How can I help a 16yr old (UK)

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Rozlynmac
Rozlynmac Posts: 71
in Health and Weight Loss
Hi All, my son has a friend who is 16 and a bit overweight. I don't know how much, he looks a wee bit chunky, but isn't approaching obese yet (and to be honest, I'd have thought nothing of it at all if I didn't know otherwise). He's very self conscious though and he's going to the gym a few times a week to work out & try & lose some weight. I'd really like to help him (through my son, I think he'd be mortified if he knew I know how he feels) but don't really know much about helping someone that age who's still growing and developing.

I don't think he's been to see his GP, but I wondered if going and getting a referral to the dietician would help? We live in a remote rural community where there's no access to much in the way of fitness classes or personal trainers etc. Just the local gym and the odd aerobics session over the winter nights.

All suggestions gratefully received please.

Replies

  • charm9
    charm9 Posts: 56 Member
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    You could start doing some more family activities like bike riding or hiking so the focus is not just on him. You could make out its for your benefit and not his. In terms of his diet, you could start making slight changes to the food he is eating (especially if you are cooking his dinners) such as a few more veggies per meal or gradually making the portions a bit smaller. Make gradual changes (again you could say its for the whole families benefit). If you have lots of snacks in the house you could start cutting these down or offering a wider range of healthy snacks.

    It is tricky because he is prob very aware of his problem but doesn't necessarily want to talk to any one about it.
  • Rozlynmac
    Rozlynmac Posts: 71
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    Hi Charm, I agree completely - those are good ideas, unfortunately it's my son's friend, not my son. They go to the gym together and are at school together, so I'm hoping that I can feed information through my son to his friend and help him that way. But I have no idea what he's eating - I think from what I hear he's fairly clued up about what's healthy, but whether or not he follows through in practice is anyone's guess.

    And I think you're right, I think he's embarrassed about it & won't easily talk.
  • olympicathlete
    olympicathlete Posts: 15
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    Honestly, I would just leave him to it. It sounds like he's started up by himself: going to the gym and knowing what's good for you is basically the whole battle. Let it be known to your son that you can give advice through him to his friend if he seems like he needs it, but I know that if any of my friends' parents had tried to talk to me about weight loss, I would be quite upset. If he wants to lose weight, he will.
  • Rozlynmac
    Rozlynmac Posts: 71
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    You're right, I wouldn't humiliate the 2 of them by trying to talk to him. He'd never forgive my son, and my son wouldn't forgive me! I think I agree too about leaving him too it, but I get the impression that he doesn't feel he's getting anywhere, and it would be nice if he could find a way to feel supported, or at least like he was achieving something even if he still kept it private - the boys have no trainer etc at the gym and just do what seems sensible to them from studying PE in school.

    Would you suggest that this site is a good place for him? That would help him feel not so alone maybe - but I haven't spotted a specifically teenage zone and I don't know if the calculations/guidance given here is relevant to someone who's still growing. Although I dunno how it could be slipped into one of their conversations, lol.
  • olympicathlete
    olympicathlete Posts: 15
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    It's so nice that you're so concerned about him :) I'm not too sure about whether I'd recommend the site or not. As you said, it's not tailored for younger growing people. Also, getting bogged down in counting calories as a teenager is no fun! Maybe just keep track of the situation for now - he might get to his own ideal method of doing things by trial and error.
  • charm9
    charm9 Posts: 56 Member
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    Hi Charm, I agree completely - those are good ideas, unfortunately it's my son's friend, not my son. They go to the gym together and are at school together, so I'm hoping that I can feed information through my son to his friend and help him that way. But I have no idea what he's eating - I think from what I hear he's fairly clued up about what's healthy, but whether or not he follows through in practice is anyone's guess.

    And I think you're right, I think he's embarrassed about it & won't easily talk.

    So sorry I must have read it too quick and missed that bit.

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