Toddler and dentist help?

mleoni092708
mleoni092708 Posts: 629 Member
edited October 4 in Chit-Chat
My mom and I are taking my 3 year old daughter to get 2 cavities filled in her baby teeth today at 5. My nerves are a little shot over it. I'm scared they will cause her pain and she'll meltdown.

I personally have serious issues with the dentist and take enough tranquilizers to put down a rhino when I go in to get cavities filled. That's why my mom is going just in case i get a case of the woozies and fall over. My poor baby doesn't need mom freaking her out! I may stay in the waiting room unless she really wants me in there with her. I can't help it, I have anxiety and panic attacks. Just makes me feel like a terrible mother when I can't be there a 100% for my child when she needs me.

Anyone have experience with kids and cavities or some advice?

Replies

  • vim_n_vigor
    vim_n_vigor Posts: 4,089 Member
    My three year old just had fillings and he had fun. It was no issue for him at all. They gave him some gas and that was it. They showed him everything before they used it and went nice and slow for him.
  • vettle
    vettle Posts: 621 Member
    Really the best thing you can do is stay away from her if you are that anxious. You will only pass your fears on to her and you don't want that. Go in there with a smile and keep those nerves away from her! I am a nervous wreck at the dentist too.

    Dentists are great with children so if you show that you are relaxed and you trust them then your child will see that it is OK and will be fine.
  • shakemybooty
    shakemybooty Posts: 681 Member
    Hope it goes well for you. My kids dentist doesn't even let the parents go back with them and they've all done fine.
  • MyChance2011
    MyChance2011 Posts: 26 Member
    My four yr old has had cavities the past two years. I request the versid (not sure how to spell it). It kind makes them loopy, we call it happy juice. It can make them go to sleep although he didn't the last time. He does so good with them with this. He's not scared and isn't crying from pain. I don't get to go back with them when they use this, but that's ok, because I hate seeing my children in pain (even if they don't know they are in pain). They monitor his breathing and heartrate during the procedure because there is a risk of low oxygen and elevated heartrate. Luckily, he does really well with it. I wish you much success during the procedure, I am not brave enough to just use laughing gas.
  • jeeping_mom
    jeeping_mom Posts: 72
    I was just as worried (and hate the dentist) when my 4-year-old (now 5 1/2) had to get a cavity filled. They didn't let me in the room and I was pretty distraught over that, but figured it might be a good thing.

    She did great. She never cried, she never freaked out - I was up worried for 2 days before for nothing. Hopefully your daughter will be a trooper and please don't think you're a bad mom. Just be there to give big hugs and kisses before and after <3
  • pandsmomCheryl
    pandsmomCheryl Posts: 168 Member
    I so wish you lived in Massachusetts so I could send you to my guy. I found the Pied Piper of dentists, and thank goodness because my youngest son (now 9) has had multiple cavities & all sorts of work. I was there yesterday as a matter of fact ($521 later - ouch!) I assume it's because he had severe reflux as a baby and vomited 6-8 times a day...the enamel on his baby teeth is just shot. If you don't love who you see today - I would try looking up a pediatric dentist that specializes with special needs kids - maybe your child doesn't have special needs - but if you find a dentist who knows how to work with those kids - he or she will be great with all kids. Also - try not to give off your frightened vibe - our kids look to us to guage how to feel, kwim? And lastly - your daughter will probably do better without you in the room - especially if you don't think you can hide your anxiety - you're still "there" for her - you are taking care of her....lots of people don't even keep up with dental care - you don't need to be in the room with her....good luck!
  • skingszoo
    skingszoo Posts: 412 Member
    My 4yo has had 3. I LOVE his dentist and my LO went back on his own with the nurse. My 3yo has 4 crowns and we had to go to the hospital and be put down for those, She will be fine but dont let her see you being panicked.
  • cueball2
    cueball2 Posts: 1 Member
    To tell you the truth, you are completely normal. I would say that 70% of the parents I see have the same problems when it comes to their children and pain. I am a dentist and I still have the same problem when my children get fillings. We just don't want our kids hurting. Most dentists now have ways of assisting the child to make it a more comfortable visit. Nitrous oxide, sedation, etc. If you think it will be hard then don't go back. Its OK, your not a bad parent. Overall we want the visit to be a good one so the patient isn't afraid of the dentist when they are an adult. =)
  • mleoni092708
    mleoni092708 Posts: 629 Member
    Thank you so much for the replies. I feel much better :smile:

    She's a trooper and always surprises me how resiliant she is. She's the kid that falls down and scrapes her knee and gets up and keeps on running like nothing happened. She takes after her father, thank goodness!
  • alliebee0440
    alliebee0440 Posts: 1 Member
    You sound like a wonderful mother and while I do not have any children of my own I had some difficult experiences as a child in the dental offices due to being born without any enamel.

    I will tell you this, I don't know what your situation is but in this day and time you should be able to find a dentist where the majority of work is pain free. I thought it was impossible til I found my current dentist. She is a fantastic mother who understand not wanting pain during any procedures. She is also a dentist who keeps up with the latest technology that can make procedures as comfortable as possible for the patients. If at anytime in any procedure you raise your hand all hands are out of your mouth and she will try to adjust whatever is that is painful for you. There are dentist like her out there you just have to find them.
  • _beachgirl_
    _beachgirl_ Posts: 3,865 Member
    I was a pediatric dental hygienist for many years. Are you taking her to a pediatric dentist? If not, I definitely would. They know how to deal with children and make them as comfortable as possible.
    Since this is the first time she's having any dental work done, there is no way to know how she will react. As a parent, do your best to make it a fun,exciting experience for her and do not let her know your fears! There are great books just for kids her age you can get at the library to give her an idea of what to expect. Don't use words like needle, or pain!
    The dentist will most likely use nitrous oxide (laughing gas), he/she will use a flavored topical gel to numb the area where she will be injected. Most dentists do something to distract the child as they are injecting them, like wiggling her cheek and talking to her.
    I would recommend that you not go in the room with her. Sometimes children react differently when a parent is there.
    Sometimes the worse part for kids is the numbness they feel afterward. Make sure you let her know that her mouth will feel sleepy afterwards. It may feel itchy too. Watch what she eats, nothing too hot because they won't be able to judge temperature.

    I am positive she will do fine! Please give us an update after the appointment!
  • jamielynn1981
    jamielynn1981 Posts: 232 Member
    I am a dental hygienist and we see this all the time. Most of the time the parents have a harder time with the appt than the kids do. My best advice is to not let her see you upset. Also if she would, let her go back by herself. If you do need to go back, try not to talk to her as much as you can. Sounds crazy but it makes it very difficult for the dentist to talk to them and for the children to understand what is going on.
    A lot of times if we cannot get the work done we will just keep an eye on the cavities(if they are not too bad). Or if the work really needs done he will take them to the hospital under gen anes and get all of the work done. That sounds really scary but it is a cake walk for the kids with no bad experiences.
    Hope everything goes well! Just remember that we do this everyday and are used to how children react :)
  • Melburk
    Melburk Posts: 2
    My step-mom had me take my half-sister when she was 4 and it helped so much, since I love the dentist! If my step-mom went her anxiety would have made it awful for my sister, so yes, stay away!

    My son loves going to the dentist, since his dentist makes him balloon animals by blowing them up with the metal thing that sprays both water and air -- so a water splash and balloon blowing when he first sits down may help -- especially splashing mom in the face:) Good Luck -- your son is fortunate you are incredibly realistic and conscientious of this event!!
  • curvygirl512
    curvygirl512 Posts: 423 Member
    I tried this when my (then) 4 y/o had to get her teeth drilled. First, I had her take a big stuffed animal to hold onto if she got scared. Then I took her favorite story and read it to her with all the funny voices to distract her. Worked like a charm for her. Oh, and when we were done, we went for ice cream. OK, that's a bit of contradiction, I know, but sometimes bribery is what works for 4 y/o's. Even the dentist didn't see a problems with the "promise" I made her. Do what works!
  • mleoni092708
    mleoni092708 Posts: 629 Member
    My step-mom had me take my half-sister when she was 4 and it helped so much, since I love the dentist! If my step-mom went her anxiety would have made it awful for my sister, so yes, stay away!

    My son loves going to the dentist, since his dentist makes him balloon animals by blowing them up with the metal thing that sprays both water and air -- so a water splash and balloon blowing when he first sits down may help -- especially splashing mom in the face:) Good Luck -- your son is fortunate you are incredibly realistic and conscientious of this event!!

    Holy moly! I want to go to your dentist! I want a balloon animal.....:tongue:
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