Ever been told by a friend that you will never be THAT skinn
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I constantly get told by someone that I will never fit back into a UK size 10. I started this journey to get my BMI down but I refuse to stop until I am back in a size 10.
I completely agree with other posters, it's not about you succeeding, it's about them failing to strive for what they want. Nobody wants to be beaten and by us getting down to a certain size, no longer being the 'fat one' of the group or anything else that we succeed in doing, it proves it can be done and proves that by them saying it's not possible, that they are just being lazy.
Good luck with your goals and I hope you reach them soon.0 -
You find that your friends and even family have you slotted into a "role" and if you change your role (from chubby or fat friend, or even "bigger-than-me-at-least" friend to equal or skinner than, suddenly THEY are uncomfortable with their new role that you forced them into and that means they have to adjust or make a change themselves.
this is the truth. Nobody likes to admit it, but no "fat" girl wants to go bathing suit shopping with a "skinny" girl, even if you are close friends! But most likely they would be fine doing the same shopping with a friend who weighed close to or more than them. If the bigger person suddenly gets smaller, it makes them have to look deep into themselves and most people are scared to do that. They like the status quo.0 -
When I told people that I wanted to lose 40 pounds before me wedding ALL I heard was "That's too much," but they don't know my weight, or my BMI, or that my goal weigh is within my healthy weight range for my height. My fiancé was the worst. Now that I'm half way there I don't hear it a s much. I think it helps that I got a lot of my friends on MFP!0
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There is a wonderful print that my sister found for me a few years back when someone told me that I couldn't finish an ivy league education in four years with a double major and a jobs, it says "The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it." She was right by the way, I finished in three with two jobs and an internship
Ignore the haters, sometimes we don't even realize the greatness we can accomplish, how can they? 0 -
i once had a so called best friend who told me to "aim lower" when looking at guys....harsh,
but now iv found myself a wonderful boyfriend whos drop dead gorgeous and she can eat her words!!!
I was told that too. :grumble:
But now I get told I'll never "look feminine" cuz I'm pretty boy shaped. F uck em all anyway.0 -
Is it horrible that I'm kind of crazy like that and just because they said you will never be "THAT" skinny, that the next time I see them I will be sure to be "THAT" skinny because they have added kerosene to the inferno burning inside of me.
I did that too...and wound up with an eating disorder. I totally get the sentiment and wanting to prove that you can be fit, healthy, etc - [and I'm NOT saying you're headed for an ED!] just don't go overboard. Above all, get fit and healthy for YOU first. :flowerforyou:0 -
It's your boobies.0
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yes.. while pregnant.
boy was i glad when i proved them wrong!0 -
I'm not skinny now; but I was, once upon a time. As a teenager I could eat whatever I wanted and it didn't change a thing. Unfortunately that came to a screeching halt in my mid-twenties.
Anyway, I had multiple friends look at me with nothing but concern in their eyes and ask me if I was anorexic. I was the furthest thing from, I just was too busy to eat. I didn't want to stop whatever I was doing and sit down and eat and what I did eat, most of the time, was junk.
So my point is, yes, it's annoying to hear people say that stuff. Absolutely, but they may just be concerned.0 -
It pisses me off too...
One time, I had someone tell me that (after coming so far and having lost 30+ pounds) that the only way I could ever lose the weight I want to and be as skinny as I want to be is to starve myself from now on because I have a big frame. Now it was meant "kiddingly," but it still hurt to hear that the support wasn't as serious as I hoped it to be!
It just gives me even more motivation to drop more weight - no matter how difficult it will be from here
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It happened to me a lot when I first lost weight. It didn't make me angry cause I think it was just such a shock seeing me wearing a size 4 after decades of being a size 22-24. I just looked so different to them. People said things like " you shouldn't lose any more weight". I am not TOO thin. I am actually 5-10 pounds over my ideal weight for my 5'1" height. But It has been fun walking up to people I have not seen for a couple of years and watching them trying to figure out who I am. :happy:0
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The first person that tells me I look too skinny...or that I may blow away....I may kiss them right in the mouth! lol. I'm just staring my journey...so I'm sure it will be a looong time before this happens to me :bigsmile:0
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The first person that tells me I look too skinny...or that I may blow away....I may kiss them right in the mouth! lol. I'm just staring my journey...so I'm sure it will be a looong time before this happens to me :bigsmile:
LOL!0 -
I've never been told that before but I have been told by my hubby that if I lose all my weight he is sure I will cheat on him. He'll get really mad about it too.0
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my "friend" is a size 8/10 uk and is forever going on about how fat she is and that she has no waist and needs to lose weight. im a size 14 uk and she has the nerve to tell me after her complaining that i dont need to lose weight id be too skinny if i lost weight and that id look gaunt!! well excuse me if you think youre fat what the hell am i?! a bloody hippo! and to say i shouldnt lose weight well its just a kick in the teeth!! i almost feel like she doesnt want me losing weight because then she wouldnt be the skinny one!! grrrrrr does my nut in!!0
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My one sister models for Boscov's petite women dresses. One day I said to her that I'm trying to lose weight because I'm too fat and she goes, "You're not fat!"
Then she proceeds to tell me that her 6 year old daughter wears her(my sis's) AE shirts to school because she has a bunch of polo ones. I asked, "You mean ones you outgrew?"
"No, no. I can and do still wear them".
WTF?!
But according to her, I'm not fat and should never change because I'm 'just right'. Just right to make her feel like a teeny tiny woman next to a big, fat behometh is what she means!0 -
You will find that most people that aren't aware of fitness/nutrition have no idea wtf they are talking about. So their comments are as valuable as a dump you took this morning.
Also since most of America is overweight, you have an entire segment of the population thinking being unhealthy is normal. Stupid0 -
I decided that I'm just not going to tell anyone about my intentions in terms of eating right and working out. People know I do it, but they don't need to know every detail or everytime I lose 2 more pounds. It opens the door for negative comments. Screw them and their jealously, it's not worth it.0
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I decided that I'm just not going to tell anyone about my intentions in terms of eating right and working out. People know I do it, but they don't need to know every detail or everytime I lose 2 more pounds. It opens the door for negative comments. Screw them and their jealously, it's not worth it.
Right. Sometimes if you talk about your diet, you invite unwanted comments. I tend to shut up about it too unless someone asks. Results speak plenty for me w/o speaking. :blushing:0 -
Yes I was told that, I was also told you are never the same weight you were in high school or college.. Truth is I guess they were right! I weigh less and I am in better shape 0
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@Scropioangel - Damn woman you look good! You are an inspiration to me.
Anyways, so I think we can conclude that haters will hate. thus we will just have to ignore and press forward. And I'm pretty sure that sometimes people were just trying to be kind. But I think the vast majority of them were like, "**** now she's no longer the chubby girl".0 -
I decided that I'm just not going to tell anyone about my intentions in terms of eating right and working out. People know I do it, but they don't need to know every detail or everytime I lose 2 more pounds. It opens the door for negative comments. Screw them and their jealously, it's not worth it.
Right. Sometimes if you talk about your diet, you invite unwanted comments. I tend to shut up about it too unless someone asks. Results speak plenty for me w/o speaking. :blushing:
Exactly! It took me a while but I figured out who supports me in the most positive manner, and I discuss my journey only with them! All the others that make comments can just watch me get in better shape.0 -
I've been told that I'll always be a "big dude" or that I'll never get rid of my gut. but I'm going to do it anyways, and ya I have friends that get messed with because they say they are too small. but when you see them at the pool it's obvious that they are toned, not skinny0
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There is the concept of body types, which I don't think the BMI takes into account. I'm a big guy, and I'm just beginning my journey, and I know I have a lot to loose. However, I'm 6'3, broad shouldered and my BMI is supposed to be between 148 and 200. I think I would look really weird and awkward if I was ever down to that weight, so I don't think I should do that.
But who knows, It would be nice to try that on for size at least once in my life!0 -
I hear that mess all the time. "Once you get rid of 5 or 6 more lbs. of that belly then you're going to stop right?" Um, no.... 5 or 6 more lbs. and I'll still be OBESE. I mean jeeeeeeeeeeeeez. Ok, so maybe I carry my weight well. Perhaps I look tons better than I used to, but I honestly, seriously and most determinedededly will lost 150+ lbs. Even at that, I won't be considered a 'healthy' weight range. I weigh a whole whole lot more than people realize and they want me to stop too. Not - gunna- do -it!
Drink your water people lol 0 -
I think a big part of it is that people hate change. Some of your friends have known you for 5, 10, or even 20 years. And if you've always been a bigger person, they are used to you that way. But now, you're changing and they don't know how to handle it.0
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I've been told by my always thinner sister that I don't need to lose anymore weight, and I'd look better if I actually put on 5 more pounds. She always tells me that I'm too skinny now, always cracking comments about how I don't eat, or about the way that I eat. I feel as though I can never exercise when I'm around her or eat the way I want, because she tells me to stop being ridiculous and anorexic. I'm hardly anorexic. I eat way more than her--my foods are just healthier and my diet is more balanced, and I work out more so I can eat a lot more. I do seem to have a body type where I'll always have a bit of a tummy or extra around the midsection, but hey, at least I know I tried and that I'm living a healthy lifestyle. If that's where my body says I need to be, I'm not going to force it otherwise to get some ideal look.0
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By a friend? never By others .... dont remember, so I probably only heard blah, blah, blah :laugh:0
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i had a friends who use to say i did not need to lose 30 more pounds i went from 250 to 170 and 140 was goal which was at the top of my weight range for healthy bmi. come to find out she ended up being the friend to tell me later she hated going out with me because she was not getting hit on by any guys other then ones who were hitting on both of us (just wanted in anyone's pants lol) then proceeded to say you get hit on by the creeps too but the good guys who want to be your bf as well. i was shocked seeing as i was the fat friend before so it was pure jealousy. plus the fact it was a big change for her plus i had tons of confidence ... She got over it fast and learned it was her own insecurities but still pissed me off at the time lol but she is still a friend and she actually is totally diff now and helps instead of feeling sorry for herself lol
then other people would say u look fine the way u r dont starve yourself when i wasnt i liked my salads when i went out lol and i was still 30 pounds over weight so made no sense to me lol0 -
I can say I have been in both boats on this one. However, NEVER insulted anyone out loud about being too skinny. I would naturally say in my head "Ugh look at that skinny chic." Which was usually followed by "Ya I wish I could be her size." However have been told by friends or even ex's "You wouldn't look good that skinny" pointing to someone that would be like a 6 or a 7! WHAT? Listen Im not saying my goal would ever be smaller than that but why not a 7? It was hard hearing it! No support, no sincerity from friends. Til I came to this site and now I have more support than I realized was out there! I say Marilyn Monroe was a beautiful woman at a size 14, what happen to this world thinking size 2 is manditory!0
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