Is it WRONG to ask for Surgery?

Aviendha_RJ
Aviendha_RJ Posts: 600 Member
edited November 2024 in Motivation and Support
I'm currently jobless, and undergoing a massive amount of stress. I'm selling my house, searching for work, moving back in with my Dad at 29, & I'm in a great relationship with this amazing guy... who rushed me to the hospital Christmas Morning convinced my appendix was going to burst. It's actually a 3cm ovarian cyst: too big to go away by itself, too small to technically be surgical. It's started leaking infection into my various lady-bits & causing massive amounts of pain, discomfort, nausea, dizziness... etc., etc. I'm getting now to the point where intimacy is uncomfortable, or causes pain afterward, & I'm taking narcotic strength painkillers that knock me for a loop for several hours a few times per week because I wake up with/get suddenly surprised with pain severe enough to put me in cold sweats, & curl me in a fetal position. :explode:

I have a history of depression, & with everything in my life spinning out of control, from my finances to my crappy relationship with my sister, to insomnia... & suddenly I have this cyst that piles pain on top of everything? :sad:

My Doctor says wait till it's 6-8cm. But affecting my LIFESTYLE: I can't work out, snowboard... etc., etc. I have a friend went through this for over a year, she lost an ovary & filopian tube to it, & about 12 months of intimacy with her fiance. She said if hers had been smaller than 10cm, they could have taken it out with a 1" incision laproscopically with suction, & she would have had 1 day in hospital & a week to recover... vs what she had: 3 days in hospital, & 6 weeks recovery. :huh:

I made an appointment with my doctor about this... but I want to ask for surgery because I just feel like I should be able to control my body & what happens to it. I feel like... surgery should be treating the mind as well as the body in this case... taking something off my plate, so that I can focus on the rest.

Is it wrong for me to want someone to just CUT ME OPEN & bloody fix this? :cry:

Replies

  • dlaplume2
    dlaplume2 Posts: 1,658 Member
    If it is causing you that much pain and he doesn't suggest a way to fix it, Surgical or non invasive, (there may be other options) I would find another dr.

    That is not normal, but there are a lot of other ways to treat cysts, so look at other options before surgery if you can.

    Best wishes and I hope you feel better soon.
  • dodson169
    dodson169 Posts: 20
    You should ask about all of your options including surgery and then get a second (and maybe third) opinion from other doctors if you are not satisfied. If this is causing you that much pain and is interfering with normal life, you should research ALL your options. If all the doctors agree, then maybe that's the right course of treatment. Best wishes!
  • samantha64118
    samantha64118 Posts: 71
    It's not wrong, because there is nothing you can do to fix it, and like you said it's severely affecting your life. I also agree that if he says no, then get a second opinion from another doctor. Good luck & I hope you get better soon, in whatever way that may be.
  • sylvuz323
    sylvuz323 Posts: 468 Member
    If its causing you that kind of pain then I definitely think there is reason for you to want it out and quick. I had a Uterine Fibroid/Tumor that reached about 9 cm (size of a newborns head) and my OB/Gyn doc was more than happy to remove it. Of course she just enjoys the surgeon part of her job.

    I'd definitely get a second opinion. If they are going to make you wait, maybe consider seeing a Homeopathic doctor.
  • jlemoore
    jlemoore Posts: 702 Member
    Stick to your guns. Don't tell them what it right for your body.
  • scapez
    scapez Posts: 2,018 Member
    Do some research on the condition and available options and find another doctor. Good luck. :flowerforyou:
  • JennieAL
    JennieAL Posts: 1,726 Member
    I would definitely get a 2nd and even 3rd opinion!! And no, it's not wrong to want to be cut open and get that thing out! I totally understand this. When I was 20 I got sick very suddenly and had nausea, sharp pains in my lower ab, vomiting, fever... after extensive testing for HOURS it seemed they finally did an unltrasound and then asked me for my permission to give me anesthesia and perform emergency surgery. I thanked them profusely and begged them to go ahead... do it quickly and put me out of my misery... not kidding, I honestly didn't care what it was. It was so painful that I just wanted to be knocked out.

    It turned out to be just some random, benign cyst (flat like a pancake and as big as a grapefruit) growing in between my organs. Had to be taken out right away.

    I would definitely get a 2nd opinion and not be afraid to speak up for yourself to ANY doctor. Hope you get it taken care of! Good luck.
  • traceyjj
    traceyjj Posts: 406 Member
    I had an ovarian cyst which was found at the same time I was pregnant with my eldest... It grew alarmingly quickly, but my doctor advised immediate surgery in case the cyst twisted and ruptured which could have caused major complications... I was operated on the same week (the cyst was the size of a melon when they took it from me, and had grown around the ovary so they had to remove that too) and thankfully I still was pregnant.

    Dont leave it too long before you get it sorted. It can cause all sorts of problems if not looked at properly. The doctors thought I would never conceive again, but I had twins 3 years later, and then another child a further 5 years later... which is when they found another cyst. That time they couldnt operate until the baby was born... but by the time they operated on that one, it had grown too big to save the one ovary I had left... and they ended up giving me a full hysterectomy... in my early 30s.

    Good luck in getting it sorted out quickly.
  • izzydino
    izzydino Posts: 254 Member
    i have had those... they aren't fun! My sister had to have her's removed... Talk to your doctor about your concerns. If he/she won't help you find a solution it maybe time for a second opinion.
  • cramernh
    cramernh Posts: 3,335 Member
    First things first, I see you are amongst our Canadian members - bonjour!!!!!!!!

    As someone who has over 14 years in the medical field, let me give you some advice about how to approach this.... and this will definitely be key in communicating with the surgeons you have a consultation with. Here in the states, this is how I would compose a pre-determination of surgery to the insurance companies (where you are in Canada, you would need to consider this for the consultation w/the surgeon)

    You must list everything that your daily life is compromised as a result of this cyst that was discovered.
    1.) List what symptoms you are having. On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being you just cant breathe because the pain is uncontrollable, indicate your pain level.
    2.) Indicate, a list if necessary, what triggers the pain.... this is where you would need to characterize what actions you are doing during the normal course of the day that have triggered the pain.
    3.) Explain mobility issues: the ability to lift, push, pull, carry, nudge. Example: The act of getting dressed or undressed (yes, I know its silly but it really does matter).
    4.) How this affects your ability to work - whether in the home or out of the home. This can be environmentally a counterproductive situation
    5.) Marital affects: let's face it, sexual health is equally important as personal health. The fact that sexual intercourse is definitely painful...
    6.) Your immediate medical history can also play a factor as well.

    To effectively communicate with a surgeon reviewing your medical files, the one thing the files never fully indicate, are the facts that directly affect you and your life, and your family outside the walls of a medical exam room.

    The impact that you are having right now with just a 3cm cyst is where you need to honestly report to the surgeon is vital.

    To have to wait until the cyst grows until 6cm is not an option....but there are factors to which a surgeon would say 'it would be better if you waited".... THIS part, I would definitely be questioning the WHY..... because it sounds to me you left that office without getting the proper level of patient education - SHAME on that surgeon......


    Mind you, I didnt see a description indicating where exactly this cyst was found... there are many areas of the ovary that can get even more descriptive.... and effects can either be little or severe.

    Let me know if you would like some help... I would be more than happy to help you if you have any questions....
  • StacyFrisbie
    StacyFrisbie Posts: 159 Member
    I'm currently jobless, and undergoing a massive amount of stress. I'm selling my house, searching for work, moving back in with my Dad at 29, & I'm in a great relationship with this amazing guy... who rushed me to the hospital Christmas Morning convinced my appendix was going to burst. It's actually a 3cm ovarian cyst: too big to go away by itself, too small to technically be surgical. It's started leaking infection into my various lady-bits & causing massive amounts of pain, discomfort, nausea, dizziness... etc., etc. I'm getting now to the point where intimacy is uncomfortable, or causes pain afterward, & I'm taking narcotic strength painkillers that knock me for a loop for several hours a few times per week because I wake up with/get suddenly surprised with pain severe enough to put me in cold sweats, & curl me in a fetal position. :explode:

    I have a history of depression, & with everything in my life spinning out of control, from my finances to my crappy relationship with my sister, to insomnia... & suddenly I have this cyst that piles pain on top of everything? :sad:

    My Doctor says wait till it's 6-8cm. But affecting my LIFESTYLE: I can't work out, snowboard... etc., etc. I have a friend went through this for over a year, she lost an ovary & filopian tube to it, & about 12 months of intimacy with her fiance. She said if hers had been smaller than 10cm, they could have taken it out with a 1" incision laproscopically with suction, & she would have had 1 day in hospital & a week to recover... vs what she had: 3 days in hospital, & 6 weeks recovery. :huh:

    I made an appointment with my doctor about this... but I want to ask for surgery because I just feel like I should be able to control my body & what happens to it. I feel like... surgery should be treating the mind as well as the body in this case... taking something off my plate, so that I can focus on the rest.

    Is it wrong for me to want someone to just CUT ME OPEN & bloody fix this? :cry:

    Absolutely not. Ask for it to be removed. If he doesn't want to, ask for a biopsy, and while he's in there to take it out....
This discussion has been closed.

Categories