when should i tell?

walkwithme1
walkwithme1 Posts: 492 Member
edited October 5 in Success Stories
I have lost 55 pounds and my sister doesn't know. She lives in California is younger and always had a great body and has always been pushy about me getting in shape. She always brags about going to the gym and how great she does. I have kept my mouth shut about my journey.

Should I send her a picture before Christmas so she sees my progress or wait till I lose a little more....biggest problem, my parents are going to see her at Christmas and I don't think they can keep the secret. And should I send a before and after pic or just a "now" pic? HELP!

Replies

  • danapearly
    danapearly Posts: 17 Member
    Your sister is going to be sooo very proud of you!!! I think you should send her a before and after picture. She is going to freak!! Do it right before your parents get there!!
  • sc1572
    sc1572 Posts: 2,309 Member
    Send her a holiday card with a picture of the new you! :)
  • ALLNEW42
    ALLNEW42 Posts: 28
    This journey is about you....not your sister. It should not matter who/how someone tells her...just that you know you are doing your best for yourself.
  • Naomi_84
    Naomi_84 Posts: 197 Member
    I think you should ask your Mum and Dad to please keep quiet and to respect your wishes and suprise her when you see her at Christmas. You deserve to see the shock on her face. Just tell your Mum and Dad how hard you've worked and how much it means to you to be able to tell her yourself. I wish I could be a fly on the wall! x
  • AnakiMana
    AnakiMana Posts: 4
    Have you considered inviting her to MFP? That would be one way to inform her.
  • Soccer_chick916
    Soccer_chick916 Posts: 159 Member
    Send her a holiday card with a picture of the new you! :)

    agreed before and after pic!
  • ratherbeskiing
    ratherbeskiing Posts: 847 Member
    I think you should ask your Mum and Dad to please keep quiet and to respect your wishes and suprise her when you see her at Christmas. You deserve to see the shock on her face. Just tell your Mum and Dad how hard you've worked and how much it means to you to be able to tell her yourself. I wish I could be a fly on the wall! x


    ditto
  • italianissima
    italianissima Posts: 140 Member
    I agree- send a card with a pic...
    Maybe you can write something about the new year and the new you! She will be shocked and uberexcited, I'm sure!
  • Daisy374
    Daisy374 Posts: 539 Member
    I agree with sending a before and after pic in a holiday card or as your holiday card. It will definitely shock her and make her super excited to see you! :drinker:
  • italianissima
    italianissima Posts: 140 Member
    Have you considered inviting her to MFP? That would be one way to inform her.

    I thought about saying that too! Great minds think alike!
  • dsjohndrow
    dsjohndrow Posts: 1,820 Member
    It's your victory. I hope that you'll handle it the way that you want to. Let her know when you are ready to. If that includes telling your parents it is important and to keep quiet, then do it. Some times in life you only get what you ask for. :) Congrats BTW.
  • moniquelessard
    moniquelessard Posts: 418
    I think you should ask your Mum and Dad to please keep quiet and to respect your wishes and suprise her when you see her at Christmas. You deserve to see the shock on her face. Just tell your Mum and Dad how hard you've worked and how much it means to you to be able to tell her yourself. I wish I could be a fly on the wall! x

    ^^ this. Although my dad can't keep a secret to save his life, so it's not guaranteed. I also agree with another poster who said that this journey should be about you, not your sister. All that matters is how proud you are of YOURSELF. A lesson I've learnt the hard way. xoxo
  • walkwithme1
    walkwithme1 Posts: 492 Member
    I won't see her till maybe next June! I haven't put anything on facebook and my aunts and cousins haven't said a word! I am kinda excited....
  • Jennieam
    Jennieam Posts: 300 Member
    Next time you chat, mention that you've followed her advice about improving your health/fitness. Don't give details. Don't send photos. Then turn up in person. :devil:
  • Ephena
    Ephena Posts: 610 Member
    Really depends on your relationship with her. If you guys are close go ahead and tell her. If you guys are really competitive you might ask your parents to keep it to themselves so you can surprise her later on when you feel ready.

    I see me family on a regular basis and my closest friends as well. So even though they see the weight coming off the surprise effect really isn't there and I get twisted pleasure out of shocking people. So I've kept my journey off Facebook, where distant friends from around the country and extended family are likely to see something. When I reach my goal weight I have a whole outfit planned to take a picture in and post it for everybody to see.

    I figured this beats having some sort of party with tons of snack food and alcohol.
  • walkwithme1
    walkwithme1 Posts: 492 Member
    I think you should ask your Mum and Dad to please keep quiet and to respect your wishes and suprise her when you see her at Christmas. You deserve to see the shock on her face. Just tell your Mum and Dad how hard you've worked and how much it means to you to be able to tell her yourself. I wish I could be a fly on the wall! x

    ^^ this. Although my dad can't keep a secret to save his life, so it's not guaranteed. I also agree with another poster who said that this journey should be about you, not your sister. All that matters is how proud you are of YOURSELF. A lesson I've learnt the hard way. xoxo


    Oh, no this is TOTALLY about me! For once in my life it is ME!
  • walkwithme1
    walkwithme1 Posts: 492 Member
    Really depends on your relationship with her. If you guys are close go ahead and tell her. If you guys are really competitive you might ask your parents to keep it to themselves so you can surprise her later on when you feel ready.

    I see me family on a regular basis and my closest friends as well. So even though they see the weight coming off the surprise effect really isn't there and I get twisted pleasure out of shocking people. So I've kept my journey off Facebook, where distant friends from around the country and extended family are likely to see something. When I reach my goal weight I have a whole outfit planned to take a picture in and post it for everybody to see.

    I figured this beats having some sort of party with tons of snack food and alcohol.

    I have also thought about putting before and after on FB...
  • foraMEthatiLOVE
    foraMEthatiLOVE Posts: 63
    If your sister's been trying to get you interested in losing weight is bcs she probably would like to see you succeed with your struggle, but it seems to me that maybe you might not like her attitude about how she's going about this. When it comes to family, I am a big supportive of going about things with a tone of love and peace, even when I don't receive the same treatment back, after all, they will be a part of our lives forever, I hope you are not doing it to prove her anything.
    If you want her to know about your loss then I think you can e-mail her a pic of you and add an interesting title on the subject line, something like "You will be so proud of me", that way it may show her in a loving way that you care about what she thinks. Maybe you can even tell her that your journey is just beginning, so that she knows you have intentions to lose more. I would not send a before pic, always after pics. :wink:

    Much luck on your journey! :flowerforyou:
  • DBRobinson13
    DBRobinson13 Posts: 40 Member
    Make a personal Christmas card incorporating your before and after! Have fun with it! And congratulations!!! Keep it up! Here's a quick start:

    "Twas months before Christmas, and all through the house
    No one was stirring, not even a mouse.
    The footsteps were heavy, sluggish and slow
    And I said to myself, "This weight's got to go".

    With me in my sweatpants, overwhelmed with where to start
    It was off to the gym, to find the target rate for my heart.
    The treadmill, the eliptical, and so many other scary things
    Big weights, kettle balls, and weights attached to strings.

    With determination and drive I started out slow,
    To do this right, change my lifestyle, and reach the goal.
    More veggies, and water and meat that was lean
    And before I knew it, I was down 3 sizes in my jeans.

    ....

    Congratulations!
  • dmpizza
    dmpizza Posts: 3,321 Member
    You should be proud of yourself, but let her know before, this way the holidays are about more than just your waistline.
  • Mallory0418
    Mallory0418 Posts: 723 Member
    I think you should ask your Mum and Dad to please keep quiet and to respect your wishes and suprise her when you see her at Christmas. You deserve to see the shock on her face. Just tell your Mum and Dad how hard you've worked and how much it means to you to be able to tell her yourself. I wish I could be a fly on the wall! x

    ^^ This! Her face will be priceless when she sees you!
  • jaabee11
    jaabee11 Posts: 322 Member
    Congrats, You deserve to see your sisters face personally when it's revealed. Can't you fit in a quick trip to see here before you're parents? Isn't there some way you could surprise her. Maybe your parents could help you do it. Or go with them.

    If not ,email the photos while your on the phone with her so you can hear her reaction at least if not see it.
    Oh Skype, then you can see her face, .We do it all the time with our grandkids so we can see them open gifts we have posted to them. It's wonderful seeing their faces. You deserve to see hers.
  • xxsandosx
    xxsandosx Posts: 2
    I think you should reveal your big weight loss when you're ready. You worked hard to get where you are and it needs to be on your terms. Even if your parents spill the beans, is your sister going to believe them? Mine sure wouldn't. Make sure mom deletes any recent pictures she may have of you off her phone before she goes for the holidays. Once you get to the point you want to share your news, maybe treat yourself to a tip out to visit your sister, send her a card with before and after picture, or Skype her and have her see you show off! No matter what, congratulations!
  • iTim__
    iTim__ Posts: 6,823 Member
    I had a similar situation. But, when my family members saw me, they were still shocked by the difference. Just because your parents say you've lost weight and made a big change... it doesn't make the same impact as when your sister sees you and her jaw drops in awe of your progress.

    You look super hot btw in your new profile photo.
  • bambier
    bambier Posts: 32
    I think you should ask your Mum and Dad to please keep quiet and to respect your wishes and suprise her when you see her at Christmas. You deserve to see the shock on her face. Just tell your Mum and Dad how hard you've worked and how much it means to you to be able to tell her yourself. I wish I could be a fly on the wall! x

    I say this as well!

    Reality is even if your mom and dad can't keep quiet in the end, make sure they don't take any photos of you with them. Then save the actual visuals for in person rather than sending her photos -- it'll be worth it to see her reaction!
  • walkwithme1
    walkwithme1 Posts: 492 Member
    I had a similar situation. But, when my family members saw me, they were still shocked by the difference. Just because your parents say you've lost weight and made a big change... it doesn't make the same impact as when your sister sees you and her jaw drops in awe of your progress.

    You look super hot btw in your new profile photo.

    Lol thanks...not used to the term "hot" yet!
  • sjadams01
    sjadams01 Posts: 58
    This journey is about you....not your sister. It should not matter who/how someone tells her...just that you know you are doing your best for yourself.

    Totally agree with this. It's not about her it's about you and the positive changes you are making FOR YOU.
  • fiberartist219
    fiberartist219 Posts: 1,865 Member
    Perhaps you can send her a pic from your phone.
  • tdaddybarlow
    tdaddybarlow Posts: 673 Member
    Send her a holiday card with a picture of the new you! :)

    This is an excellent idea!!! Merry Christmas to you!!!! And egg on her face!
  • MyPromise
    MyPromise Posts: 12
    She's your sister so send a picture of you now. She will be very proud of your success. Remember you are sisters but two completely different people so don't worry so much about how you think she will react, just share your New Improved You with her, you'll be glad you did. You have done the work and should bask in the rewards. Good Job.
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