Rant about schools

hiddensecant
hiddensecant Posts: 2,446 Member
edited September 19 in Chit-Chat
So my son's school has been attempting to transition him into General Ed which has failed for many reasons. He can do the work but the crowded classroom makes him too anxious to actually do it. He does the homework fine and it goes to school every Friday but they can't seem to make sure he turns it in. They also lost him at a class field trip because they neglected to arrange for him to have an aid that day (which is in his IEP). But anyway, lots of issues and even more that I wont go into.

About a month ago, I wrote a note to the school requesting that he be transferred back to the old schedule which was Special Ed with the exception of math and reading. But lately we've been deciding on whether or not to transfer him out of General Ed compltely because he hasn't improved since then.

... Just today I found out that he has not been switched back and that they want to meet about that note next week. :angry: The note went to school on May 1st! We gave it directly to the bus driver to be sure it made its way to a teacher that day. I mean WTH?

Replies

  • This content has been removed.
  • JJs25th
    JJs25th Posts: 204 Member
    I understand your frustration. We went through something very similare when our son developed sinus/polp disease in the 6th grade and our frustration did not end until he graduated high school. I would strongly suggest that if his father has not been at the school meetings with you, that he start attending. If either of you have a profession that requires a uniform (police, sherriff, military), wear it. Having my husband attend seemed to get their attention. a good friend of ours had her husband go in his sherrif's uniform -- that got their attention as well. I know it is stupid that they seem to pay more attention when the father shows up -- but they did in our cases. Hope this is helpful.
  • ltullos83
    ltullos83 Posts: 2
    Hey there, here's some advice from a teacher - never write a note - especially when it comes to something as important as your son's comfort and success. Setting a conference and then getting everything in writing is the way to go. Administrators get busy and the unexpected will always come up so notes tend to go by the wayside. Plus, you sending a note does not put the ball in your court.

    While I do not know anything about your school or your son's exact situation, it sounds like a resource class may be a good fit for him if that is something you have not tried yet. It's not complete inclusion. It gives your son the chance complete all the general education assignments in a peaceful area. Or perhaps, you could try having him sit at his own special "station" while he is in the general room when he is in there learning new material. I mean a section of the class where he can have his own space and isn't boxed in by other students.

    Just some thoughts. :)
    Respectfully,
    Liz
  • hiddensecant
    hiddensecant Posts: 2,446 Member
    My husband attends all meetings with me. And a teacher is required to meet the children at the bus and escort them into the school. It's a special ed bus.
  • azwildcatfan94
    azwildcatfan94 Posts: 314 Member
    Don't be afraid to make some noise. The squeeky wheel and all.
  • angel1face
    angel1face Posts: 110
    OH man i cant get started on schools. :explode: :explode:

    My son is in the same boat. 8 yrs old in grade 2. a specail ED class but full with about 25 kids or more? how is he saposed to learn with that many kids in a class? not to mention keep track of so many kids? the school systems have turned around for the worse if you ask me! but i will not get into this to much. im not happy with the way they are run here. :grumble:
  • hiddensecant
    hiddensecant Posts: 2,446 Member
    Don't be afraid to make some noise. The squeeky wheel and all.

    Yeah, I'm having hubby call when he gets home because I know I'll be too upset if I call myself.
  • hiddensecant
    hiddensecant Posts: 2,446 Member
    OH man i cant get started on schools. :explode: :explode:

    My son is in the same boat. 8 yrs old in grade 2. a specail ED class but full with about 25 kids or more? how is he saposed to learn with that many kids in a class? not to mention keep track of so many kids? the school systems have turned around for the worse if you ask me! but i will not get into this to much. im not happy with the way they are run here. :grumble:

    I think there are about 20 in the special ed but the teacher has 2 aids at all times. The general ed has over 30 with one teacher and they all sit shoulder to shoulder.
  • pfeif21
    pfeif21 Posts: 27
    Sometimes decisions are made and it is out of the teacher's hands. I would try to remain calm before you start screaming at the teacher just because you are frustrated with the situation. It takes a lot of people to make a school work, not just the one. I agree about not trusting the bus driver with the note. Not to sound negative, but it's possible the bus driver doesn't care as much as you do to make sure the note gets where it needs to go. Use a phone. Notes are not an effective strategy for getting someone's attention and you can get someone's attention without yelling at them. Teachers and administrators have a lot of things they need to take care of in a fast paced day; it's possible the note got pushed to the "wayside" as someone else said. Be an advocate for your child, yes, but being angry is not always being a good advocate. Sometimes it hurts the child instead of helps them and their situation.
  • hiddensecant
    hiddensecant Posts: 2,446 Member
    Sometimes decisions are made and it is out of the teacher's hands. I would try to remain calm before you start screaming at the teacher just because you are frustrated with the situation. It takes a lot of people to make a school work, not just the one. I agree about not trusting the bus driver with the note. Not to sound negative, but it's possible the bus driver doesn't care as much as you do to make sure the note gets where it needs to go. Use a phone. Notes are not an effective strategy for getting someone's attention and you can get someone's attention without yelling at them. Teachers and administrators have a lot of things they need to take care of in a fast paced day; it's possible the note got pushed to the "wayside" as someone else said. Be an advocate for your child, yes, but being angry is not always being a good advocate. Sometimes it hurts the child instead of helps them and their situation.

    Why does everyone assume I'm about to go postal on the teacher or that the note never got there? It got there. It's a special ed bus. The driver not only takes notes from parents but it is also their responsibility to distribute notes when they drop off the children. This is how they communicate. I didn't set up the system. I'm only following it.

    And who said I was about to yell at anyone? I don't yell. Someone else mentioned making some noise but that wasn't me.
  • slawdawg
    slawdawg Posts: 13
    Happy SPED teacher here with some things to think about.

    1) The number of children in a class is directly related to the amount of money the state and/or feds will provide for teachers. There are legal limits to class size, especially for SPED, but the kids keep coming and being identified as needing extra help, so they continue to be dumped into classes that are already too large. It literally takes and act of congress to fix this. IDEA has never been fully-funded, so the issues continue.

    2) Along with huge classes, each teacher is also responsible for managing the paperwork for those children, which is a ridiculously daunting task. Meetings have to be scheduled and can't just be a normal teacher conference. We have to have a representative form all branches of the school (general ed, special ed, a representative of the system, etc. It can take a while to align all the schedules to get everyone there at the same time.

    3) You should be offered a "continuum of services." It should not be a choice between general ed or sepcial ed classes. Sounds to me (and I don't know particulars such as the child's particular disability) like a general ed class would be fine if there were another certified special ed teacher in the room with him (and others). We call this a collaborative model or coteching model. This provides access to the general curriculum, but provides the extra support needed to be successful. Resource classes (pull out) are not always the best because the instruction and activities can be sacrificed when a teacher is responsible for teaching numerous subject areas and/or grade levels at the same time.

    There are probably other things I could suggest as well, but without knowing the individual (it is, after all, an Individual Education Plan) it's hard to say. Fight to keep him in general classes. Be sure that the teachers are following the modifications and accomodations given in the IEP. And if all else fails, mention a "non-compliance" lawsuit and that will get the heads spinning with ways to help your child be successful.
  • becbec71
    becbec71 Posts: 136
    It can be very daunting to get it all together. My daughter will be a frshman in HS next year. I started fighting for her in 2nd grade. She has ADD. Mostly the sttention thing. We moved and are in a new school district now and she is finally getting help in math and all ofher teachers are aware and are all willing to work with her.

    My son is in second grade. He has full blown ADHD. He got kicked out of preschool when he was 3. I could manage him off of meds but the teachers refused too. I took it to our school system as they have a pre-school program. They told me nope but they would get at him as soon as he started Kindy. I fought and fought and got no where. Again come to this year and a new school system and guess what? He is getting, PT, OT, readng and math help. He goes to a spec program in the am for extra OT to get focused for the day. He is allowed to type instead of print but is still forced to work on his writing in OT. He has shortened spelling also. I go Thursday for his 504 plan meeting so all of this will follow him next year. I thank God we moved because he would have been just passed along at the old one. It does really depend on the distict in all areas, staff, funding, ect to get the help we need. and it is so frustrating when we feel like we are the only ones trying to get the best for our children.

    Good luck!!!
  • hiddensecant
    hiddensecant Posts: 2,446 Member
    3) You should be offered a "continuum of services." It should not be a choice between general ed or sepcial ed classes. Sounds to me (and I don't know particulars such as the child's particular disability) like a general ed class would be fine if there were another certified special ed teacher in the room with him (and others). We call this a collaborative model or coteching model. This provides access to the general curriculum, but provides the extra support needed to be successful. Resource classes (pull out) are not always the best because the instruction and activities can be sacrificed when a teacher is responsible for teaching numerous subject areas and/or grade levels at the same time.

    He used to go to a district that had the special ed and general ed in the same class and he did well there ... but it's not offered in this district. Our choices are pretty much special ed or general ed.

    There is one class that we're holding out for that specializes in communication delays but it's not offered until the second grade; he's going into the first grade next year. So we're fine with him staying in special ed until then.
  • Marla64
    Marla64 Posts: 23,120 Member
    You could always homeschool--

    *ducks and runs for cover*
  • hiddensecant
    hiddensecant Posts: 2,446 Member
    You could always homeschool--

    *ducks and runs for cover*

    :laugh: :laugh:
  • azwildcatfan94
    azwildcatfan94 Posts: 314 Member

    Why does everyone assume I'm about to go postal on the teacher or that the note never got there? It got there. It's a special ed bus. The driver not only takes notes from parents but it is also their responsibility to distribute notes when they drop off the children. This is how they communicate. I didn't set up the system. I'm only following it.

    And who said I was about to yell at anyone? I don't yell. Someone else mentioned making some noise but that wasn't me.

    I said make some noise, but, I didn't mean yell. I meant, if dealing directly with the teacher doesn't help, don't be afraid to go to the principal. If that doesn't work, go to the next level up the chain, etc. until you get the proper education for your child. I agree that all teachers are under funded, whether it is sp-ed or not. So, the people that keep "bugging" the schools about the proper education for their children will eventually get it. Especially when the schools are legally obligated to provide it (like in Sp-ed/ IEP situations).
  • sonjavon
    sonjavon Posts: 1,019 Member
    Marla - I was going to say the same thing.
    My son is dyslexic and I fought the school district from Kindergarten to 3rd grade to get him the help that he needs. Everything that they offered was ummm.... less than adequate. At the end of 3rd grade I made the decision to keep him home. We had a wonderful 4th and 5th grade year here at home. It took a lot of sacrifice from a financial standpoint, I quit my job as a recruiter to stay home. We gave up eating out as much (not a bad thing from a weight loss standpoint), we don't go to as many movies and we're a lot more creative with our curriculum than some homeschoolers... but it works and I wouldn't change a thing. I love having him home. I get all the "good" hours... ya know, when he's not cranky and whiny! I get to see the "lightbulb moments" when he finally gets the concepts that we've been working on.

    I won't say that I wasn't torn when I made the decision to pull him... I felt like I should continue fighting for his rights and MAKE them do right by him... but in the end it came down to one simple thing: I could continue to fight and he could continue to fall more and more behind or I could take matters into my own hands and make sure that he got the education that he deserves. The first few months were hard - he missed his friends, but then they got easier... his self confidence improved and his reading and writing blossomed.

    Obviously homeschooling isn't feasible for everyone - but if you can, it's a great option! If it's not an option for you at this time - find an advocate, someone who can back you up with the school district. Someone who can help to stress URGENCY with the district and the school Good luck!!!!
  • hiddensecant
    hiddensecant Posts: 2,446 Member
    My son is autistic so homeschool really isn't an option. I'm not really concerned about his ability to learn; he can do amazing things with minimal exposure. He even drew planetary maps after his teacher briefly explained a photo of the solar system as she was flipping through a science book.

    But getting him to communicate, speak in complete sentences, understand when a question is being asked, even his OT for writing .. it really needs to be done with specialists which he has access to at school. It's the other times in which they don't know what to do with him that we're fighting on.

    The special ed teacher thought he was too smart to be in her class and felt that she was holding him back. But once in general ed, it's difficult to put him back in special ed; apparently, it's not as easy a switch as special ed to general ed ... In any case, we spoke with the vice principle today and requested that he be put in special ed until the meeting in two weeks (it got moved over). While she says it wont be a problem, we'll just need to call the school tomorrow to be sure it happened. We normally can't get anyone on the phone; the only reason why she returned our call this time was because she had to reschedule the appointment :noway:.

    And it's not like we can ask him when he gets home. We can ask him to name a country on a map which he does with more accuracy than most high school students, but which class he attended that day or what he had for lunch ... those types of questions continue to elude him.

    EDIT:

    I still don't know why it didn't happen a month ago or why we couldn't be told that it wasn't possible for whatever reason ... but we'll be calling again tomorrow and tying up their phone lines until they confirm that he's in the right class.
  • hiddensecant
    hiddensecant Posts: 2,446 Member
    I said make some noise, but, I didn't mean yell ...

    I know you didn't mean that. Others just seemed to assume I would take it that way or something, hehe.
  • Cindysunshine
    Cindysunshine Posts: 1,188 Member
    I think you have a right to be angry. I am oh so very glad we homeschool! :heart:
  • Nich0le
    Nich0le Posts: 2,906 Member
    you are right to be upset if you feel your concern went unanswered.

    first thing to consider is when you want to make changes like that it is always best to contact the principal and the teacher and set up a time to discuss your son and a possible move. Notes don't always do the trick....unfortunately.

    second, I don't know when school ends for your district, but once May rolls around the work is near if not already completed for the most part. At this point in the year teachers are starting to wrap the school year up, get missing work completed, grades entered and any general testing done and a move this late in the school year may not have been of any benefit to your son.

    Going into a new school year you should make sure he is placed where you think he should be and then monitor his progress with the teacher and make any changes that will help him be sucessful.

    I don't think homeschooling is the answer for everyone, if it works for you great but if that is not an option for you consider going out and finding alternatives that may work better for your son. you can check out schools in your area at greatschools.com and research all types of schools, see parent reviews, state testing stats etc.

    Good luck, my son had to change teachers after x-mas break one year and it was a task but well worth it because his next teacher inspired him to be his best and he ended up with a great school year under his belt! :drinker:
  • Cindysunshine
    Cindysunshine Posts: 1,188 Member
    I agree homeschooling is NOT right for everyone. I am lucky that my dd is easy to teach and does well with homeschooling. It saddens me that our country is failing our children where school is concerned. I went to college to become a teacher. I have taught in 2 public schools. When I had my daughter I knew she would never see a public school classroom as long as I had a say in it. Don't get me wrong, I think there are wonderful public schools out there. I just haven't seen any yet. Cindy :heart:
This discussion has been closed.