Preparing for a tongue lashing here...

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luwalmsley1983
luwalmsley1983 Posts: 98
in Health and Weight Loss
Hi everyone,

Firstly, I don't post much - I'm sorry but I'll try to be more active. Please help.

I have no idea why - as I am very sensible - I have successfully lost weight before (lots) and since putting a bit back on and trying to lost it - I have on a personal level, lost it!

Ididn't lose for a while, then gained a bit, this last week I decided to drop to 1000 cals a day just to try to get things moving, it hasn't worked. I'm exercising to keep metabolism up - and have lost a pound (brilliant, I know it's not a gain and I should be bloomin happ - but I'm not :cry: )

When I exercise I can't get my head around eating the "extra" calories I gain from doing it. I'm obsessing over every little thing I eat in case "thats" the thing that is making me not lose.

I'm struggling, tired, frustrated and upset that my plan appears to be taking over my life.

I'm also very sorry for the moan. If you can help though - please, please give me some direction. I'm not thinking of packing it in - yet - I just need to know how to sort this out and get to a point where I'm happy with the amount I eat, exercise enough and just generally start to see a steady loss.

Thank you, Lucy xxx:flowerforyou:

Replies

  • luwalmsley1983
    luwalmsley1983 Posts: 98
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    By the way - I have today put my limits back up to 1200 - as thats what MFP says I need. But I'm sitting here now, thinking of not going up to that today. Argh.
  • schmorla
    schmorla Posts: 77 Member
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    Are you hungry after exercising?

    If your not hungry then don't eat your exercise calories. If you are then eat.

    But you should be aiming for 1200 a day atleast.
  • luwalmsley1983
    luwalmsley1983 Posts: 98
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    Are you hungry after exercising?

    If your not hungry then don't eat your exercise calories. If you are then eat.

    But you should be aiming for 1200 a day atleast.

    Thanks for the reply, sometimes but not always - and if I do eat I just feel guilty about it. And that I wasted the exercise - even though I "know" that I'm way under how I was eating to gain a stone back in the first place.
  • 1a1a
    1a1a Posts: 761 Member
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    Don't forget that at 1200 you are Already in deficit *insert multiple lines under already*.

    Perhaps if you really like to see your calories in the green, change your settings to maintenance, then aim for a deficit every day of 500 (be that through eating less or exercising or both).

    There are always exceptions but we are meant to eat, the body needs it, and that food is going to fuel you to do more exercise and improve your fitness level.

    If you're really scared of eating more, just try it for a few weeks, if you find you have gained in that time then you have a justification to try eating less, however, if you lose in that time, that'll be pretty rad right?

    Edit: I started exercising so I could eat more but after a while realised that exercising is taxing and increases the body's need for fuel, you would only be wasting exercise calories earnt by eating them if you were eating at maintenance levels already, that's how I look at it anyway.
  • kellyisloved
    kellyisloved Posts: 441 Member
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    You don't have to eat back the calories if your aim is to lose weight rather than building muscle, but you don't want to cut yourself short day after day. The warning mfp puts up when you come in under 1200 really is a good one. Everyone is different, and you'll hear different opinions from everyone (including experts), but most of what I've seen indicates that when you do start eating less than that, you're much more likely to start a plateau and not find yourself losing much weight. I've seen enough people struggle with that to believe it completely, so I really would suggest sticking with at least 1200.

    Just my two cents :) Good luck! I really hope you get past this point fast. I know it's a horrible place to be when you get that frustrated.
  • Frankenbarbie01
    Frankenbarbie01 Posts: 432 Member
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    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/6556-the-answers-to-the-questions?page=1

    Take a read at this. I have just recently looked honestly at what I have been eating and was eating way too few calories. I had the same thought "well if I just cut back here, or dont eat all of my cals who's it hurting?" a 3lb gain in the past month......SO ME!!

    calculate your BMR and eat NO LESS than that. Dont starve yourself (unintentionally) to try to do better but cutting, you only compromise your health =)
  • kir911
    kir911 Posts: 228 Member
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    I would tell you that not eating does not help you. Your body needs fuel to burn and to run effectively, if you don't fuel it you could cause a gain because it is storing everything because you are not giving it enough calories. AKA Starvation Mode. You don't want to do that. I would tell you to not go below 1200 calories as a base line, and if you are exercising you should eat more. I would suggest eating smaller amounts more often, A meal, a snack, a meal, a snack, a meal, a snack. Eat every 2-3 hrs
    I know you are scared to eat, but your body will respond. Eating like this does not allow your body to have those extreme blood sugar highs and lows which will cause you to gain instead of lose. Or not lose/platueau. Hopefully this helps!
  • asyouseefit
    asyouseefit Posts: 1,265 Member
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    You should try to use MFP to develop a healthy relationship with food. Do you feel guilty after refueling your car? Nope. Then you shouldn't feel guilty about eating. Your body needs nutrients to function. :)
  • jcandidi1
    jcandidi1 Posts: 35 Member
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    First, if there was ever aa place to moan this is it. A lot of people are dealing with the same struggles daily... don't ever be sorry. May I ask what it is you are eating daily... you may just have to clean up your eats instead of cut them. Cutting your calories is a dangerous thing. If you stay at a thousand... how long before you drop yourself down to 800 or 900.
    What does your work out regiment look like? Sometime a plateau does happen... its annoying when it does, but you just have to push through it and look on the bright side. I may have not lost any weight this week... but I didn't gain either!
  • killagb
    killagb Posts: 3,280 Member
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    My advice is eat more. Eat as much unprocessed food as possible.
  • luwalmsley1983
    luwalmsley1983 Posts: 98
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    Don't forget that at 1200 you are Already in deficit *insert multiple lines under already*.

    Perhaps if you really like to see your calories in the green, change your settings to maintenance, then aim for a deficit every day of 500 (be that through eating less or exercising or both).

    There are always exceptions but we are meant to eat, the body needs it, and that food is going to fuel you to do more exercise and improve your fitness level.

    If you're really scared of eating more, just try it for a few weeks, if you find you have gained in that time then you have a justification to try eating less, however, if you lose in that time, that'll be pretty rad right?

    Edit: I started exercising so I could eat more but after a while realised that exercising is taxing and increases the body's need for fuel, you would only be wasting exercise calories earnt by eating them if you were eating at maintenance levels already, that's how I look at it anyway.

    Hi there hun, thank you for the suggestion. OK I have set to maintain a it gives me 1710 a day. I will try, I swear to eat 1200 a day. I'll keep you posted on how this is going... it's got to be better than keep feeling like I'm failing. I'm hoping this will give me a reality check - just seeing that I['d have to go over 1710 o gain (I'd never go over that figure!!!) has already given a bit of perspective. Thank you, thank you x
  • killagb
    killagb Posts: 3,280 Member
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    Trust that eating a bit more will show results even if it doesn't seem intuitive.
  • luwalmsley1983
    luwalmsley1983 Posts: 98
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    Don't forget that at 1200 you are Already in deficit *insert multiple lines under already*.

    Perhaps if you really like to see your calories in the green, change your settings to maintenance, then aim for a deficit every day of 500 (be that through eating less or exercising or both).

    There are always exceptions but we are meant to eat, the body needs it, and that food is going to fuel you to do more exercise and improve your fitness level.

    If you're really scared of eating more, just try it for a few weeks, if you find you have gained in that time then you have a justification to try eating less, however, if you lose in that time, that'll be pretty rad right?

    Edit: I started exercising so I could eat more but after a while realised that exercising is taxing and increases the body's need for fuel, you would only be wasting exercise calories earnt by eating them if you were eating at maintenance levels already, that's how I look at it anyway.

    Re the edit - I think that I'm just not going to log the exercise and try and at in a bit more of a "balanced" way - within the 1300 - 1500 range, still exercise... and see what happens. I'm giving it until mid November.
  • hazelnut861
    hazelnut861 Posts: 390 Member
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    You must eat the minimum. It will be stressed repeatedly. It's not bad. Eating under is counter productive. When I platued I switched up my calorie intake for a few weeks and then increased it. And i've dropped 4 more pounds in like a month since doing it. This doesn't defeat the purpose of exercise at all. You're getting stronger when you work out.and the more muscle you build the more you'll burn sitting on your butt. And that's pretty awesome! :) so eat healthy and be strong. How you feel when you look at yourself has more bearing than a number. Example: im 4 pounds lighter than prepregnancy weight but looked better with the muscle definition I had before. Also one of the hardest things for me was developing a healthy relationship with food. Work on this and the rest will be easier.
  • seph_house
    seph_house Posts: 101 Member
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    (removing duplicate, d'oh)
  • seph_house
    seph_house Posts: 101 Member
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    sounds like you know the theory about eating more to lose weight, as everyone here is telling you, you are just a bit scared to do it...

    the lovely thing about the way this site is set up, especially if you are a bit meticulous about logging everything as it sounds like you are, is that you can experiment with how your body is reacting to changes. if a temporary drop in cals didn't work, can you get your head to accept a temporary gain in cals to monitor what that does? i'd advocate upping to around 1500 for a month but even a couple of weeks will tell you something about how your body like that. if you can't get your head around "eating exercise cals" this approach might help you find a level where you are eating the exercise cals but your head doesn't rebel against it.

    good luck, hon :)

    (disclaimer: after a weekend off a couple of weeks ago, i've been hungry & snacking (on fruit/nuts etc) a bit and regularly going 100/150cals over target, i've been surprised that my weight loss has *sped up* though it's a bit early to tell:))
  • girlinahat
    girlinahat Posts: 2,956 Member
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    to be quite honest it sounds like you are beginning to develop an unhealthy relationship with food. I know you want to lose weight, but is being unhappy and obsessing about everything you eat really worth it?

    It also sounds like you are not getting the right nutrients which is one of the reasons you are feeling so anxious about it. And that probably means you need to eat more. You shouldn't be approaching your meals worrying about how they are affecting your weight, but should be approaching food as if you enjoy the taste and how it makes you full of energy.

    get tons of veggies into your diet and up the protein. I find if I eat a more protein-based diet with a lot of veggies I feel much more energetic on less calories. OR you may feel better if you are more grain-based - whole grains and tons of veggies.

    Forget about what different foods might be stopping you from losing weight - it's not individual foods but could be the approach to food that is stopping you. Upping your calories sounds like a very good plan too - especially if you are putting in the exercise - you could even change your activity level and see what the calories give you.

    Good luck and please remember - food should be fun!!
  • luwalmsley1983
    luwalmsley1983 Posts: 98
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    Hi all,

    Can I please say a big thank you - as I'm not an active poster I really didn't expct all of the lovely support and it has helped I am - genuinely - going to try to eat a bit more - particularly since I have put myself on the maintenance so I can keep within the green and not have to do that battle with my head. If it thinks I have to go over 1710 to gain, I know, truly I'm never going to go anywhere near that figure (at least not more than once a month - at least now I know I can go out for a meal and eat!).

    It was really depressing me - all I was thinking about as food - and that's not good. I just get worried as I've had all sorts of issues (from undereating at 19 - and I was starting to "enjoy" the empty feeling again and treating it as accomplihment. Very scary indeed) to overeating and ending up borderline obese at 23. So I just knew I needed to talk to someone about it.

    Thank you people. :smile:
  • lottycat
    lottycat Posts: 333 Member
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    I've developed a bit of a food obsession too... What I'm trying to do is to think a little less about the calories and eat three nutritious meals a day. I stay away from most processed food, I eat tonnes of fruit and veggies and top up my protien with protein powder (I'm veggie, so it's sometimes a little low). It's just a matter of being sensible. We all know deep down what we should and shouldn't be eating, just go with your instints a bit :)

    Good luck x

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