you!!! As far as being the mean sister.... if she wants it as bad as she says (as bad as you) she won't need you reminding her.
  • jamiealdridge02
    jamiealdridge02 Posts: 93 Member
    I have a younger sister too. She has always been the cute one. I had my first baby at 23 and resigned from my job. I am fit, but she is really thin and fit. But ya know what, she is my sister and my best friend. I want her to have all the success in the world. We trained for our first half marathon together and we were supposed to do our first marathon together last spring. She got her and couldn't do it. I was so sad when I crossed that line and didnt have my siter with me. She's doing her first marathon this morning and I'm so proud of her. You and your sister are different people. I understand the feeling of "my sister is fit,etc. I want to do something...." but she can be a big encouragement and you to her. I hope you work through your jealousy to encourage your sister and I bet you'll have a lot more fun. I wish my sister could have trained with me last spring...those long runs and rides get a little boring without someone with you.
  • Sidesteal
    Sidesteal Posts: 5,510 Member
    I'm not judging, but.....

    that's some straight gangsta *kitten*.
  • kb455
    kb455 Posts: 679 Member
    If your sister would be gone tomorrow, would you be happy with what you just wrote?
    Having mean feelings isn't wrong.
    Acting on them is.
    It's your sister. And life can change in the blink of an eye.
    Do what you have to do, but do it with love in your heart.

    I agree with this. I have two sisters and the three of us are very competitive with one another sometimes. But NEVER in a vindictive way. I can't imagine wanting to see either of them FAIL, or hoping for it.
  • NinjaMonkey201
    NinjaMonkey201 Posts: 123 Member
    For those of you who got what I was tryng to say... Thank You!
    For those that didn't... Never Mind!
  • Giantess
    Giantess Posts: 213 Member
    Hee hee, I get it. Add me to the "super skinny successful little sister (yoga guru, trained with tae quon do olympic team, speaks three languages including Mandarin, lived abroad in Asia, made exactly 90% more than I did in her last job)" crowd.

    Also to the "Sister is Best Friend" crowd.

    That's just sisterhood. Love each other, be jealous of each other.

    She's jealous of me for my good health, job satisfaction, and successful relationships.

    You're not a mean sister. I totally get it.
    :bigsmile:
  • SmartFunGorgeous
    SmartFunGorgeous Posts: 699 Member
    I understand. I truly do.

    And honestly, I don't think you're MEAN for not reminding another adult what she should be doing.

    Having said that, I'd still want my sister(s) along. It's so much more fun when you've got someone else beside you. It won't take away from YOUR accomplishment one little bit, I PROMISE!

    My baby sister (the one on the right) , coming back to run with me (middle) to the finish line on her first, my second, 5k:

    RunforaSoldierFinishline-1.jpg

    That's right. It was my second race, and she beat me to the finish line by about fifteen minutes, even though it was her first race.

    She almost didn't come back, because she thought that I'd want MY moment at the finish line.

    But it meant way more to me that she came and ran with me.

    Include your sister. You won't regret it.
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
    You make me glad I only have brothers.

    Good luck with your training though.
  • catlady100
    catlady100 Posts: 154 Member
    I understand. I truly do.

    And honestly, I don't think you're MEAN for not reminding another adult what she should be doing.

    Having said that, I'd still want my sister(s) along. It's so much more fun when you've got someone else beside you. It won't take away from YOUR accomplishment one little bit, I PROMISE!

    My baby sister (the one on the right) , coming back to run with me (middle) to the finish line on her first, my second, 5k:

    RunforaSoldierFinishline-1.jpg

    That's right. It was my second race, and she beat me to the finish line by about fifteen minutes, even though it was her first race.

    She almost didn't come back, because she thought that I'd want MY moment at the finish line.

    But it meant way more to me that she came and ran with me.

    Include your sister. You won't regret it.

    that brought a tear to my eye.
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,137 Member
    I hope your sister wins the race. :flowerforyou:
  • godblessourhome
    godblessourhome Posts: 3,892 Member
    i get the vent because i could feel that way about my siblings occasionally.

    i'm the oldest and i had to get a job at 14 to buy my own car; my sister got a receptionist job at 16, which my mom worked for her but gave her the money and my parents bought her a car; and my brother never had to work during high school while my parents bought him, and his girlfriend, a car. to this day, my mom buys my brothers' kids stuff all the time and still pays for my 30-year-old sister credit card but never gives us money (we probably wouldn't accept it anyway, but still... it can hurt when we think our sibling is more favored than we are). it's crazy sometimes.

    but i think you will feel bad about the sneaky way you are trying to 'beat' your sister at something and i think it will diminish the joy you feel in your accomplishment.

    my mom, my sister and i (all non-runners) wanted to run a 5k for prostate cancer in memory of my dad last year. i trained each week. i called my mom and pushed her to train. i heard lots of excuses. i called my sister and pushed her to train. i heard lots of excuses. finally, with 3 weeks before the race, my mom started to train. my sister never did and decided not to do the race with my mom and i. i could have run the whole thing, but i stayed with my mom, running 1 minute and walking 1 minute. i felt good about myself for calling my sister and my mom each week, and my sister has to live with the disappointment that she didn't make the time to meet a goal she set for herself.

    good luck in your training.
  • sweetsarahj
    sweetsarahj Posts: 701 Member
    You know what's sad? That she wanted to do it WITH YOU and you are purposefully wanting to do it without her just to SHOW HER UP!

    Jealous much?

    A good sister would say, "hey listen, I don't think you're motivated enough to do this. So I'm going to do it with, or without you."
  • Slinkybaz
    Slinkybaz Posts: 312 Member
    Wow, makes me glad I'm an only child. Perfect example of You can choose your friends, but not your family.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,924 Member
    It's going to be pretty hard to keep quiet about your training until March, isn't it? If she trains, she trains. If she doesn't, it's not your problem.
  • california_peach
    california_peach Posts: 1,809 Member
    My big sister was born with Spina Bifida. She cannot have children. She cannot run. Heck some days she can barely walk. She can't do much, so I do it for her and share with her as best I can. One of the biggest joys of my life was the joy she got from just learning that I was going to have children. I cannot even begin describe the joy she expresses and feels being their aunt. Again, what she cannot do I do for her and I am so glad that she has never been jealous of all the things that I get to do that she will never get to do.

    Thanks for the perspective.I am going to go call my sister and thank her and tell her how much I love her and how wonderful she is.
  • DWilbanks
    DWilbanks Posts: 420 Member
    I get what you're saying. You want something to own, your own accomplishment that you don't have to share. But look at it like this. You already said you have more weight than you're sister, therefore you crossing the finish line is more of a accomplishment whether she crosses it before or after you. Sometimes it's not about looking to see who won, but who had the biggest battle to win.
  • AloyMomNwife
    AloyMomNwife Posts: 146 Member
    bump
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