Don't EVER try to be stick thin. Love your curves.
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shovav91
Posts: 2,335 Member
The media and society tells women at every opportunity that in order to be beautiful, they must be sticks. You are told that curves are ugly, and anything above a size zero is straight out fat.
These are LIES.
I struggled with an eating disorder for a lot of my life, and I strongly blame society and what the media thinks a real woman looks like. I was constantly being exposed to these images of this skeletal beings and told, "be this!". Well guess what? No matter how skinny you are, how much makeup you put on, you will NEVER look like them. You know why? Because they are airbrushed and photoshopped to the point of no return, and you are REAL HUMAN BEINGS.
It took me a long time to realize this. I would panic at the sight of food for years of my life out of fear of becoming "fat". My life was full of more stress and anxiety than I would wish on my worst enemy because I feared something that is necessary to live. Whether you're 400 pounds or 100 pounds, look in the mirror right now. Tell yourself that you are beautiful and MEAN IT. If you don't learn to love yourself and your body for what it is now, you will never love it. I promise you that.
I went through another battle with my eating disorder several months ago, and am still recovering. I am 5'9" and 110 pounds. Because of this, my circulation problems have increased and I am constantly cold to the point where I almost go into shock (I have a disease called Raynauds), and I don't seem to have a lot of energy. I know I need to be gaining weight, but in the back of my mind there is always the fear of becoming "fat". I know I can't only blame society for this and that I have to take some ownership for my actions, but I want to attempt to make a point out of this rant...
**Don't let others define what beauty is. Make this journey because YOU want to, not because there are people telling you that it is the right thing to do. Love yourself- love your body, and don't give a single person the power to make you feel bad about yourself. You are given one body and it is yours to do what you want with it. Treat it well, because this is your only chance. With that said; yes, losing weight to be a more healthy person is absolutely wonderful. However, if you are already thin and trying to lose weight ask yourself why. If you don't love yourself as you are now, a few pounds isn't going to change that. In fact, nothing will. Change your attitude, not your body.
These are LIES.
I struggled with an eating disorder for a lot of my life, and I strongly blame society and what the media thinks a real woman looks like. I was constantly being exposed to these images of this skeletal beings and told, "be this!". Well guess what? No matter how skinny you are, how much makeup you put on, you will NEVER look like them. You know why? Because they are airbrushed and photoshopped to the point of no return, and you are REAL HUMAN BEINGS.
It took me a long time to realize this. I would panic at the sight of food for years of my life out of fear of becoming "fat". My life was full of more stress and anxiety than I would wish on my worst enemy because I feared something that is necessary to live. Whether you're 400 pounds or 100 pounds, look in the mirror right now. Tell yourself that you are beautiful and MEAN IT. If you don't learn to love yourself and your body for what it is now, you will never love it. I promise you that.
I went through another battle with my eating disorder several months ago, and am still recovering. I am 5'9" and 110 pounds. Because of this, my circulation problems have increased and I am constantly cold to the point where I almost go into shock (I have a disease called Raynauds), and I don't seem to have a lot of energy. I know I need to be gaining weight, but in the back of my mind there is always the fear of becoming "fat". I know I can't only blame society for this and that I have to take some ownership for my actions, but I want to attempt to make a point out of this rant...
**Don't let others define what beauty is. Make this journey because YOU want to, not because there are people telling you that it is the right thing to do. Love yourself- love your body, and don't give a single person the power to make you feel bad about yourself. You are given one body and it is yours to do what you want with it. Treat it well, because this is your only chance. With that said; yes, losing weight to be a more healthy person is absolutely wonderful. However, if you are already thin and trying to lose weight ask yourself why. If you don't love yourself as you are now, a few pounds isn't going to change that. In fact, nothing will. Change your attitude, not your body.
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Replies
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very well put
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very well put indeed0
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Well said. Good luck on your journey, and congrats on your revelations.0
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nicely written.0
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amazingly said. I feel very strongly about this because i have watched friends and girls strive to be stick thin to feel pretty... So glad you shared with us0
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I seriously LOVE this...thank you SO much!!!
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I've been thinking about this a lot lately, but you put it better than I ever could, thanks!0
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Very well written post and as a man I would like to say that most men that I know (myself included) do in fact like curves on a woman. Most men do NOT like stick figure women. I agree with you that the media tries to create absurd images of what beauty looks like...0
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Thank you all for your words of support! I just hoped to prevent this negative thought process in some fellow MFPs.0
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Change your attitude, not your body.
Love this!
Because that's the first, biggest step to any positive change. It's not the number on the scale, the size on the clothes... it's what's between your ears.
If someone feels that the way they eat or exercise is punishment for being "fat," I can pretty much guarantee they're going to fail. If they're eating well and exercising because they love themselves and want to treat their body right... there's no way they can fail!
Love yourself. Be happy. Now. You're here because you're either doing the right things for yourself, or learning how to do them for yourself. That's a reason to celebrate!0 -
Change your attitude, not your body.
Love this!
Because that's the first, biggest step to any positive change. It's not the number on the scale, the size on the clothes... it's what's between your ears.
If someone feels that the way they eat or exercise is punishment for being "fat," I can pretty much guarantee they're going to fail. If they're eating well and exercising because they love themselves and want to treat their body right... there's no way they can fail!
Love yourself. Be happy. Now. You're here because you're either doing the right things for yourself, or learning how to do them for yourself. That's a reason to celebrate!
Yes yes yes!
Well put dear
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Very well written post and as a man I would like to say that most men that I know (myself included) do in fact like curves on a woman. Most men do NOT like stick figure women. I agree with you that the media tries to create absurd images of what beauty looks like...
I'm curious as to what other men have to say on the subject. To each their own, I know 0 -
This is a great post and something I am also trying to remember. I say to myself that food is fuel, I am eating healthy, I make healthy choices (not.. I'm fat, I need to diet, I'm ugly etc -- told that by many over the years so I am trying to replace old bad info with new positive info).
When I started MFP I wanted to eat healthy, be healthy, be a good example to my kids to think about what we eat so (in my beliefs) treat my body well, God gave me this life in this body and I want to be a good steward of what he has given me and treat it right.
I have always been careful with sweets with my kids. My son has gained some weight recently -- because I have been a little lax keeping track of what he's eating... a sweet cereal for breakfast, sweetened yogurt with lunch, then he wants pop or juice and desert at night.. ,. it is adding up.
I don't make comments, just told him today to think about his choices and as his mom I want him to make healthier ones.. like water instead of pop. And I tell him why things aren't so great for our bodies. Not just 'oh it will make you fat' we don't use that word at home and I don't allow them to comment about what a person looks like because we are all created differently.
Sorry, ranting here.... thank you again for this post and reminder. May we all have a healthy body image and love ourselves, and want to eat healthier and be healthier so we feel good regardless of our shape or size or weight. thanks for letting me share
Kelle0 -
That was not a rant at all... I loved every word of it.
I am so thrilled that you banned the word "fat" at your house. Honestly, there is no reason for it. Make healthy choices, but don't think of food as bad or evil. Too many people make this mistake and begin to fear food itself rather than just staying away from things that do more harm to your body than good.0 -
Great post!!!
I am curvy as well and my goal isn't to get stick thin ... even if that's what the media tells me to do!
I don't want to get much smaller ... I just want to get healthier ... and I want to feel better! Be in better shape. I'm sure that, by doing that, I will lose some weight. Although some people look great at 120 lbs, that is not where I want to be. I love my curves and I will not give them up completely! :P0 -
Absolutely the best post so far! It is so true and I applaud you for trying to overcome your disorder, good luck with all you set your mind to, because you CAN achieve it! Thanks for the words in this post, definitely something I needed to hear
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My cousin sent this awhile ago...
A while back, at the entrance of a gym, there was a picture of a very thin and beautiful woman. The caption was "This summer, do you want to be a mermaid or a whale?"
The story goes, a woman (of clothing size unknown) answered the following way:
"Dear people, whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, seals, curious humans), they are sexually active and raise their children with great tenderness.
They entertain like crazy with dolphins and eat lots of prawns. They swim all day and travel to fantastic places like Patagonia, the Barents Sea or the coral reefs of Polynesia.
They sing incredibly well and sometimes even are on cds. They are impressive and dearly loved animals, which everyone defend and admires.
Mermaids do not exist.
But if they existed, they would line up to see a psychologist because of a problem of split personality: woman or fish?
They would have no sex life and could not bear children.
Yes, they would be lovely, but lonely and sad.
And, who wants a girl that smells like fish by his side?
Without a doubt, I'd rather be a whale.
At a time when the media tells us that only thin is beautiful, I prefer to eat ice cream with my kids, to have dinner with my husband, to eat and drink and have fun with my friends.
I don't want to be a whale but I do love my curves!
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Great post!!!
I am curvy as well and my goal isn't to get stick thin ... even if that's what the media tells me to do!
I don't want to get much smaller ... I just want to get healthier ... and I want to feel better! Be in better shape. I'm sure that, by doing that, I will lose some weight. Although some people look great at 120 lbs, that is not where I want to be. I love my curves and I will not give them up completely! :P
I'm so glad you're happy with your body and doing this for healthy reasons. You don't have a picture, but I'm sure you're BEAUTIFUL! 0 -
Absolutely the best post so far! It is so true and I applaud you for trying to overcome your disorder, good luck with all you set your mind to, because you CAN achieve it! Thanks for the words in this post, definitely something I needed to hear
I'm so glad you liked it... take the lesson with you through life. It's a hard one to learn, but everything is a million times easier once you do.0 -
My cousin sent this awhile ago...
A while back, at the entrance of a gym, there was a picture of a very thin and beautiful woman. The caption was "This summer, do you want to be a mermaid or a whale?"
The story goes, a woman (of clothing size unknown) answered the following way:
"Dear people, whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, seals, curious humans), they are sexually active and raise their children with great tenderness.
They entertain like crazy with dolphins and eat lots of prawns. They swim all day and travel to fantastic places like Patagonia, the Barents Sea or the coral reefs of Polynesia.
They sing incredibly well and sometimes even are on cds. They are impressive and dearly loved animals, which everyone defend and admires.
Mermaids do not exist.
But if they existed, they would line up to see a psychologist because of a problem of split personality: woman or fish?
They would have no sex life and could not bear children.
Yes, they would be lovely, but lonely and sad.
And, who wants a girl that smells like fish by his side?
Without a doubt, I'd rather be a whale.
At a time when the media tells us that only thin is beautiful, I prefer to eat ice cream with my kids, to have dinner with my husband, to eat and drink and have fun with my friends.
I don't want to be a whale but I do love my curves!
That sign is sickening. I would have put in a complaint- nobody should ever be subjected to that.
I just laughed out loud at your response though, what a wonderful attitude!0
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