Tired of negativity

Tracy9377
Tracy9377 Posts: 73 Member
edited October 2024 in Motivation and Support
I was recently talking to a woman who could not stop complaining. Her anxiety and desperation were obvious. I felt badly for her, but I was greatly relieved when she left.
Hearing people constantly complain is draining. I know that it is necessary sometimes, but to the extent that I see it. I recently realized that I practice it a lot more than I would like. I don't want to be a drag to other people. I made a list of things I will refrain from doing in the future. Do you have a similar list.
I will refrain from:
Complaining that I am tired. I am able to get through the day - which is more than a lot of others are able to do.
Complaining about little aches and pains. Everyone has them - it's just part of life.
Complaining about people at work. There are 2 sides to every story. I only see one of them.
Complaining about being busy. With such a high unemployment rate, I should never complain that I have work.
Complaining that my kids won't sit still. They are happy and healthy - if I am steady and consistent, they will eventually learn.
Complaining that I can't eat junk food (I'm hypoglycemic and have food allergies). My body won't let me eat things that I shouldn't be eating anyway.
I started "not complaining" a couple of weeks ago. I slip up from time to time, and throw myself a little pity party, but I'm doing better, and I'm feeling happier and more optimistic.
I hope it works for you too!

Replies

  • cameralinds
    cameralinds Posts: 239
    What a great perspective! I'm going to try to adapt this into my life as well.
  • CaptainGordo
    CaptainGordo Posts: 4,437 Member
    :drinker:
  • Sublimely_Self_Righteousreused
    Sublimely_Self_Righteousreused Posts: 935 Member
    I'm complaining about negativity and complaining!
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
    My biggest complaint is people who complain all the time, which in turn makes me complain about them. They're like The Borg and aren't happy until I'm assimilated. :laugh:

    But resistance is NOT futile. :smile:
  • JeSuisPrest
    JeSuisPrest Posts: 2,005 Member
    One of my biggest epiphanies was changing the way I look at things.....just you just did! Kudos to you, I'm fairly certain you are going to feel so much better about life!!
  • Hayesgang
    Hayesgang Posts: 624
    Great attitude!! :flowerforyou:

    I call those type of people "Energy Suckers", it is draining to be with them, and you can feel the energy in the room shift when they leave.
  • killagb
    killagb Posts: 3,280 Member
    downer1.jpg
  • Jhulet
    Jhulet Posts: 32
    Great attitude!! :flowerforyou:

    I call those type of people "Energy Suckers", it is draining to be with them, and you can feel the energy in the room shift when they leave.

    That's SO true! Will have to remember "energy suckers"- will make me laugh next time I am around one!

    Great original post too- and a good reminder!
  • hypotrochoid
    hypotrochoid Posts: 842 Member
    Headphones have improved my life in so many ways... If I can't hear you, I don't have to pretend to care.
  • Jeff92se
    Jeff92se Posts: 3,369 Member
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KuStsFW4EmQ
  • MacMadame
    MacMadame Posts: 1,893 Member
    On a related note, I've decided to cut out all Fat Talk. This is when you bash your body for not being perfect and call yourself bad names when you eat something you weren't planning to. I think people think that they are somehow motivating themselves with this kind of talk but people who don't do actually do better with their eating and health!
  • Cindy311
    Cindy311 Posts: 780 Member
    I call those people emotional vampires! My life is too short for negativity and I love the outlook and path you're taking!
  • ShadowSoldier23
    ShadowSoldier23 Posts: 321 Member
    From the perspective of someone who was raised or learned to be a negative person it is not an easy cycle to break. Although I feel like I am realistic about things, I've been told I'm negative. And I know for a fact that some people have a harder time changing that life long habit than others. I know people who take it too far and I know people who have had some really messed up lives, so I kind of understand why they are the way they are. It's still easier to try and look at things positively though, unless the situation calls for a more realistic approach. lol.
  • ShadowSoldier23
    ShadowSoldier23 Posts: 321 Member
    On a related note, I've decided to cut out all Fat Talk. This is when you bash your body for not being perfect and call yourself bad names when you eat something you weren't planning to. I think people think that they are somehow motivating themselves with this kind of talk but people who don't do actually do better with their eating and health!

    I so agree with this. Bashing yourself is not going to makes things easier. As I like to put it realistically...I'm fat, but I can change it. This doesn't have to be a permanent situation. I don't understand people who cry in the corner over something that most likely they caused. I know it's my fault I am big, I accept that and have moved on to trying to change it! :)
  • enigrebua
    enigrebua Posts: 113 Member
    I agree with you wholeheartedly that complaining about the small stuff constantly can seem unnecessary and draining, however I think there's also an large aspect of it which is just someone's personality - it's how they're wired, how they work. I think being self-aware and recognising parts of your own personality that you could tone down or improve on is a hugely important quality to have, but I think some people, unfortunately, you have to accept the way they are - that's why choosing friends or the people you surround yourself with can be very difficult.
  • LuciaLongIsland
    LuciaLongIsland Posts: 815 Member
    I was recently talking to a woman who could not stop complaining. Her anxiety and desperation were obvious. I felt badly for her, but I was greatly relieved when she left.
    Hearing people constantly complain is draining. I know that it is necessary sometimes, but to the extent that I see it. I recently realized that I practice it a lot more than I would like. I don't want to be a drag to other people. I made a list of things I will refrain from doing in the future. Do you have a similar list.
    I will refrain from:
    Complaining that I am tired. I am able to get through the day - which is more than a lot of others are able to do.
    Complaining about little aches and pains. Everyone has them - it's just part of life.
    Complaining about people at work. There are 2 sides to every story. I only see one of them.
    Complaining about being busy. With such a high unemployment rate, I should never complain that I have work.
    Complaining that my kids won't sit still. They are happy and healthy - if I am steady and consistent, they will eventually learn.
    Complaining that I can't eat junk food (I'm hypoglycemic and have food allergies). My body won't let me eat things that I shouldn't be eating anyway.
    I started "not complaining" a couple of weeks ago. I slip up from time to time, and throw myself a little pity party, but I'm doing better, and I'm feeling happier and more optimistic.
    I hope it works for you too!


    :flowerforyou:
  • fteale
    fteale Posts: 5,310 Member
    Love it! And I totally agree!
  • krystina_letitia9
    krystina_letitia9 Posts: 697 Member
    LOVE this. What a great goal... I should take lessons from you :drinker:
  • MrsLawsonNavyBrat2B
    MrsLawsonNavyBrat2B Posts: 170
    Way to go!! If you focus on the good then it helps a lot! The negative things seem bigger when you pay more attention to them
  • Tracy9377
    Tracy9377 Posts: 73 Member
    Amen!
    On a related note, I've decided to cut out all Fat Talk. This is when you bash your body for not being perfect and call yourself bad names when you eat something you weren't planning to. I think people think that they are somehow motivating themselves with this kind of talk but people who don't do actually do better with their eating and health!
  • traceracer
    traceracer Posts: 303 Member
    Thanks for posting this! I completely agree. In my line of work, I challenge myself everyday to put a smile on everybodys face with a positive attitutde. I rarely ever have to deal with negative people because of this and if I do, I avoid them. Over all though, life is good when you have positive people in it!!:heart:
  • KeriA
    KeriA Posts: 3,355 Member
    I see a distinction between a complainer and one who is doing me the honor of opening up and letting me see a difficulty they are going through. We all have individual learning styles. Some are visual learners, audio learners, kinesthetic and verbal learners. I am the last two so that just the act of talking out a problem helps me to solve it. Audio learners may need to talk things out as well not for the talking but for the hearing of the problem. However if you feel that the person is just complaining about everything and not getting anywhere with the issues they give voice to then that can be draining. I am inspired by those around me that have a positive attitude without complaint but also I am as inspired by those who don't give up in the face of adversity, can be open enough to let others know and demonstrate to others that they are not alone if they are struggling and that we do not have to be bowed under during challenging times. The strongest people are those that see that we need each other and not those that always try to stand alone. I am unemployed right now and I frankly see that many working have something to complain about. I feel that many companies are over working those that they have working for them rather than hiring. I saw my sister-in-law on Christmas Eve and I know that she is being overworked although she didn't mention it then. She is usually contented. Several years ago she had trimmed down and had kept the extra weight off these last years. Last night she didn't look that good and had put on weight. It reminded of myself a few years ago when I had a great job but a killer commute. I am still working off those pounds and I am not bothered by those who are voicing their struggle with being too busy. Frankly I am busier than when I was employed but am grateful that some is from my exercise schedule. So I appreciate you sharing what you learned from approaching life not as something to complain about. It is a wonderful insight. Acting on the idea can make your attitude change.

    I just want to not only share the successes of my friends I want to be there for their challenges as well. When they overcome them they inspire me.
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