Mood Disorders such as Bipolar? Depression?

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Hey everyone. I am returning to MFP for the 2nd time in hopes to stay aboard even if things get tough.

At times I feel alone with this never-ending battle of weight. But I know that is far from true. I've tried many different weight loss programs and all ended in failure. Not that the program didn't work, but my mindset is never stable enough to continue and stay with it. I get sick of it and each time I do, it's harder and harder to jump back on the horse. My weight is like a yo-yo... a rollercoaster... a never ending battle. I know some people say, "Just eat right and exercise"... it's not that simple for me. It never has been. I'm an emotional eater with Type 1 Bipolar Disorder. My husband switches to night shift every 6 weeks while loading up on 12-hour shifts and constant overtime. While I stay at home with our two beautiful preschool children that are only 13 months apart in age. As soon as I get a chance, my mind inadvertantly takes me to the kitchen for comfort. In a way, I know I am doing it, though, but I don't stop myself because I think I need that satisfaction. My struggles are like any other woman with a weight battle. Struggling to obtain a desired figure to keep her husband on his toes, but failing and watching as her husband worries as her pant size gets bigger and bigger... again. I just wish this could change for me. I wish I could keep a steady weight without the binging, the dieting, the binging, and more dieting. I just want to be normal. Period.

So that's the part of my life that I keep fighting with. Yes, I keep up with my doctor every 6 months, take my medication as directed, avoid alcohol at all costs, I don't smoke or do drugs, I get bloodwork done when prescribed to (for medication purposes), but the only downfall I have to all of this is my unhealthy relationship with food. I'm, like many others, an emotional eater. My husband and I fight... I go straight to the kitchen, I am stressed out... I go straight to the kitchen. My doctor said it's behavioral... much like an addiction that has to be broken with habit and structure. It won't be easy, but has to be done for my health's sake.

For everyone suffering with similar stories or have suffered from similar stories, I know and feel your struggles. Anyone suffering from Bipolar Disorder, depression, or any other mental illness... I truly know how you feel.

So, if you would like to add me as a friend so we may give eachother mutual support, I would be absolutely thankful. Getting back into gear, positively, is something I'm aiming for. I really want to be mentally happy.... That's honestly my utmost aspiration.

Replies

  • cabaray
    cabaray Posts: 971 Member
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    I am bipolar. It is very hard to get the addiction under control. When I was young, it was drugs and alcohol. I kicked those habits and replaced it with food. My medication is working great, but I still have impulse issues. One way I have coped is to keep low calorie snacks around, that way I can munch like I "need" to without the ill effects.
  • Jorra
    Jorra Posts: 3,338 Member
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    There is a group here specifically for support with mental health issues. You should post your introduction there to get some more specific answers.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/89-mental-health-issues
  • Great tip, cabaray... and honestly, my house does need more of this for my sake. Many things I can share with my kiddos, too! :)
  • Thank you, thank you, thank you, Jorra!! :D
  • jenn_is_trouble
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    My entire immediate family has some sort of mental illness and it scares the living hell out of me that I will "end up like them". I have anxiety and depression but am managing it WAY better than they do. Add me if you would like!

    It's so hard (in my opinion) to manage being mentally healthy and being physically healthy as well! Hang in there!
  • DietingMommy08
    DietingMommy08 Posts: 1,366 Member
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    I suffere from severe depression, anxiety, and BINGE EATING....

    I am completetly and 100% there with you, feel free to add me!
  • j_g4ever
    j_g4ever Posts: 1,925 Member
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    I personally am dealing with depression, social anxiety and OCD. The part that I find the hardest is some of the meds will help you gain weight. I have told my doctors I don't want to gain weight I'm trying to loose it. I think I'm on some meds now that will not make me gain weight which will be nice and I have noticed a difference. Another thing that my doctor has told me is exercise really helps with depression. Feel free to add me for added support if you would like.
  • PlunderBunneh
    PlunderBunneh Posts: 1,705 Member
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    My entire immediate family has some sort of mental illness and it scares the living hell out of me that I will "end up like them". I have anxiety and depression but am managing it WAY better than they do. Add me if you would like!

    It's so hard (in my opinion) to manage being mentally healthy and being physically healthy as well! Hang in there!

    I could have written that about myself. I'm the only one of my two sisters and my mother that is not currently taking at least one medication, or in my mother's case, somewhere between 3 and 5. I've had my dances with prozac, but I am fortunate enough that my anxiety and depression are mild enough to control without medication, most of the time.
    My hardest issue is being around my mother is so incredibly stressful that I eat. Even being in her house makes me crave food. Just one snack to make me feel in control of my emotions, just one cookie to calm myself down, just one more slice of pizza to keep the conversation stalled. Don't get me wrong, I don't blame her, she is a wonderful person, but I have a crap ton of emotional baggage, and she is, unfortunately, a trigger for me.
    I know exactly what you mean about binging, and knowing that you're binging, and wanting to stop but not being able to. It is so hard to see the big picture when you can't even see yourself getting through that moment. I can't stop eating when I'm sinking down, but I can make better choices. I can eat a yogurt, or a piece of fruit, or have a small cup of soda. I can fill a bowl with dry rice chex and snack on that. I keep a bag of M&Ms in a drawer, out of sight, but when I'm feeling overwhelmed emotionally and I find myself in the kitchen, I sneak out a single one and it helps.
    Anyhow, I hope the folks over on the mental health board can help you out too. Welcome, and best of luck :)
  • Thank you everyone! :) You've made my day 1,000 times better!
  • torkmdeg
    torkmdeg Posts: 51 Member
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    I suffer from depression and anxiety disorder. :ohwell: Its pretty crappy to deal with and I accidently created a habit for myself to eat when depressed which is generally about 60% of the time. Trying to kick that habit out.
    Always looking for more support so feel free to add me... :smile:
  • dreamshadows
    dreamshadows Posts: 734 Member
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    I deal with Borderline and Avoidant disorders. Borderline includes Bipolar and depression and about a 100 other mental/mood disorders. It's hell to go through, but good friends and a strong support network will always help.

    Feel free to add me as a friend.
  • time2shine29
    time2shine29 Posts: 104 Member
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    I too struggle in this area.

    I've been tossed from hospital to hospital 3 yrs ago in the Washington dc area. I've had horrible psychiatrists push numerous medicines on me, some that made me sweat through my clothes, others that made me eat nonstop, and others that made me numb to the world. I could write a book on all the shady things I have encountered in the medical system and shady doctors who just get kickbacks from drug reps. It's horrible. But there is HOPE!

    Thank GOD I'm in a better place now. I don't know where I'd be if it weren't for caring people who wouldn't stop fighting for better care for me. I gained 80 lbs in 2 years of lithium, seroquel, abilify, and geodon. I've been off meds for 6 months and during the past year have lost 43 lbs. I still have 40 to go...

    Recently I started having panic attacks and the doc prescribed klonopin. I'm hoping not to use this too much and to stay off medication as much as possible as my husband and I want to get pregnant in the next year.

    It's great to hear everyone's stories on here and know that I am not alone. I currently don't know anyone in my area that struggles in this manner.