Are we all suffering from orhtorexia?
Replies
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no, i'm 5'8" and i secretly want to weight 105 lbs.
i weight 115 now and i'm not happy.
I know your goals aren't realistic or healthy, that's why i brought it up. That's what your biggest concern should be. Not "ORTHTOREXIA"
I live in China. I'm practically FAT here. When i go to H&M to buy jeans, i have to get the BIGGEST size.
Well if you lived in the UK, at that height and weight you would be getting very small sizes.
The Chinese are, on average, of very slight build, aren't they usually quite short people too? You are tall, 115lbs (8 stone 3lbs to anybody in UK) - that's tiny!!
Very good point, and one I was trying to make above. One of my close friends is 6 foot tall. I am 5'2". When I was at my largest I was a 16 and she said she wishes she was that tiny. When we both were at our lowest she was a 14 and I a 6. We were both the same 'size' so to say, she was just a foot taller!!
You cannot compare your size to mine. Also, it depends on body fat. At one point my trainer and I were the same weight. 132. She looked fit, I still looked fat (of course I am getting there again!!:grumble: ) I would grab my 5 lb weights for curls, she her 20 and we would laugh in the mirror. I love her
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no, i'm 5'8" and i secretly want to weight 105 lbs.
i weight 115 now and i'm not happy.
I am 5 ft 2 and 101 pounds... borderline underweight...
But I feel thats where I am normal ...
I wasn't happy any bigger
This depends on age, bone structure and sometimes national origin. I have a petite bone structure. At 21 my weight was 105 and it looked healthy. I have worn a size 6 ring all the way up to 173 lbs. Now I am 50, and a goal weight of 125-135 will look and feel right on me.
When I as 18 I went down to 89 pounds. This was because of a bad breakup, drugs and alcohol, and a bad relationship with food (which later went the other way when I married and had all the money I wanted for any type of food!)
Your weight range is OK for now, just be careful not to lose more or get too obsessed with addl weight loss.
The OP has an unhealthy goal.
Underweight medically =/= Culturally thin.
I live in China too, and it's important to remember that "the nail that sticks up gets hammered down." Complete strangers feel free to come up to you and say "You're so fat!" It's incredibly scarring. The only way to stop the emotional abuse is to lose weight. (Luckily, most expats don't speak enough Chinese to understand what they're saying.)
In this case, she has a point. Losing weight is the only way to preserve your emotional health. If you're working for a Chinese company, your job may also be at stake if you weigh too much by Chinese standards.
She's not crazy. The culture's just sexist.0 -
no, i'm 5'8" and i secretly want to weight 105 lbs.
i weight 115 now and i'm not happy.
I am 5 ft 2 and 101 pounds... borderline underweight...
But I feel thats where I am normal ...
I wasn't happy any bigger
This depends on age, bone structure and sometimes national origin. I have a petite bone structure. At 21 my weight was 105 and it looked healthy. I have worn a size 6 ring all the way up to 173 lbs. Now I am 50, and a goal weight of 125-135 will look and feel right on me.
When I as 18 I went down to 89 pounds. This was because of a bad breakup, drugs and alcohol, and a bad relationship with food (which later went the other way when I married and had all the money I wanted for any type of food!)
Your weight range is OK for now, just be careful not to lose more or get too obsessed with addl weight loss.
The OP has an unhealthy goal.
Underweight medically =/= Culturally thin.
I live in China too, and it's important to remember that "the nail that sticks up gets hammered down." Complete strangers feel free to come up to you and say "You're so fat!" It's incredibly scarring. The only way to stop the emotional abuse is to lose weight. (Luckily, most expats don't speak enough Chinese to understand what they're saying.)
In this case, she has a point. Losing weight is the only way to preserve your emotional health. If you're working for a Chinese company, your job may also be at stake if you weigh too much by Chinese standards.
She's not crazy. The culture's just sexist.
:sick: I am sorry, where did I say she was crazy?
I have worked with people from around the world, and am very aware of cultural differences. I walked back into a job after a summer hiatus and was met with "Oh you so FAT!!" from two different friends. One was from Thailand and the other from Haiti an
My Haitian friend said it was good in her country because that means your rich!
My Thai friend said it was just a realisitic comment the same in his culture as saying "Oh you changed your hair to blond!" Not meant as an insult, just an observation.
No matter where you live, you have to stick up for yourself and your health. At 5'8" 115 pounds cannot be fat-even on the moon.0 -
no, i'm 5'8" and i secretly want to weight 105 lbs.
i weight 115 now and i'm not happy.
I am 5 ft 2 and 101 pounds... borderline underweight...
But I feel thats where I am normal ...
I wasn't happy any bigger
This depends on age, bone structure and sometimes national origin. I have a petite bone structure. At 21 my weight was 105 and it looked healthy. I have worn a size 6 ring all the way up to 173 lbs. Now I am 50, and a goal weight of 125-135 will look and feel right on me.
When I as 18 I went down to 89 pounds. This was because of a bad breakup, drugs and alcohol, and a bad relationship with food (which later went the other way when I married and had all the money I wanted for any type of food!)
Your weight range is OK for now, just be careful not to lose more or get too obsessed with addl weight loss.
The OP has an unhealthy goal.
Underweight medically =/= Culturally thin.
I live in China too, and it's important to remember that "the nail that sticks up gets hammered down." Complete strangers feel free to come up to you and say "You're so fat!" It's incredibly scarring. The only way to stop the emotional abuse is to lose weight. (Luckily, most expats don't speak enough Chinese to understand what they're saying.)
In this case, she has a point. Losing weight is the only way to preserve your emotional health. If you're working for a Chinese company, your job may also be at stake if you weigh too much by Chinese standards.
She's not crazy. The culture's just sexist.
Losing weight is the only way to perserve emotional health!? That's ridiculous! Losing weight so much to an unhealthy extent for OTHERS is just as bad as gaining weight to an unhealthy extent for OTHERS. It's not for herself. Her height on average is above average even in the western culture, and thus her weight would be expected to be more than someone shorter because of sheer mass. Yes, she would have more bone and muscle than her shorter counterparts, even if petite bone structure (i have 14cm wrists and challenge to find others with a structure as small as mine), she is still going to have the illusion of being larger because she IS, but mainly in height. It's like trying to make a tiger become a tabby. The tiger will always be bigger and trying to lose weight will never make it physically smaller than a smaller cat, it will just be unhealthy, risky and damaging for self worth.
If her job depends on her weight more than her skill then that's not a job worth going for. Sexism is worldwide but giving in to it is the worst thing to do. There is a reason women fought for our rights and went through much worse hardships than being told their fat when they are NOT so.
Self esteem and strength is what's needed, not the peer pressure to become underweight.
People her at MFP are here for support, and what i'm trying to say is i will support you if you want to add me and need to talk about anything, life is hard, and peer pressure is difficult, but i've managed to never smoke a cigarette or get into any illegal drugs my whole life. Much the same way it can be difficult as everyone judges. Don't become like them. Be happy to know that they're jealous that you're so tall and beautiful, and that's why they judge you, not because they are right, but because they are jealous.
Rant over.0 -
thing is.. there's no way to go on a diet without thinking about food!.. if you're gonna be successful you need to know how many calories are in what you're eating or how much fat, cos if you keep eating wrong things its never gonna happen!
I was worried about buying kitchen scales for this reason but there was no other way to accurately count calories of fresh food other than know the weight of it to work it out. I found it easier after going low carb/wheat free as I know from what I usually eat this way I never go over 1200 unless I've had a brandy & coke or some chocolate which I usually save for 'cravings week'.
If i got to eat chocolate, i eat it but I exercise that day too so still get a deficit this seems to be working for me without having to count every single calorie so I've felt more able to relax and not obsess as much about whether my carbs went over cos i had cereal for breakfast, bread with lunch and potatoes or pasta with dinner!
I allow potatoes OR rice once a week, gluten free bread 1-2 a week depends how the weight loss is going and I'm happy with a slower loss now I'm within my healthy range now anyway (top end) but want to be in middle.0 -
I have found a cure...
Holiday parties... food... alcohol...
My New Year's Resolution is to suffer from orhtorexia until I return to my goal weight:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:0 -
no, i'm 5'8" and i secretly want to weight 105 lbs.
i weight 115 now and i'm not happy.
I know your goals aren't realistic or healthy, that's why i brought it up. That's what your biggest concern should be. Not "ORTHTOREXIA"0 -
no, i'm 5'8" and i secretly want to weight 105 lbs.
i weight 115 now and i'm not happy.
I am 5 ft 2 and 101 pounds... borderline underweight...
But I feel thats where I am normal ...
I wasn't happy any bigger
This depends on age, bone structure and sometimes national origin. I have a petite bone structure. At 21 my weight was 105 and it looked healthy. I have worn a size 6 ring all the way up to 173 lbs. Now I am 50, and a goal weight of 125-135 will look and feel right on me.
When I as 18 I went down to 89 pounds. This was because of a bad breakup, drugs and alcohol, and a bad relationship with food (which later went the other way when I married and had all the money I wanted for any type of food!)
Your weight range is OK for now, just be careful not to lose more or get too obsessed with addl weight loss.
The OP has an unhealthy goal.
Underweight medically =/= Culturally thin.
I live in China too, and it's important to remember that "the nail that sticks up gets hammered down." Complete strangers feel free to come up to you and say "You're so fat!" It's incredibly scarring. The only way to stop the emotional abuse is to lose weight. (Luckily, most expats don't speak enough Chinese to understand what they're saying.)
In this case, she has a point. Losing weight is the only way to preserve your emotional health. If you're working for a Chinese company, your job may also be at stake if you weigh too much by Chinese standards.
She's not crazy. The culture's just sexist.
Losing weight is the only way to perserve emotional health!? That's ridiculous! Losing weight so much to an unhealthy extent for OTHERS is just as bad as gaining weight to an unhealthy extent for OTHERS. It's not for herself. Her height on average is above average even in the western culture, and thus her weight would be expected to be more than someone shorter because of sheer mass. Yes, she would have more bone and muscle than her shorter counterparts, even if petite bone structure (i have 14cm wrists and challenge to find others with a structure as small as mine), she is still going to have the illusion of being larger because she IS, but mainly in height. It's like trying to make a tiger become a tabby. The tiger will always be bigger and trying to lose weight will never make it physically smaller than a smaller cat, it will just be unhealthy, risky and damaging for self worth.
If her job depends on her weight more than her skill then that's not a job worth going for. Sexism is worldwide but giving in to it is the worst thing to do. There is a reason women fought for our rights and went through much worse hardships than being told their fat when they are NOT so.
Self esteem and strength is what's needed, not the peer pressure to become underweight.
That's not how things work here. Self-esteem and strength will just encourage Chinese people to keep harassing her. They're good enough qualities in men, but the society does everything it can to pound it out of women. White skin does not get you a pass on this the way it does on other things. (I'm assuming she's the person in her icon.)
My advice to the OP: if you don't know Mandarin or the local dialect, don't learn it. Knowing the language will make things worse for you. When Chinese people translate into English, things magically become nicer. For example, "Ni shi pang!" (You are fat) becomes "You're so beautiful!" Living without Mandarin is much, MUCH easier if you stick to the expat neighborhoods of Shanghai, Beijing, Guangzhou, etc. That said, if you're already wise in the ways of indirect communication or are good at reading faces, this won't you help much. But it's better than nothing.People her at MFP are here for support, and what i'm trying to say is i will support you if you want to add me and need to talk about anything, life is hard, and peer pressure is difficult, but i've managed to never smoke a cigarette or get into any illegal drugs my whole life. Much the same way it can be difficult as everyone judges. Don't become like them.
The reality is that after 40+ years of research into the topic, social psychologists don't know who will resist social pressure and who won't. Just because you've been able to resist smoking doesn't mean she will. Anecdote =/= data =/= insight. And if Philip Zimbardo doesn't have much insight into the topic, no one does. Myself included.
To the OP: I think social psychology is asking the right questions. Even though it's most famous for torturing people. You can connect the dots yourself.Be happy to know that they're jealous that you're so tall and beautiful, and that's why they judge you, not because they are right, but because they are jealous.
Rant over.
Um, no. They think Western women are slutty slut sluts. They don't judge us because they're jealous: they judge us because they genuinely believe that they're better than us. They (incorrectly) believe that they're less promiscuous and more family-oriented than Westerners. Unfortunately, that just isn't true, but since China's not a logocentric society, what's factually true doesn't matter much.
I know you mean well, but coming at an inter-cultural problem from a purely Western perspective isn't always the best approach. If nothing else, the people we have to live/work/interact with on a daily basis don't appreciate it.0 -
no, i'm 5'8" and i secretly want to weight 105 lbs.
i weight 115 now and i'm not happy.
I am 5 ft 2 and 101 pounds... borderline underweight...
But I feel thats where I am normal ...
I wasn't happy any bigger
This depends on age, bone structure and sometimes national origin. I have a petite bone structure. At 21 my weight was 105 and it looked healthy. I have worn a size 6 ring all the way up to 173 lbs. Now I am 50, and a goal weight of 125-135 will look and feel right on me.
When I as 18 I went down to 89 pounds. This was because of a bad breakup, drugs and alcohol, and a bad relationship with food (which later went the other way when I married and had all the money I wanted for any type of food!)
Your weight range is OK for now, just be careful not to lose more or get too obsessed with addl weight loss.
The OP has an unhealthy goal.
Underweight medically =/= Culturally thin.
I live in China too, and it's important to remember that "the nail that sticks up gets hammered down." Complete strangers feel free to come up to you and say "You're so fat!" It's incredibly scarring. The only way to stop the emotional abuse is to lose weight. (Luckily, most expats don't speak enough Chinese to understand what they're saying.)
In this case, she has a point. Losing weight is the only way to preserve your emotional health. If you're working for a Chinese company, your job may also be at stake if you weigh too much by Chinese standards.
She's not crazy. The culture's just sexist.
Losing weight is the only way to perserve emotional health!? That's ridiculous! Losing weight so much to an unhealthy extent for OTHERS is just as bad as gaining weight to an unhealthy extent for OTHERS. It's not for herself. Her height on average is above average even in the western culture, and thus her weight would be expected to be more than someone shorter because of sheer mass. Yes, she would have more bone and muscle than her shorter counterparts, even if petite bone structure (i have 14cm wrists and challenge to find others with a structure as small as mine), she is still going to have the illusion of being larger because she IS, but mainly in height. It's like trying to make a tiger become a tabby. The tiger will always be bigger and trying to lose weight will never make it physically smaller than a smaller cat, it will just be unhealthy, risky and damaging for self worth.
If her job depends on her weight more than her skill then that's not a job worth going for. Sexism is worldwide but giving in to it is the worst thing to do. There is a reason women fought for our rights and went through much worse hardships than being told their fat when they are NOT so.
Self esteem and strength is what's needed, not the peer pressure to become underweight.
That's not how things work here. Self-esteem and strength will just encourage Chinese people to keep harassing her. They're good enough qualities in men, but the society does everything it can to pound it out of women. White skin does not get you a pass on this the way it does on other things. (I'm assuming she's the person in her icon.)
My advice to the OP: if you don't know Mandarin or the local dialect, don't learn it. Knowing the language will make things worse for you. When Chinese people translate into English, things magically become nicer. For example, "Ni shi pang!" (You are fat) becomes "You're so beautiful!" Living without Mandarin is much, MUCH easier if you stick to the expat neighborhoods of Shanghai, Beijing, Guangzhou, etc. That said, if you're already wise in the ways of indirect communication or are good at reading faces, this won't you help much. But it's better than nothing.People her at MFP are here for support, and what i'm trying to say is i will support you if you want to add me and need to talk about anything, life is hard, and peer pressure is difficult, but i've managed to never smoke a cigarette or get into any illegal drugs my whole life. Much the same way it can be difficult as everyone judges. Don't become like them.
The reality is that after 40+ years of research into the topic, social psychologists don't know who will resist social pressure and who won't. Just because you've been able to resist smoking doesn't mean she will. Anecdote =/= data =/= insight. And if Philip Zimbardo doesn't have much insight into the topic, no one does. Myself included.
To the OP: I think social psychology is asking the right questions. Even though it's most famous for torturing people. You can connect the dots yourself.Be happy to know that they're jealous that you're so tall and beautiful, and that's why they judge you, not because they are right, but because they are jealous.
Rant over.
Um, no. They think Western women are slutty slut sluts. They don't judge us because they're jealous: they judge us because they genuinely believe that they're better than us. They (incorrectly) believe that they're less promiscuous and more family-oriented than Westerners. Unfortunately, that just isn't true, but since China's not a logocentric society, what's factually true doesn't matter much.
I know you mean well, but coming at an inter-cultural problem from a purely Western perspective isn't always the best approach. If nothing else, the people we have to live/work/interact with on a daily basis don't appreciate it.
Um i don't work, I study Chinese language in Beijing. Nobody ever said to me "ni hen pang" (you're fat). In fact a lot of chinese people asked me if i was a model. but looking at all those crazy skinny girls out there makes me a bit unconscious about what "normal" is.
I read all your messages and you girls have a point. I'm not too skinny nor do i suffer from anorexia, i eat around 1500 kcal most of the time. but i used to weight 110 and i felt beautiful, so i thought 105 would be even better, i just like the "skinny" look.
I know many girls who are very skinny and healthy and they still eat.
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no, i'm 5'8" and i secretly want to weight 105 lbs.
i weight 115 now and i'm not happy.
TO ME THAT IS TOO THIN. Have you asked a doctor? I would. My friend is 4'11 and weighs 85 pounds due ti severe celiac. She looks horrible an knows it. At 110 she looks great!!!0 -
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Um i don't work, I study Chinese language in Beijing. Nobody ever said to me "ni hen pang" (you're fat). In fact a lot of chinese people asked me if i was a model. but looking at all those crazy skinny girls out there makes me a bit unconscious about what "normal" is.
I read all your messages and you girls have a point. I'm not too skinny nor do i suffer from anorexia, i eat around 1500 kcal most of the time. but i used to weight 110 and i felt beautiful, so i thought 105 would be even better, i just like the "skinny" look.
I know many girls who are very skinny and healthy and they still eat.
[/quote]
Thanks for the insight. If that is a picture of you in your AV, you are thin. Maintain and enjoy. It is nice you are blessed to be ensconced in another culture (although I am unsure where you are from originally)
Have a lovely day!! :flowerforyou:0 -
aw thanks, you too
yes that's my picture. i'm from serbia (south-east europe).0 -
In a society where food is not a rarity but is in overabundance, most of us need to keep track of what we eat and impose limits on ourselves. This state of an overabundance of food is a very very recent and completely unnatural phenomenon, so we need to act in an unnatural way to maintain a natural state.0
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In a society where food is not a rarity but is in overabundance, most of us need to keep track of what we eat and impose limits on ourselves. This state of an overabundance of food is a very very recent and completely unnatural phenomenon, so we need to act in an unnatural way to maintain a natural state.
What a perfect statement.0 -
Thank you.0
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Well that's not true. 115 pounds on the moon is 700 pounds on Earth.No matter where you live, you have to stick up for yourself and your health. At 5'8" 115 pounds cannot be fat-even on the moon.0 -
Yes, I know some fitness nuts who are just no fun to be around, because they're too uptight about everything.
The food chain is a huge conspiracy!
Eating meat is evil....
The government wants us fat and unhealthy
The medical profession is controlled by the pharmaceutical industry
Fluoride in toothpaste is for mind control
And on and on and on....
I avoid such toxic people like the plague! This gloomy lot of fruitcakes take small measures of truth and just obsess over it.
NO THANKS!
This^^^ Sums it up perfectly!0 -
Yes, I know some fitness nuts who are just no fun to be around, because they're too uptight about everything.
The food chain is a huge conspiracy!
Eating meat is evil....
The government wants us fat and unhealthy
The medical profession is controlled by the pharmaceutical industry
Fluoride in toothpaste is for mind control
And on and on and on....
I avoid such toxic people like the plague! This gloomy lot of fruitcakes take small measures of truth and just obsess over it.
NO THANKS!
This^^^ Sums it up perfectly!
I agree!0 -
no, i'm 5'8" and i secretly want to weight 105 lbs.
i weight 115 now and i'm not happy.
I know your goals aren't realistic or healthy, that's why i brought it up. That's what your biggest concern should be. Not "ORTHTOREXIA"
I live in China. I'm practically FAT here. When i go to H&M to buy jeans, i have to get the BIGGEST size.
Much of the Chinese population is SHORT, you're 5'8" ...that might be why you have to get the "BIGGEST size". For your height you are actually considered underweight by all of the BMI charts and calculators that I've seen.0 -
no, i'm 5'8" and i secretly want to weight 105 lbs.
i weight 115 now and i'm not happy.
I know your goals aren't realistic or healthy, that's why i brought it up. That's what your biggest concern should be. Not "ORTHTOREXIA"
I live in China. I'm practically FAT here. When i go to H&M to buy jeans, i have to get the BIGGEST size.
Much of the Chinese population is SHORT, you're 5'8" ...that might be why you have to get the "BIGGEST size". For your height you are actually considered underweight by all of the BMI charts and calculators that I've seen.
I agree with the last post. Im 5``7 and I am 125lbs and that is still under for MY height and youre an inch taller than me. I do not agree at all that it is okay to be 105lbs at 5``8 no matter where you live.0
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