How to want it enough

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Fayve
Fayve Posts: 411 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
So I've been on MFP for a little over 220 days now. I've lost about 6 pounds, and my body looks less mushy than it did when I started. My weight fluctuates about 3 pounds from day to day, as many can relate. Needless to say, I'm not as far as I thought I'd be 200 days ago.

This isn't a post asking for advice on how to lose more weight, or tone up quicker, but instead... how to keep wanting "this"?

"This", meaning a size 6 pant, a bikini-body, the endurance to run a 5k, etc. I'm not sure if I'd call myself unmotivated - I just feel like more often than not, it's worth it to eat the extra 30g of cheese and pasta, or have another tbsp of peanut butter versus having the illusion that I might drop .5 pounds in the next week.

I don't feel "fat" - I think that when I did in the past, it was self-esteem rather than my actual weight. I don't have the motivation of "the ability to play with my children" or "trimming down in time for X event". I just feel in purgatory where my weight has remained the same for the last few months. Perhaps it's my diet at fault, or maybe I'm not exercising as much as I should. Regardless, I feel like I don't even want to tackle any of these issues, because the inspiration simply isn't there.

Would love to hear any thoughts, opinions, or advice :)

Replies

  • mkallie
    mkallie Posts: 110 Member
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    I think only you can make yourself want it, and if you're happy where you are, maybe you're fine?

    I have a whiteboard next to my fridge and it says "what do you want more?" so whenever I go snack I have to think about it. I want the 5k. Wait, no, I did the 5k. And I did the 10k. I want the half marathon and I want to go climbing out west in the mountains and I want to be strong and play -- hike and do water sports in summer and snow sports in winter. I guess I like exercising and I'm proud of where I've gotten my body... but I guess for me it isn't, what's the number on the scale, but what can I DO with my body?

    Maybe if you want to stay motivated or you have a feeling that there's something else, you should get out and DO more. Fitness in and of itself is kinda blah.
  • MFPfriend
    MFPfriend Posts: 1,121 Member
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    Bump. This is the same thing for me.
    All the things that I wanted when I started, I have. My main problem was horrible self-esteem issues. I want to be "skinny" so I would be "happy". Then somewhere along the way I became happy with myself. I still have 30 pounds to lose, so I know I need to do it to be healthy, but I can't find the motivation.
  • Holly_Roman_Empire
    Holly_Roman_Empire Posts: 4,440 Member
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    Different things motivate different people. For me, I just have to keep a picture of Eva Mendes around (see my weight loss ticker, hehe) because I want my body to look like hers eventually.
  • SkinnySoph88
    SkinnySoph88 Posts: 14
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    "I think only you can make yourself want it, and if you're happy where you are, maybe you're fine?"
    ^^^
    I totally agree with this. You look good and you seem like you are in a healthy BMI range. There is no reason why you need all of the other stuff, it's just frills. So if you don't want those things you mentioned, why go for them? I think if you are happy and healthy, lean into it and enjoy that happiness! Life is so often wasted by aspiring for all of the things we don't have rather than just being in the moment and being *satisfied*.
  • kjannan
    kjannan Posts: 248 Member
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    Every morning I get up & get changed into my workout gear in front of the mirror. I love how my body has changed & thinking about what it used to look like motivates me to move my butt. I am NEVER going to be overweight again.

    My weight loss attempts used to last less than a week but since I found MFP it's now been 3 months, so I think an addiction to MFP has a lot to do with it too! :smile:
  • sryan8408
    sryan8408 Posts: 244
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    Even though you don't have "x" event. Why don't you make one? Set a date for yourself. Set goals with non-food related rewards. That will make you want it. Next 5 lbs you'll get a new workout outfit. First 14 days of staying within 100 calories of your calorie goal you get to go get a pedicure. Next 10 lbs treat yourself to a spa day. etc
  • jmvh59
    jmvh59 Posts: 97
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    You are still really young. It took me a while to settle down enough to actually get my life to resemble some kind of routine. Now, I'm counting calories, not skipping out on my exercise days, I'm listening to my body and the pounds are falling off. When you can get to that point in your life where the drama subsides or is overshadowed by what you really want, you'll find yourself making great strides towards your goal.
  • val205
    val205 Posts: 50 Member
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    Maybe think about it as a life long goal as wanting to take care of yourself? Set yourself a longer goal to reach and then reward yourself when you stick to it. I'm no expert by any means and I'm not at goal yet, but I've realised there are so many reasons to try and be healthy - after all, it's number one. If you don't have your health, any of the other stuff in your life won't matter at all.. good luck :happy:
  • bstamps12
    bstamps12 Posts: 1,184
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    I can't workout or eat less Hershey's kisses for the sake of looking good in a bikini, especially in winter when bikini season is months away. I had to set the goal of running a 5K, then keep making time goals. It got to where I could make myself put something down because I knew I would have an upset stomach when I ran later. And by "set the goal" I mean I paid the money to enter the race so I was for sure committed to it. I was a size 8-10, 164 lbs and that saying "nothing tastes as good as skinny feels" meant nothing and was not a motivator for me. Now I can say "nothing tastes as good as a sub-30 minute 5K feels." And now I am training for my first half marathon and I tell myself "nothing tastes as good as that half marathon medal around my neck will feel!" I'm now a size 2-4, 135 lbs. I would never have gotten here for the sake of looking good. Maybe fill in that blank with a realistic goal or accomplishment for yourself.
  • nehushtan
    nehushtan Posts: 566 Member
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    You want to want it? To me that means you want it. But to get to where you want you need to want it more than you do.

    You seem to be in the "need to lose the last 10 lbs category". That means it's probably going to be HARD TO LOSE it and it's likely to take a LONG TIME, and you may have to be much MORE CAREFUL on a daily basis that some others. You would need to think about every day and not take those pizza and peanut butter breaks until you get to where you want to be. In the "last 10 lbs" territory, week to week loss is too short a horizon. You probably don't want to think about losing half a pound next week, but losing three pounds over the next two or three months.

    If it's just a pain to keep at it, you may decide you are happy with yourself. The thing that confuses me is you seem to be so committed to the program already. If 200+ days of logging isn't proof of "wanting it enough" I don't know what would be.

    All the best....
  • Fayve
    Fayve Posts: 411 Member
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    These ideas are really helpful. It's comforting to know that so many people can relate, and I agree 100% with inspirational words and phrases doing absolutely nothing for me.

    I think I either need to just focus on maintaining and living my life while setting some sort of fitness goal. Even though I stated otherwise in my first post, maybe that goal would be training for a 5k, or doing more yoga, or something more lifestyle based...

    I'm not sure I'm stressed about the scale anymore. After doing the 30DS and losing less than 2 pounds, I could see a real difference in my shape.

    Thank you guys :)

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