On body image: some of us are barbarians, some elves.

(I wrote this as self motivation, but am posting it here to help others as well! I cross posted this on my personal blog at awesomeville.co.uk)

I was reading an article not too long ago on female bodies in Hollywood. It went on to describe a particular actress, small of stature and perfectly petite, as "elfin." I was taken aback at the choice of adjective, so much so I stopped reading to reflect. The word "elfin" conjures up a number of mental images that throwback to my early days of online gaming with Everquest: elves were short, slender, and beautiful in their perfectly pocket-sized proportions. I suppose then the word fit quite well with today's Hollywood femme fatales who, by need of the industry, are slender and beautiful, but always seem to be a bit on the shorter side as well. Then I got to thinking: if these women are to be likened to elves, what am I then, in using the same fantasy analogy?

Well, I guess that makes me a barbarian.

Within the last year I've spent a great deal of time reflecting on body image, as that needed just as much of my time and energy as losing weight and getting fit: physical fitness is only an illusion without the mental wellbeing of having a healthy body image to back it up. It's taken a long while (hell, I'm 26 years old... so 26 years?) to start developing a healthy image of my own body, and it started with the separation of what I could and could not change.

When I began, I knew I could change my weight, my body fat percentage, my level of physical fitness, my muscle strength and, most importantly, my mental outlook. What I wasn't going to be able to change, regardless of how hard I worked, was my five foot ten stature, my wide set hips and shoulders, and my general "size" as being bigger than most of my female peers. I could lose all the weight I wanted, but I was never going to be a "shorty" or "pocket-sized" or even "elfin."

It's only been recently I've begun to change, and not change the metrics in which I have to operate, but change how I feel about them. My goal weight is a number many women would cringe to see on a scale, my current weight even moreso. My wide hips and long legs mean I will more than likely never own a pair of jeans with a single digit size, and my t-shirts will forever be large, very occasionally medium, never small and certainly not extra-small. I will always be taller, broader, and overall "bigger" than most women... not all, but a good portion. And I am okay with it. No matter one's overall frame, physical fitness and a good looking body can be obtained, and the only measurement I need is how I feel when I look in the mirror; not a number on a scale that will always be a little on the higher side, nor the double digit number printed on the tag in my pants.

Besides, barbarians are pretty badass, and hey.... at least I'm not an ogre! ^_^