Turning My Life Around

My journey began with a single step…..I have always been active my whole life, exercise has never been a problem for me; it’s the food, always the food! I am a diagnosed food addict and sufferer of depression and OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) I have yoyo dieted since I was 15 years old and I have had a range of eating disorders from borderline anorexia; bulimia and most recently binge eating.

At my heaviest I weighed 73kilos (160lbs) I am only 5foot 1 so very short – I don’t know exactly how much I weigh, I actually threw the scales out about 2 months ago, because they fluctuate so much I would get down and self sabotage with food, my last weigh in was 2months ago I was at 55.5kilos (121lbs), I am not ruled by the scale anymore and it feels great! The inches lost and clothes falling off me tell the real story.

I joined MFP in February 2011, I was calorie counting and exercising but the weekends would let me down where I would overeat, I decided in May 2011 to set myself a 12 week challenge, no alcohol or processed food for 3 months (all clean eating) I lost 5kilos in 3 months which isn’t a lot for that amount of time but my body literally refuses to lose weight easily, I think it’s from all the sabotaging it’s had! I was really proud of my efforts and it was just what I needed to kick start me into action, eating clean was life changing, my head was clear, no heartburn or indigestion, lots of energy and no bingeing.

Once the challenge ended I was pretty good but slowly some old habits were reappearing, I made the decision to give up alcohol completely 3 weeks ago, I had been thinking about it for a while but never wanted to because I love a glass of wine!! BUT it was having a negative affect on me mentally and stopping me from progressing further, with the wine would come cheese and crackers and anything else I wanted, as soon as I made this decision it was like a weight was lifted off my shoulders.

I’m not where I want to be yet; putting these photos out there totally scares me to death! I despise my before pics, I don’t even really know who that person is anymore, I was sad, depressed and miserable and didn’t know how to change that, I am not 100% happy with my results but my goal was to wear a bikini on our xmas holiday and I have achieved that goal.

This journey has taken me 15months, without the support of my husband, close friends and MFP’s I would never have made it this far of that I have NO doubt, the people I have met on here and become friends with all over the world has touched me in so many ways, I am so incredibly lucky to have such an amazing group of people surrounding me every day.

I have worked so SO hard to get to this point, 5am workouts EVERY day including all through winter, giving up the foods I love (all food!) giving up alcohol, giving up my nights doing Spin classes sometimes, lifting weights, I am in week 8 of INSANITY…this has been a HUGE challenge for me!!! It has literally pushed me to my absolute limits and I LOVE it!! My next ultimate goal is to be in the best shape of my life when I turn 40 in February.

There has been blood, sweat and tears…(tears only once, yes Shaun T broke me one morning!) BUT after 30seconds I got up and kept moving…..my husbands motto to me was “NEVER GIVE UP” no matter what….i have fallen down more times than I care to imagine, mentally I have been challenged and continue to be…but it’s the falling down that makes us stronger and teaches us life’s lessons…I am planning to write a book in the winter about my experiences in mental illness and eating disorders, if I can help just one person out there who may be going through the same issues then I will be extremely happy….xxx

Now I'm not great with computers! and these pics may not show up?? if not you can see my pics under my profile...:o)