Motivation vs Accountability..what are you looking for?

3GKnight
3GKnight Posts: 203
edited October 5 in Motivation and Support
Motivation: 1. "The reason or reasons one has for acting or behaving in a particular way." 2. "The general desire or willingness of someone to do something."

Accountability: 1. "Responsibility to someone or for some activity."

So what are you looking for? One or the other? Or both?

I imagine motivation is primary reason most of us are here, but when I first joined MFP, I expected people would be looking for accountability as well. Maybe not in the purest sense, but at least some feedback if you're not doing things properly or in the best way. That doesn't seem to be the case. It's been my experience that anything that isn't absolutely positive is unwelcome.

What do you do when you're concerned for a MFP friend? It can be very difficult to show concern without it seeming pushy or nosy. You may also be wrong, for any number of reasons. Maybe the person you're concerned about would take it the wrong way. But is it better us to ignore it? Is it even our place to say something?

Personally, I would appreciate someone telling me if I'm not doing something correctly. I'm new to this whole fitness thing. How else are we supposed to learn?

Replies

  • Thena81
    Thena81 Posts: 1,265 Member
    true but i dont want to be judgie and tell ppl what they should do. what if that's their cheat day and i say something? i may hurt ones feelings. weight is an emotional subject and dont want to discourage anyone.
  • MidwestGirlz
    MidwestGirlz Posts: 78 Member
    No one can motivate you to do anything. We all have to motivate ourselves. I am here for accountability, and the amazing support the MFP community provides!!
  • jagar07
    jagar07 Posts: 266 Member
    I agree! I am absolutely here for the accountability/support! It has been more than once that I received a much needed kick in the pants by a fellow MFP'r. It is everyone here who is helping me stay on track, I would not have kept on if I didn't have someone helping me realize I am just feeling sorry for myself and need to pick myself up and keep going. I feel sorry for those who are too sensitiv to hear the truth, because frankly, isn't that what got us into this mess in the first place?
  • jakejacobsen
    jakejacobsen Posts: 584 Member
    I like accountabilty first motivation second. I hold my friends acountable, if they don't like it they are welcome to delete me. I now have less then 30 friends, that are all great, they have it together, I also delete the bad examples for me after a bit of reraching out to help them ( private message) Not a slap to their pride on their wall. Its the way I do it. I don't want a ton of friends and I don't want empty wtg coments. if my day sucked say something or nothing. I may get slamed for this but lets face it guys are a bit more accepting of a harsh coment and this site seams to be atleast 70% woman. I will call my guy friends out harsher then my girl friends.
  • Just1forMe
    Just1forMe Posts: 624 Member
    I think you have to earn the right to speak up by really knowing what the person's plan is before you comment on it. I also think that most people will ask for input if they really want it. Everyone is on here for different reasons and has a different weight loss plan.
    If someone is not losing at all and asks for my opinion on why and I see that they are eating fast food 5x per week, I will be honest with them. My diary is open to my friends but I chose not to let it post to my wall every day when I have completed it because I don't feel I need input in that area. I also zig zag my calories so someone might think I am "over" when I'm really not. If I see someone that is not really dedicated to getting healthy and hasn't asked for input, I will eventually unfriend them, but I normally won't give unsolicited advice.
  • 3GKnight
    3GKnight Posts: 203
    No one can motivate you to do anything. We all have to motivate ourselves. I am here for accountability, and the amazing support the MFP community provides!!

    Thanks for the reply! Not trying to be argumentative, but are you sure about this? Maybe you got your terms crossed?

    For most of us, motivation comes primarily from external sources, positive or negative. There are probably things in your life that would have never even occurred to you to do if it hadn't been for someone encouraging (i.e. motivating) you to do it.

    Accountability, on the other hand, is entirely from within ourselves, at least as far as it applies to our personal lives. No one is responsible for us besides ourselves. (It's different for work. You're responsibl to your employer for the work you do, therefore accountable for your output.)

    MFP friends posting, "Way to go!" "Keep it up!" on my wall, or browsing the Success Stories thread, is motivation for me to keep going. Me telling a friend, "You sure had a lot of sodium today." is closer to accountability.
  • Iwillbemeagain
    Iwillbemeagain Posts: 163
    I want to succeed so tell me if I can do better....
  • boehle
    boehle Posts: 5,062 Member
    I am here to harass you Mr Knight ; )~
  • 3GKnight
    3GKnight Posts: 203
    Ha! And here I was thinking I was doing it right. :wink:

    Thanks, you gorgeous ladies.
  • VictoriousNicole
    VictoriousNicole Posts: 14 Member
    I am here for accountability. I have the motivation.
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
    I guess accountability, but only to myself. I just like logging my food and exercise. I don't really care what anyone else thinks about it.
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