experiences with failed SHORT marriage
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Posts: 6,897 Member
if you had one...
1. how long did it last?
2. why did it end?
3. how old were you when it happened?
4. how long were the 2 of you together?
5. are you currently dating/married to someone else?
6. how long did it take to just move on?
ADDED:
7. do you regret it?
8. did you learn anything valuable?
9. do you feel judged because of it (by friends/family/new relationship prospects)?
10. do you have kids with the person?
1. how long did it last?
2. why did it end?
3. how old were you when it happened?
4. how long were the 2 of you together?
5. are you currently dating/married to someone else?
6. how long did it take to just move on?
ADDED:
7. do you regret it?
8. did you learn anything valuable?
9. do you feel judged because of it (by friends/family/new relationship prospects)?
10. do you have kids with the person?
0
Replies
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if you had one...
1. how long did it last.....6 years
2. why did it end?......He wasn't involved in the marriage. I felt like a single mother, so decided to be one.
3. how old were you when it happened?.......25
4. how long were the 2 of you together?......8 years
5. are you currently dating/married to someone else?.......been with my guy for 5 years next month.
6. how long did it take to just move on?..... I met my guy a month after I moved out, and he met his wife the night I moved out.0 -
How long is short?0
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Yes I did..
1. how long did it last? 2 years and 1 month
2. why did it end? Sooo many reasons. Two of which being infidelity and physical/emotional abuse/controlling behaviour.
3. how old were you when it happened? 26 when we married, 28 when I left with our 1 month old baby.
4. how long were the 2 of you together? total of about 3 1/2 years
5. are you currently dating/married to someone else? Yes. He's AWESOME.
6. how long did it take to just move on? I would change this question to "how long did it take me to heal". My answer would be about 2 years before I realized what I wanted and how to let someone new into my life completely.
Great questions. Curious, why do you ask?0 -
1. how long did it last?
Legally: 17 months. In reality, 11-ish months.
2. why did it end?
I had nothing left to give. I gave and he took; end of story. He wanted another mother, not a wife.
3. how old were you when it happened?
Married at 20, divorced at 21.
4. how long were the 2 of you together?
3 years total.
5. are you currently dating/married to someone else?
Engaged to a man I dated before I met my ex-husband.
6. how long did it take to just move on?
I had moved on before we even got divorced.0 -
1. how long did it last? Just shy of 4 years
2. why did it end? He wouldn't stop cheating and I started treating him bad, I dreaded a future with him
3. how old were you when it happened? 25
4. how long were the 2 of you together? 5 years
5. are you currently dating/married to someone else? No
6. how long did it take to just move on? I had moved on emotionally before the marriage was over, I've been divorced over a year and just haven't found someone I want to be with. We separated for 4 months a year prior to the divorce, I would say that's when I started to move on, so it took about a year to just move on.0 -
1. how long did it last? 2 years
2. why did it end? he was a drug addict who wouldn't change and I married because I thought I didn't deserve better
3. how old were you when it happened? We separated when I was 30
4. how long were the 2 of you together? 11 years
5. are you currently dating/married to someone else? happily married
6. how long did it take to just move on? I met my current husband just after I separated from my ex0 -
thanks for sharing...and short is whatever you decide. if you feel like it was short then it was0
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1. how long did it last? 6 months (yes, Britney lasted more than me)
2. why did it end? He had lots of emotional issues and he was agressive and disrespectful towards me, but must important I wasn't in love wiith him.
3. how old were you when it happened? 23
4. how long were the 2 of you together? 2 years before getting married, he showed his true colors afterwards
5. are you currently dating/married to someone else? Yes happily married to the love of my life
6. how long did it take to just move on? Honestly very fast, cause I didn't love him
ADDED:
7. do you regret it? Yes and no
8. did you learn anything valuable? What things I truly want in partner for life and father for my children
9. do you feel judged because of it (by friends/family/new relationship prospects)? By family (not immediate) and friends, but my actual husband never minded because we have similar histories.
10. do you have kids with the person? Thank God no!0 -
My husband was married for 8 months when he was 24. He said that he had reservations even before the marriage but still went through with it. From what I can tell they were just two very different people who made a mistake. They didn't have any kids and he moved on pretty fast. But he didn't remarry for another ten years. Maybe because he was gun-shy, but I like to think it's because he hadn't met me yet. :-)0
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if you had one...
1. how long did it last? Not married but lasted 6 1/2 years
2. why did it end? Several reasons but the biggest ones were His needs/wants came before everything even his own children and the emotional abuse I suffered. He never really showed me he wanted to get married he was more interested in the "rockstar" lifestyle.
3. how old were you when it happened? I was 25 he was 20 when we got together, 31 and 26 when it ended.
4. how long were the 2 of you together? 6 1/2 years
5. are you currently dating/married to someone else? No but did have 1 relationship since the split over a year ago but he was also emotionally unstable in the middle of a divorce and was unsure about what he wanted.
6. how long did it take to just move on? about 4 months but still lonely, but not for him lol
ADDED:
7. do you regret it? Honestly yes and no. Very conflicted and complicated feelings. I do wish I would have valued myself enough to leave after I caught him lying to me the first few times, and believing I deserved someone who would respect me but the only reason I don't is because of my girls. But in a way I still regreat it because he is a dead beat dad who puts his new girlfriend above his kids and THEY deserve a better father.
8. did you learn anything valuable? Once a liar/cheater/thief always one
9. do you feel judged because of it (by friends/family/new relationship prospects)? No not really, my family only tolerated him because they thought I was happy. They are glad I wised up and moved on and reassure me all the time that the right one for me is out there, just waiting for me as I am waiting for him They are more convinced I will find my foerever after then I am lol
10. do you have kids with the person? Yes, 3 girls0 -
1. how long did it last? 6 years before separation
2. why did it end? He was a cruel husband
3. how old were you when it happened? We married when I was 25, separated at 31.
4. how long were the 2 of you together? 8 years total
5. are you currently dating/married to someone else? yes
6. how long did it take to just move on? not long, but I was ready for the divorce for a few years before we separated
ADDED:
7. do you regret it? I regret not divorcing sooner
8. did you learn anything valuable? yes, never settle, stand up for yourself, ALWAYS ask friends and family what they think.
9. do you feel judged because of it (by friends/family/new relationship prospects)? The friends that judged me are not friends anymore. Most support and welcome this change.
10. do you have kids with the person? Two beautiful babies.0 -
Not final yet, but I'll answer...
1. how long did it last? We were "married" 6 years in August, when we discovered we wanted the separation/divorce.
2. why did it end? He wanted both me AND his girlfriend. He didn't want to committ to just one of us. I deserve to be with a man who loves me completely.
Edited: he had a history of cheating on me, so it wasn't a sudden thing. I just had the ability to love myself enough to do better and not live like this the rest of my life.
3. how old were you when it happened? Me - 28, Him - 30.
4. how long were the 2 of you together? Since I was 17. So 11 years.
5. are you currently dating/married to someone else? Not dating anyone. He's dating girlfriend.
6. how long did it take to just move on? Still movin' on.
ADDED:
7. do you regret it? No. I'm going to live a lonely single life, but a happy one. This time I don't have to settle.
8. did you learn anything valuable? Yes, lots.
9. do you feel judged because of it (by friends/family/new relationship prospects)? Oh yeah. Many people do not even know were separated. We plan on dropping the news after Christmas to extended family members.
10. do you have kids with the person? Yes, 3 sons.0 -
if you had one...
1. how long did it last?
2. why did it end?
3. how old were you when it happened?
4. how long were the 2 of you together?
5. are you currently dating/married to someone else?
6. how long did it take to just move on?
ADDED:
7. do you regret it?
8. did you learn anything valuable?
9. do you feel judged because of it (by friends/family/new relationship prospects)?
10. do you have kids with the person?
1. 4 years of marriage
2. I shouldn't have married him in the first place
3. Single @ 28
4. 6 years
5. Nope
6. Move on meaning what? I'm still single 2 years later, but was able to date (should an appropriate specimen present himself) probably within about 6 months.
7. Heck no
8. yes - Not to marry the wrong guy!
9. Initially I felt judged by his family and my extended family, but they got over it.
10. Yep, a 5 year old girl who looks like him but thinks like me.0 -
10. Yep, a 5 year old girl who looks like him but thinks like me.
Ha! Mine's 3 and she looks like him and thinks/acts/speaks/makes jokes exactly like me (thank god) xx0 -
if you had one...
1. how long did it last? 4 years 2 months
2. why did it end? He treated everyone like gold, me like crap.
3. how old were you when it happened? 27
4. how long were the 2 of you together? 10 years
5. are you currently dating/married to someone else? Its complicated
6. how long did it take to just move on? I had emotionally moved on before he moved out.
ADDED:
7. do you regret it? I have my days. He's a good guy, we just should never have married.
8. did you learn anything valuable? So many things. I deserve to be happy and loved and emotionally connected to a great guy.
9. do you feel judged because of it (by friends/family/new relationship prospects)? Yes, everyday. But I don't care now. I used to feel like I was letting everyone down. Now I just see that I can actually be happy!
10. do you have kids with the person? 2 wonderful daughter!0 -
1. how long did it last? 10 years... (not exactly short, but not as long as I was expecting)
2. why did it end? I left because I couldn't take the abuse (both mentally and physically) The last straw was getting hit in the head with a full pitcher of iced tea, which cut me open pretty good. She had an overactive thyroid that she never wanted to take medicine for.
3. how old were you when it happened? married at 28, divorced at 38, she was 5 years younger.
4. how long were the 2 of you together? 11 years
5. are you currently dating/married to someone else? Define dating...
6. how long did it take to just move on? I was emotionally detached from her by the 5 year mark, but I tried to stay in it until the kids went off to college. I finally realized that I wasn't going to make it that long. When I finally separated, I knew I didn't ever want her back, but I don't think I ever really moved on.
ADDED:
7. do you regret it? I only regret not leaving sooner. I wasted so much of my life in that stupid sham of a marriage.
8. did you learn anything valuable? Yeah, I'm not going to settle next time...if there is ever a next time.
9. do you feel judged because of it (by friends/family/new relationship prospects)? No, my whole family doesn't like her, so I was supported in my decision 100%.
10. do you have kids with the person? 2 kids (1 boy - 11, 1 girl - 15)0 -
if you had one...
1. how long did it last? less then a year
2. why did it end? his 16 year old GF and what might have been their baby and I got fed up with getting beaten up and bones broken every other day.
3. how old were you when it happened? 21
4. how long were the 2 of you together? 6 years
5. are you currently dating/married to someone else? engaged to be wed in 2013
6. how long did it take to just move on? just over 5 years and 200 pounds
ADDED:
7. do you regret it? yes and no I wish I would not have lost me in the deal and to never let a man/boy take me away from me!
8. did you learn anything valuable? STAY TRUE TO YOU even if you have to fight to be true YOU MATTER!!
9. do you feel judged because of it (by friends/family/new relationship prospects)? yes my mother is still trying to get me to go back with him
10. do you have kids with the person? No Thankfully,0 -
1. how long did it last? 9 years
2. why did it end? She said she didn't want to be married anymore then started stepping out on me so I would file.
3. how old were you when it happened? 42
4. how long were the 2 of you together? 11 years
5. are you currently dating/married to someone else? No.
6. how long did it take to just move on? Six years later and it might be best to take the rest of this life trip on my own.
ADDED:
7. do you regret it? No, I loved her, she just didn't love me. Stayed in it about 3 years longer then I should have for the step-kids, but they still think of me as Dad and I still am a part of their life. So that makes it worth it to me.
8. did you learn anything valuable? People aren't always the way they seem.
9. do you feel judged because of it (by friends/family/new relationship prospects)? No, all my friends saw what was going on. Well maybe as a fool by some of them for the same reason.
10. do you have kids with the person? They were my step-son and a step-daughter but they still think of me as Dad.0
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