You only know me as fat

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melbhall
melbhall Posts: 519
in Motivation and Support
I am overly depressed today and I'm psyching myself out. Monday I was so excited to take my 2 boys trick or treating. I didn't have a costume so I put on a "cute" outfit, with a fun new scarf, straightened my hair and slapped on some lipstick. I felt pretty, and my husband said I was glowing! Tuesday, however my world crumbled, a sweet friend posted pics of me on Facebook with my boys and husband. Her caption was best. family. photo. ever. I was humiliated because all I could focus on was how fat I looked. Then I realized she only knows me as fat Melissa, and she accepts me for who I am. I need to "lighten up" literally and figuratively. I couldn't even enjoy an afternoon of shopping because I am in such a funk!

How do I pull myself out of this and get back on track? Any words of encouragement are appreciated. Do any of you all have mantras that help you feel better about yourself?

Replies

  • Larius
    Larius Posts: 507 Member
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    We are our own worst critics.
  • Christine1110
    Christine1110 Posts: 1,786 Member
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    One step at a time...go for a walk...or exercise. Watch what you eat.

    Once I'm off junk food I am fine....but it is hard to leave it alone in the beginning.
  • mark03264
    mark03264 Posts: 334 Member
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    As Larius said, we are our own worse critic. I was looking at your pictures. You may not be where you want to be but you look great! Don't be so hard on yourself.
  • moonfleur75
    moonfleur75 Posts: 19
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    I totally understand where you are at. It does pass and you are doing the right thing by reaching out for help! Tell yourself you are beautiful and loved every day. I'm sure your family loves you unconditionally (and your friend does too!) Just remember how cute you felt when you dressed up! Revisit that feeling.
  • bmw4deb
    bmw4deb Posts: 1,325 Member
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    Keep going, you will get there and believe it or not you will be glad you have that
    picture to look back on and compare :) I have the same feelings at times Today
    I realized im still a little short fat girl :noway: but i have come along way and so have you
    we can and will do this! just keeping pushing play !
  • pixiesx3
    pixiesx3 Posts: 172 Member
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    Yeah, I get it. I got tired of looking at pictures of myself with my kids with me trying to hide behind all 3 of them! All of my current friends have only known me around the size I am now. When I look at these pictures and the ones I am taking of my journey, I don't always like what I see. However, I tell myself that I am making a positive change now. I can do it. I don't want to look like this forever but... more importantly... I WANT to be able to go play outside with my kids. I WANT to be able to see them graduate HS, College, get married, have kids (that I can spoil). I WANT my girls to have positive self images no matter what they look like! I want them to want healthy lifestyles and habits, though. So I AM making this change. I AM making healthier food choices, life choices, fitness choices.

    Look forward. Don't get stuck in the negative. :flowerforyou: :heart: :happy:
  • melbhall
    melbhall Posts: 519
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    Thanks. I just started feeling like my perception of myself was wrong, like I should be more ashamed of myself. I'm normally an upbeat, funny, happy girl, but in think maybe I've hit rock bottom, at least I hope so, then I will have nowhere to go but up. I've gotten too comfortable being uncomfortable. Thanks for the kind words. I am thankful for my loving family and friends, and that despite how I look I am fairly healthy...I just need to channel some positive energy and fake it until I make it!
  • kgrnmom
    kgrnmom Posts: 4
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    Listen if you looked at the pic and realized that others may see you differently then your own mind...so what. Your confidence shouldn't come from the approval of others. Remember how the night started out ...you dressed up and felt good. you enjoyed the night trick or treating with your kids! How you look didn't change overnight...maybe you have some more work to do and maybe you thought you were doing better. But on that night you were great and you shined. Don't let that confidence fade away...you need it to move forward. We are all skinner in our own mind and pictures tell a hard truth but we are still great on the inside and working towards being great on the outside. Try and belive in yourself because quitting gets you no where. Good Luck!
  • melbhall
    melbhall Posts: 519
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    As Larius said, we are our own worse critic. I was looking at your pictures. You may not be where you want to be but you look great! Don't be so hard on yourself.

    Thank you, but don't be fooled by my pics, they are my "thin" pics because I thought seeing myself that way would motivate me!
  • melbhall
    melbhall Posts: 519
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    Listen if you looked at the pic and realized that others may see you differently then your own mind...so what. Your confidence shouldn't come from the approval of others. Remember how the night started out ...you dressed up and felt good. you enjoyed the night trick or treating with your kids! How you look didn't change overnight...maybe you have some more work to do and maybe you thought you were doing better. But on that night you were great and you shined. Don't let that confidence fade away...you need it to move forward. We are all skinner in our own mind and pictures tell a hard truth but we are still great on the inside and working towards being great on the outside. Try and belive in yourself because quitting gets you no where. Good Luck!

    So true. Nothing changed that night. And you're right, clearly my view of myself was skewed and that is why inhavent committed to making this change. Maybe those pics were a blessing, either way, they arena captured shot of my first ever trick or treat with my boys and I shouldn't be so selfish and ruin that memory.
  • alina726
    alina726 Posts: 30 Member
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    Girl, I feel the same way. I have really struggled this week. I've been on my "I'm THE fat girlfriend" kick again this week. If Brian heard me say that he would kill me. I'm so tired of it and don't know why I refuse to do the right thing. I was good yesterday, then ruined it again last night. I'm angry with myself one day, feel sorry for myself the next, then motivated, then back to angry...and the cycle continues. I mean seriously I want to lose 25 pounds, not 125. So why can't I do it? Love you girl! You're gorgeous, a wonderful mother and wife! You'll get this!

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