Overcoming the Obesity Mindset

Okay after thinking about it, I decided to put the guidelines here as well:

Overcoming the Obesity Mindset
As a person who used to be severely morbidly obese, when I decided that it was time to get serious about losing weight, it was for my health and not my sense of self. I used to tell myself all the time that I was beautiful thick or thin, so I didn’t need to lose weight to be loved. I was lying to myself then, and realize looking back how miserable I was. I ate to feel the emotional voids and the loneliness. When I was depressed, food was my best friend. I lost a lot of weight with the health-related mindset, but as it came off, I began to slowly realize how unhappy I was. The problem is that I never addressed the issue, so I filled the voids with other things. I was still unhappy, and I still “thought fat”, which meant that I didn’t believe in myself. To truly overcome the obesity mindset, you have to learn to love yourself and not fool yourself. That being said, here are some things that I have learned along the way.

1. This is NOT a diet, this is a lifestyle change. Diets are something you do for a while and then abandon. A lifestyle change is something you do the rest of your life. Do not think in short term, think in long term. This is your new future, so embrace it.

2. Be reasonable – How long did you take to put on this weight? Months, years, decades? That is right, you did not put this weight on overnight, and so how is it that you can expect to lose it in just a few months? Set reasonable goals and reward yourself when you reach them. I recommend using SMART goal planning to plot out your goals. SMART stands for specific, measureable, attainable, realistic, and trackable. Saying “I want to lose 50 lbs.” doesn’t give you anything specific, nor a deadline. You can keep saying you want to do this for 20 years and never hold yourself accountable. It is also not reasonable to say “I want to lose 50 lbs. in the next three months.” Not only is this not healthy, it is not attainable for most people, which will set you up for failure.

It is appropriate and healthy to lose about 1.5 lbs. a week or 5-6 lbs. a month. Use this as your guide to create a specific and trackable goal that can be achieved, such as “I want to lose an average of 5 lbs. per month so that in three months, I will have lost 15 lbs. By this time next year, I want to have lost 50 lbs. To do this, I will exercise 4 days a week and consume 1400 calories per day. I will write down my entire food intake and exercise so that I can ensure that I am on goal.” This is specific providing for short-term and long-term goals, able to be easily measured, attainable and realistic, and you have created a provision for tracking success. The nice thing about goals is that they can be modified, and once you have attained them, you can create new goals.

3. Now that you have your goals set, create a rewards system that is not related to food. If your goal is 50 lbs., then reward yourself at 5, 10, 20, 25 (the halfway mark!) 35, 45, and a big reward at 50. It could be a new set of workout shoes, a set of dumbbells, a night out, an outfit, or a small trip. The options are endless, and it gives you a sense of accomplishment so you don’t feel like a donkey chasing a carrot on a stick.

4. Invest in a high-quality scale to weigh on and a seamstress’ measuring tape. Weigh and measure yourself and write down the numbers. Measure bust, waist, hips, arms, thighs, and neck. Now, weigh and measure no more than once per week. If you have to hide the scale and tape to avoid checking yourself every day then do it. You will set yourself up for failure and go nuts if you step on that thing every single day.

5. Start making serious life changes gradually. The first thing that you want to do is address portion sizing and caloric intake. Here are some recommendations:

a. Throw out your dinner plates. I am completely serious on this topic. A plate should be no more than the side of a salad plate. Need guidance here? Look at your Grandma's china she got for her wedding. The dinner plates are the size of our salad plates, the salad bowls are the size of our dinner plates, the soup bowls are the size of our finger bowls, and the platters are the size of our dinner plates. The human mind needs to fill blank space, so you will subconsciously think you are not getting enough food if you carefully measure and weigh the proper portions and it doesn't fill the plate. This will either leave you hungry or you will overeat. The salad plate is filled with the proper portions of food, so you will subconsciously think you ate enough.
b. Get measuring cups, measuring spoons, and a scale. You need them, because as good as you think you are at eyeballing it, you are not that good. Believe me, I thought I was because I am an excellent cook and never measured a darn thing. When I started doing this, I learned that I was getting anywhere from 25-50% more than I thought I should.
c. Prepare healthy snack alternatives and healthy "quick" meals ahead of time. When you are in a hurry, you are tempted to grab something on the go, which can set you up for a bad day. Having something quick and handy helps to keep you on track and you won't have guilt pangs later.
d. Try to avoid processed foods as much as possible. Even the “low-calorie” varieties are high in sodium. Low-fat and low-sodium can be high in calories. They are great in a pinch, but try and cook for yourself.
e. Cook ahead, then package up individual servings. Chicken is cheapest in bulk, so buy a big package of chicken breasts, cook them, and weigh out 3 oz. portions, package, and freeze. It saves time while cooking, and keeps you from overestimating your portion sizes. Do the same with high-quality 97% ground beef or lean ground turkey too. Buy fresh vegetables, wash, cut them up, and package into individual serving sizes. If you eat cereal, do the same.
f. Start replacing out the bad with good...whole wheat instead of white wheat, low carb, high protein, good fiber. Cut back or quit the soda, cut out or replace the sugars. These add un-necessary calories, and will keep you addicted to the junk. Food is an addiction, treat it that way. This includes LOTS AND LOTS of veggies, good amount of fruit, and high quality protein.
g. Not all “healthy” foods are healthy. You may see the labels saying whole wheat, gluten-free, organic, non-GMO, low fat, low sodium, et cetera. That does not mean that these foods are healthy. Check the nutritional information and read the ingredients. Some of these “healthy” foods are extremely high in calories, fat, sodium, and sugars.
h. Even artificial sugars are still sugar. Your body doesn’t know the difference. Try using natural sweeteners such as Stevia, unpasteurized honey, etc. You can treat yourself occasionally, but don’t make it a habit.
i. Rather than 3 meals a day with a gut-busting dinner, opt for 5-6 small meals a day. Balance protein and fiber in your meals, and watch fat and sodium intake. No meal should take ½ of your daily calorie allotment. If you are on 1400 calories (each person will have a different calorie requirement based on age, height, weight, and activity level), then shoot for 200-400 calories for your larger meals and 100-200 for your snacks.

6. Get active – it’s not optional; get off your butt and go. Park at the other end of the parking lot at the store or work (no more spending 20 minutes trolling for a good spot). I mean you’re going to be walking in the store, anyway – right? Dedicate at least 15 minutes three times a week to start and slowly work up your endurance. Eventually be at a minimum of 30 minutes a day four days a week to get active. Going for walks, getting on a treadmill or elliptical, swimming, et cetera are all good ways to start. Keep at it and add to your workouts. The more active you are, the more calories and fat you burn, which in turn leads to losing weight. It’s simple and required to be healthy. Also, try to get a buddy because it helps to have a support network.

7. Celebrate your Non-Scale Victories (NSV) as much as your victories on the scale. Did your measurements go down or did your pants fall off? Did a co-worker do a double take and ask if you lost weight? Did you notice that you are getting more looks than usual from the opposite sex? Celebrate those days and you will continue to feel good about yourself!

8. Don’t deprive yourself too much to the point that you binge. Have a “free day” within reason where you can have something you wouldn’t normally eat. You can still eat out and make healthy choices. Most restaurants post their nutritional information online, so make your food choices before you go out, decline the menu, and order on the spot. It will keep you from giving in to an indulgence you will regret later. Take a day to be a little lazy, but then start your routine immediately the next day. It may be a little difficult if you indulged too much the day before to get back on track, but you will need to so you don’t ruin all you work for.

9. Don’t rationalize your bad habits. Self-talk like “I’ll start tomorrow” and “It’s okay if I do it just this once” and “There’s no point – no one else is trying” need to be removed from your mind. Replace “I can’t” with “I can” and stop comparing yourself with others. This is your life and your journey, so own it 100%. If you have to, get counseling to overcome your insecurities that are holding you back.

10. Had a bad day? Get over it and move on. Don't sit there and do the "I should have" game. Move forward and get back on track without dwelling. When you dwell, you get depressed, and when you are depressed, you eat. This cycle in turn leads to total and complete failure of everything you are working for.

11. Tune out the negative Nancy’s and Nelsons. There are people out there who will not be supportive of what you are doing. These people will have negative things to say and will criticize what you are doing. Tune them out and forget about what they said. You are making a positive change in your life, and whether they are just jealous or unsupportive, you don’t need that. If they are your friends and are trying to sabotage you, then find new friends. Stick with people who have the same mindset as you and you will find the support you need. If your family is unsupportive, avoid those conversations and just ignore their comments.

12. Don’t stop…ever. Once you hit your goal weight, it can be tempting to stop the “plan” because you got where you want to be. The problem with this is that you will go back to old bad habits and gain the weight again. If you are in this to win it, you are in it forever. As I stated before, this is your life and your new future, so get used to it.

13. Pat yourself on the back – once you overcome the obesity mindset, you become free.

Thank you!

I agree, I think everyone with ANY weightloss goals can benefit from this. I LOVE the SMART acronym too!!

Thank you for taking the time to post this!

Thank you! I plan on blogging more about these topics and others, so feel free to subscribe to my blog