Anyone left their toddlers for a business trip??? Help!

AJCM
AJCM Posts: 2,169 Member
edited September 18 in Health and Weight Loss
I have to leave my kids for an "optional" business trip in a few months, and am debating about going. My sweethearts have just turned 1 and 3. I work part time from home, so I am never really away from them. This would be 3 or 4 nights... :sick:

I know it's not related to dieting, but there are so many knowledgeable and supportive moms and dads on here, I thought someone might have an opinion or a story to share!

Thanks!
:flowerforyou:

Replies

  • AJCM
    AJCM Posts: 2,169 Member
    I have to leave my kids for an "optional" business trip in a few months, and am debating about going. My sweethearts have just turned 1 and 3. I work part time from home, so I am never really away from them. This would be 3 or 4 nights... :sick:

    I know it's not related to dieting, but there are so many knowledgeable and supportive moms and dads on here, I thought someone might have an opinion or a story to share!

    Thanks!
    :flowerforyou:
  • icandoit
    icandoit Posts: 4,163 Member
    I didn't leave my son until he was 5. He is now 13. I first left my daughter when she was 3.5 months. I left them with family. It was hard, but it was also good. I missed them, but I was also able to relax. I called them 4 times a day. I don't work, so I am with them 24/7.
    It will be ok. It is good for the kids to learn to be with other people, so when you do need to go again, it is much easier. We now take 2 annual motorcycle trips.
    Good luck. No matter what way you go, you did the right thing.
  • AJCM
    AJCM Posts: 2,169 Member
    icandoit... thanks for sharing your story. :flowerforyou:

    I actually volunteer with a charity, so the travel is optional, but it's for a cause I believe in, so I think it's important that I go on the trip.

    I still breastfeed my baby girl (14 mo) so that's why I'm really hesitant about going (in addition to missing both of them!). They would be with my husband/their dad who is amazing with them, and family would help him. The logistics are covered, it's just my emotional stuff to deal with...
    :ohwell:
  • icandoit
    icandoit Posts: 4,163 Member
    I breastfeed my girl too. I pumped day and night until I had 150 oz of milk. I felt like a cow. I also took a pump with me to help with the relief. Pumped in the shower in the morning and in the evening. Take nursing pads. ALOT.
    If this is something you feel you need to do...do it. The kids will be fine and so will you. The separation is good for all.
    I say go for it. It sound like they will be in good hands and they are all just a phone call away. As they get older (3 and 13 here) you sometimes can't wait to go. Sounds bad, but it is nice to have adult time.
  • Assilem
    Assilem Posts: 21
    Getting away can be good for you. Even if it is a business trip, its time away. When you're in another town its great because you can get breaks at home but they're never long. There's always dishes, laundry, etc. When you're in another town there's nothing. Its actually a break. Plus when you get home after a few days away you appreciate your kids soooo much. You come home refreshed almost and less stressed so you end deal with your kids better when they're acting up or not listening. I also think its easier when they're left with hubby or family. Eases the worry.
  • catlover
    catlover Posts: 389
    I could barely put my daughter into daycare at church so I'm not much help. I was hospitalized when my son was 6 months old and he cried the entire week he was with the sitter, couldn't leave him with dad since dad was deployeed. He got better with time, she never had the practice. I'm a preschool teacher and I've seen kids with the whole range of seperation anxiety. What I have discovered is that it's usually easier on the kids than the parents, especially if the kids are in a quality setting with people who love and understand them. I vote, GO....
  • AJCM
    AJCM Posts: 2,169 Member
    Thanks for the encouragement ladies... I think I am going to go! ... and on some level I AM excited about some me time - imagine sleeping in, no laundry, no cooking meals, down time of shopping, sights and and laying on a beach without anyone tugging at me.... ahhhh.....
    :glasses:
  • pam0206
    pam0206 Posts: 700 Member
    Definitely GO! It is hard. You feel guilty for going and you'll feel bad if you don't allow yourself to do it. Either way, you're going to feel bad. That's being a mom. However, having said that, you deserve to feel like a grown up. It's amazing what a few days will do to your attitude and it will help you deal with those little ones when you get back. I have two girls and I don't leave them often for long periods of time, but every once in a blue moon, it's nice to eat dinner AFTER 5:00 and have a bed time later than 8:00. Go and enjoy. You'll be a better mom for it. :flowerforyou:
  • AJCM
    AJCM Posts: 2,169 Member
    Thanks Pam and all... as much as I can't leave them, I am looking forward to it (even the flight is intriguing - read a book, watch a movie, sleep!).
    :love:
  • bigdane321
    bigdane321 Posts: 233 Member
    My wife and I just got back from my birthday weekend in San Fransisco. We left behind our 3 year old and our 11 month old with family of coarse. No matter what my wife and I need our time and short trips are not going to effect your children in a negative way. In fact some studies show that it teaches them to become independent. It also helps socialize them with others. I hope you go.
  • ariannedavis
    ariannedavis Posts: 520 Member
    I'm in totally agreement! GO!

    When my son was 3 months old I had to go back to work. My job requires a LOT of traveling. Single overnights were o.k., the longer trips were harder. Especially since I had to be on the road when he was home for the weekend & not at a sitters. It has gotten easier with time and I can now leave the guilt at home!

    You need to prepare yourself for it. It will be tough; you don't realize how much you become accustomed to your childs' sounds when they sleep. I woke up to the hotel air conditioner wondering why my son sounded like that! :laugh: Plan to call in the morning & at night. Keep the main routine of interaction similar and you'll feel better. My husband would call me when my son got up in the morning so I could talk to him, I would call the sitter's at lunch, and in the afternoon when he got home, and right before bed time. My husband would put me on speaker while he gave a bath, played, etc. You'll just feel like you are there!

    Not only will you miss your kids, but your husband too. It will be great for your whole family! :flowerforyou:
  • AJCM
    AJCM Posts: 2,169 Member
    bigdane... I completely agree, it's good for the kids! I'm the one who is hesitating. GREAT that you guys got away - did you LOVE sleeping in and time alone??? I would LOVE to get away with just the hubby (I feel badly for not even thinking about missing him - although I would - he just had the flu for 3 days this week and I did indeed miss his company!). :tongue:

    ariannedavis... thanks - glad you've been through it, and great ideas about the calls. I had a one year mat leave, and now just a little here and there from home, so I am with them so much. At times I feel I need a break, so I think it will be good for all involved!

    :flowerforyou:
  • mommyskis
    mommyskis Posts: 277 Member
    I went away just for the day, not even overnight, and you can't believe how much more my husband appreciates me!!! It gives them a whole new understanding of how you can be busy all day long and never sit, but accomplish absolutely nothing. I think my husband was even more excited than the kids when I returned, and I consider him a really good dad! The kids will be fine. It actually will be a great time to spend just with daddy. Have a great time!
  • Nich0le
    Nich0le Posts: 2,906 Member
    I used to be a manager at starbucks and our annual conferences were "optional" (of course if you didn't go it wasn't good for your relationship with the higher ups). The first time I had to go was when my youngest was only 1 years old and I thought the same thing but I have to tell you it was nice to get away and be with people in a place where I had no responsibilities. I was shocked, I felt horribly guilty, but it was nice. The next year we had a longer conference and I have to tell you I started looking forward to those trips because I knew that I was going to be able to just take care of me, and sleep soundly for the first time since the previous trip.

    It is good for your kids to know that mommy can leave and things are going to be ok and when she comes home it's even sweeter, not to mention by the 2nd or 3rd day you will want to come home to all that awaits you! It is also healthy for mommy to be able to get away and get a little mommy time and some sleep! It is also healthy for you to realize that your spouse can take care of the kids and house and get a little taste of what your daily life is like, even if it isn't as good as when you do it and it will make your spouse appreciate what you do too!

    Go on the trip, enjoy the tiny break and relish the moment you get home and they rush into your loving arms!
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