Diagnoses and Depression

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katatak1
katatak1 Posts: 261 Member
in Motivation and Support
I'm in need of some serious motivation. The past two weeks have been hell for me and I just don't care enough to eat right or exercise. I don't even have any good food in my house so I'm cooking all the crap I have just sitting around- like a box of graham crackers.

I have two life-long degenerative diseases, one of which I was just diagnosed with, the other I've had for about 5 years. I have hidradenitis suppurativa (HS) and I just got diagnosed with poly-cystic ovary syndrome (PCOS). The HS is a skin disease which causes open sores (abscesses) on the apocrine gland regions (armpit, breasts and groin) and when the act up it's hard to walk and hard to exercise. Ultimately, I will need to get regular skin grafts to deal with the disease.

The PCOS means I'm insulin-resistant and that makes it even harder for me to lose weight because my body doesn't use insulin properly. Ultimately I will have to eat like a diabetic even though I don't have diabetes and I will probably be sub or infertile my entire life and probably never have kids.

This has all got me very depressed and I just don't know what to do to get myself back in to working out and eating better. I feel like Sysyphus. What's the point of rolling the stone up the hill if it's just going to crush me again?

Anyone else dealt with multiple diagnoses have any words of insight or recommendations?

Replies

  • katatak1
    katatak1 Posts: 261 Member
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    I feel pretty bummed that not a single person replied...
  • samba_sue
    samba_sue Posts: 12
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    i was just flicking throughout the boards ,i don't usually take part -but your post is so sad .I can't say that i understand or that it will get better because i just don't know from experience of about the diagnoses .i do know a bit about depression though and its well documented now the l ink between exercise ,diet and managing depression .Just having a structure to cling to and help you stop thinking about what may not happen will help you get up each day and feel that you have got something done .The alternative is ? i guess just sitting and feeling worse each day and getting more unfit and eating food that makes you feel bad d.
    I don't know if this is any help ,but the other thing is that things do pass or if not get better the feelings around them change .Your alive and young and life is around you .best wishes ,you look very pretty in your photo ,and you have youth on your side .Cheers
  • Play_outside
    Play_outside Posts: 528 Member
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    Hi-do you know of the PCOS forums and such? Are you seeing an endocrinologist? Do you have a support network in real life? What do you really enjoy doing that gets you out?

    I know nothing about your first diagnosis so I can't offer anything there. However, a few years ago my doctor thought I had PCOS (turns out I do not, and they have no idea what's wrong with me). I did tons and tons of reasearch while waiting for confirmation though. Are you being treated for your PCOS (like with metformin)? And "ultimately" should be eating a diabetic diet, is actually, yes you should be eating one right now (and really, we all should be eating that way because it is healthful). Get a referral to a dietician to help with proper eating. Look up low glycemic index foods. Eat regularly and balanced.

    This isn't the forum that I had joined at the time, but at a quick glance it looks informative. http://www.soulcysters.com/

    Also, not to minimize at all (totally not the intention), but PCOS is not degenerative although related things can have a degenerative effect. Try to use managing your PCOS as motivation-being healthy and fit can diminish some of the symptoms/effects of PCOS.

    I think too if you feel like there is no hope, no one else is able to offer you hope. But if you set some goals for your future, small ones sooner and bigger ones later, then that can help provide motivation. It would probably also help you to find some people who have the same diagnoses (even if you can't find someone else who has them concurrently) and who are doing generally well in their lives, so you have someone to lean on who understands.
  • ajfrench
    ajfrench Posts: 323 Member
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    I'm sorry to read about your diagnoses. That would get anyone upset. I don't have any advice for you but do offer support. The medical condition I was diagnosed with makes it terribly hard to lose weight. I was depressed about it for two months (with no weight loss) and decided my new goal would be simply to get in better shape. That's all I can control right now. Perhaps finding something you can control will make you feel better -- as hard as that sounds.
  • sophjakesmom
    sophjakesmom Posts: 904 Member
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    I would also suggest finding a specialized trainer. In the Lafayette area (Indiana) we have a gym that is also connected to a rehabilitation group. So they have trainers that know how to work with people with injuries or other conditions that make exercise tough. See if you can find something like that in your area. If you are overweight, it may even be something your doctor can proscribe so your medical insurance might cover some of it.

    Good luck!!:flowerforyou:
  • krista010105
    krista010105 Posts: 149 Member
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    I dont have issues like that but i have a major depression issue and am becomming an more irritated person now after having 4 kids to deal with and a husband that is always at work so i never have any help with them. i have no friends since people are scared to be my friend since i got 4 kids under 9 and they can be very active and annoying to other people. my two older kids fight all the time and my husband works 80 hours a week and we still cant even live pay check to pay check. im constantly depressed from being stuck in my house all thetime with no friends and no spouse and im basically a single mom of 4 when it comes to taking care of the kids. im constantly worring how we are going to pay for shoes for the kids or their lunch money or just buy enough food for the week and still pay rent. so i know what you mean about depression. it takes a huge toll on you. no matter what the cause of it is, it can make you unmotivated. a counselor can help alot just having someone to talk to. i cant get anyone to talk to since we cant pay our bills as it is. but if you can manage get a counselor that you can talk to. if you need to be put on medication have no shame in taking a depression medication. my doctor has me take one some times that is not a constant medicaton but is more situational. when the times get really rough.

    and i can say if you can just get your self out of bed in the morning go for a run or even just a 20 minute walk more if you can though. come home take a shower do your make up you will feel pretty and the walk and shower will refresh you for the day. just me doing my hair and make up my husband notices that i have more of a bounce to me for the day.
  • dirtbikegirl5
    dirtbikegirl5 Posts: 391 Member
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    The first thing that you have to do is get your mind right. With that, the rest of your life will follow.
    I have a liver disease that causes all kinds of issues, including infertility. However, I was able to have children so don't get ahead of yourself and don't give up on that. I have other health issues that I have dealt with over the past 2 years and I have been where you are. You just don't feel normal. Until I made up my mind to live my life instead of living through the health issues, I was doomed and headed for mental instability.
    Now that you have the information, arm yourself with knowledge. So you have to eat like a diabetic. That will kick start you in to eating properly.
    If I were you, I would start small. Try walking, either on a treadmill or outside if the weather is good. Walking is the best exercise and it is low impact so it won't hurt your joints. Once you have done that for a while, then you can add some weights.
    Don't focus on the end result (getting crushed). Focus on getting that stone up the hill, maybe slowly but still getting it up the hill.
    I believe that we all have our own battles and this just happens to be yours. Set your mind to living with these problems, instead of letting them consume you.
  • cartea01
    cartea01 Posts: 156 Member
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    PCOS is a common condition and absolutely isn't degenerative. There are treatments to assist you with fertility (if you have a problem but many women don't!) and the first is one you can do for yourself and is the reason why you're here; losing weight. Yes it is often harder for women with PCOS to lose weight but it isn't impossible. As a previous poster has said, speaking to a dietician is a great idea and don't view a "diabetic diet" as the end of the world. A large majority of people on here would already be eating a diabetic diet because low GI, low sugar, low fat is healthy!

    Weight loss and a diabetic diet will also help you HS and again, the disease isn't always progressive and many patient's experience long periods of admission.

    Yes you've been dealt a difficult hand but you have the power to make a big difference in the courses of these illnesses by getting out of bed and getting moving. It may not be easy, but we'll be here to support you when you're ready.
  • NuttyBrewnette
    NuttyBrewnette Posts: 417 Member
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    Every body has days where life feels overwhelming. I've had my fair share, although for different reasons. Be kind to yourself. Give yourself time to process, grieve really.

    Then, figure out what you gotta do to take care of yourself. Eating right and exercising go a very long way in managing PCOS.

    Life is what it is. Yes, it stinks, it's very unfair. And, at the same time, there are worse things we all could be dealing with.

    Take things one day at a time, do not focus on all the worst case scenarios. Lots of women with PCOS have children. Don't get ahead of yourself, but rather, cross that bridge when you come to it.

    You can get through this, lots of people have. Look to support groups and forums for inspiration and motivation.

    :smile:
  • MrsSmith1112
    MrsSmith1112 Posts: 169 Member
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    There is hope girl!!! I was diagnosed with PCOS 10 years ago. I have an 8 year old daughter. (we're planning on trying for another one after I get married in May.) And as of today, I have lost 80 pounds, making me less than I weighed in middle school! Did I also mention that I DO NOT eat like a diabetic!!! I have to be more careful, sure...but basically I eat what I want! Talk with your doctor. It's possible to live a normal, happy, healthy life...with good food and children if that's what you want!!! Feel free to add me! You gotta find your will power girl. NOTHING is impossible!
  • 1953Judith
    1953Judith Posts: 325 Member
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    You might want to check with your Dr. about whether it is okay to use a silicone wound covering over your sore areas before they open when you exercise. There are some that are an eighth of an inch thick. They don't stick to the skin and you can reuse if it is over an open sore. They are expensive but they can be cut to size so they go a long way. I forget the name of them, but I think you could do a good web search . I used them when I had severe radiation burns under my arms. They were recommended by my doctor. It made a world of difference in my mobility during that time period! I'm giving you my most pragmatic suggestion but wish you luck in coping with these unfair life challenges. You will win!
  • PSUgrl921
    PSUgrl921 Posts: 368 Member
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    Hi there,

    I have never been through anything like you so I don't want to say that I know how you're feeling because I don't. However, I was diagnosed with clinical depression over the summer so I know the hopeless, lack of motivation and overall feeling of sadness that you seem to be having. The best advice I can give you is get to a therapist. I know this can be stigmatized but I can say that my therapist saved my life-- my weight, my grades, everything. I wouldn't get out of bed on a daily basis. I would randomly burst out in tears. My friends started pulling away because I would always have an excuse not to go out. He got me talking with my doctor and, ultimately, on an anti-depressant which helps me to stay on the fast track. But the thing is, even when I couldn't get out of bed, I could exercise. It was the only thing that made me feel better. I know it's hard but even getting out for a walk around the block could help-- fresh air and exercise. If you ever want to talk, shoot me a message. I'd be happy to talk.

    Nicole
  • katatak1
    katatak1 Posts: 261 Member
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    Thank you all for the kind words. I can't read it all right now, as I am at work, but I will address a few things-
    Yes, PCOS is not degenerative, but HS is and getting the PCOS diagnosis was like opening that wound again and knowing that I would have to suffer with another lifelong disease.
    I have not yet seen an endocrinologist. All the endocrinologists in my area (that are any decent) are all scheduled up until March. My gynocologist called me and said "we have the results of your ultrasound, you have PCOS." That was the extent of our conversation, and he hung up shorty thereafter essentially telling me he couldn't help, I'd have to find a specialist.
    As per the infertility (or sub), I feel like I've known my whole life I was infertile- just one of those things I felt like my body was telling me. I've thought that ever since I was very young. While many people with PCOS have babies, I just don't think it's in the cards for me. I refuse to go through fertility treatment, I'm not going to subject my body to that. I've always wanted to adopt, so I know that's an option, it's just depressing to learn that that is probably your only option.
    And yes, I joined a PCOS support group on here, but I haven't found it very supportive yet... I posted my story with no replies. I'll read what you all wrote when I get off work today. Thanks

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