So you've reached your goal...how do you REALLY feel?

roguex_1979
roguex_1979 Posts: 247 Member
edited November 9 in Success Stories
I have been wondering if reaching my goal will be enough for me. Is there a chance I could still think I'm too fat or not feel very svelt when I look in the mirror? When I was in my teens, even though I was probably the healthiest of my other two friends (one was obese, the other very skinny) I still felt unattractive and...not FAT, per se, but I wished I was slimmer. Maybe now I'm grown up, my perception will have changed...I hope.

But how you do YOU feel now you've reached your goal? Are you having any difficulties converting from weight loss to maintenance? Are you disappointed at all (was the image of yourself inside your head not what you have achieved?)? Or are you happy and satisfied?

:smooched:

Replies

  • SeaChele77
    SeaChele77 Posts: 1,103 Member
    Funny that you posted this.... as I was just looking in the mirror today and not at all happy with what I saw! I've made it to my goal, I've been complimented by friends and co-workers and for about a week I was actually happy with where I got to and wanted to switch to maintenance. But here I am today feeling "blah" and thinking I need to work out and not eat a bite today. :frown:

    I have issues though - always have and probably always will, so while I was happy for a week or so I'm not sure if I will ever be truly happy with what I see in the mirror. :grumble:
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
    I think this may depend on a lot of factors such as age and starting weight, but personally I feel fabulous now that I've lost the weight. I'm 50 and only needed to lose 20 lbs to reach my goal (fitting into my skinny jeans). I've lost 27 and I'm trying to decide if I'm happy here or I should change things up to lose more.

    I am happy here because I'm healthy here (something you think about more at my age) and I like the way I look. But still ... maybe just a little more??
  • fionarama
    fionarama Posts: 788 Member
    I changed my goals and really gave myself higher standards. Where before it was good enough just to be slim, now I want the whole fitness package, lots of muscle etc. So now I don't weigh myself but I am still working out hard and controlling my diet. I think its important at some stage to forget about the losing weight thing though, as it can relaly take over your life. For me as a female once I was under 60 kgs I decided weight wise wasn't an issue, but you can always get fitter and stronger.
    Have to say in terms of how I feel, I am happy to finally get there, its definitely one less thing to worry about!
  • I think that depends on the person. I also have always had issues since I was overweight for the 26 years. Although I am at a healthy weight, I still feel fat sometimes. I know that I'm not, but what I see and what I feel are different things. It's weird, but I can kind of understand young girls and women with eating disorders not seeing that they are too thin.

    I do have days though when I feel good/healthy--and those are the days I can put on my clothes and feel good, or when I've really worked out hard and eaten well. It's more work to keep this up, but at least I know I'm healthy even if I don't always feel it.
  • MacMadame
    MacMadame Posts: 1,893 Member
    I go back and forth. I love how I look in clothes. I'm less happy with how I look naked (loose skin). But some days I'm even happy with that.
  • xrockinrobyn
    xrockinrobyn Posts: 95 Member
    I don't struggle to maintain my weight but it makes me feel guilty. My life is far more active and therefore I eat more and feel bad even though I'm not gaining weight. Sometimes I don't mind what I see, other times I still hate myself. I could probably do with dropping half a stone or so but I think at the moment with the way I feel about myself I need to just concentrate on eating well and staying active.
  • I'm so glad someone else posted this as I've been tossing the idea around for about a week now. I'm now past what my original goal weight was, and just not happy. Some have even said maybe I have a problem. I'm hoping that toning will satsify me, but I won't lie, I'm a little scared it won't. I actually had a bit of an anxiety attack over it this morning, it's not just my weight but my whole life recently, I seem to have gotten everything I've ever wanted (my children, my farm, my fiance, stay at home and lost the weight) but yet I'm just NOT happy. I worry that I'll lose 5 more lbs and be underweight but not see what others see. I felt like this when I was bigger to though, I always felt as if people saw me as bigger then I saw myself....

    I'm not sure how to solve this issue, I'm looking forward to reading others responses for sure!
  • UpEarly
    UpEarly Posts: 2,555 Member
    I reached my goal recently, but now that I'm here I think I'd like to go for another ten pounds.

    I'm taking a break from calorie deficit for a while and have MFP set to maintenance. I'll keep doing what I'm doing and see how I feel in a month or two.

    If I still want to lose more, then I'll go back to losing a half pound a week again.

    The last time I weighed this little I was 17 or 18 years old. My 40 year old body looks A LOT different - even though it's the same weight as it was in high school. LOL
  • I think I will benefit so much more when achieving a goal such as, be able to run a 10k or be able to do 20 REAL push-ups etc. Weight is just a number, but being able to work towards a real goal seems much more enjoyable to me.
  • EpiGaiaRepens
    EpiGaiaRepens Posts: 824 Member
    i'd reach a goal, then set a new one.

    I started at 174. My original goal was to get below 145. Then I made it to get to 135. Then I made it to get to 125. I'm currently 128 and already changed my goals again: now I want to get to 121 or 18% BF, whichever comes first (according to my math, 121 is what i should weight at 18% BF).

    But i'm also setting goals now for sculpting. I don't want to be 125 lbs of blah. I want to be 125 lbs of strength. I don't want to starve myself to be skinny and have to sit on the couch because i am not eating enough. I want to have a 6 pack, and be able to do awesome things like circus arts and rock climbing...and if that means I'd weight more than 121, I'm ok with that.

    So that's my answer: life is never finished. The journey is the destination. That doesn't mean I'm never happy- I'm not disappointed in myself, I'm just stoked that I can make change and so I decide what changes to make. Its like getting tattooed- I love every tattoo I get and when one is finished, I'm planning the next. My life is my masterpeice, my body is just one of my canvasses.
  • amyofftherecord
    amyofftherecord Posts: 64 Member
    I'm so glad someone else posted this as I've been tossing the idea around for about a week now. I'm now past what my original goal weight was, and just not happy. Some have even said maybe I have a problem. I'm hoping that toning will satsify me, but I won't lie, I'm a little scared it won't. I actually had a bit of an anxiety attack over it this morning, it's not just my weight but my whole life recently, I seem to have gotten everything I've ever wanted (my children, my farm, my fiance, stay at home and lost the weight) but yet I'm just NOT happy. I worry that I'll lose 5 more lbs and be underweight but not see what others see. I felt like this when I was bigger to though, I always felt as if people saw me as bigger then I saw myself....

    I'm not sure how to solve this issue, I'm looking forward to reading others responses for sure!

    I think that's what a lot of people go through because they wrap their happiness in "events" and "things" but never suss out what would actually make them happy. Like some people will lose weight in the hopes of feeling attractive, but the issue isn't their weight or even their looks but rather an insecurity that no amount of exterior change will correct. It can be hard, maybe even take years (and possibly therapy; it's not just for the crazies, you know :P ), but you've got to figure out what is actually making you unhappy -- not just the "things" that unhappiness has attached itself to -- and work on *that*.
  • vypeters
    vypeters Posts: 475 Member
    I feel great. Got lots of baggy skin, will never wear a bikini but I've gone from barely being able to walk to hiking 14+ miles last weekend. I look good (at least in clothes), I feel good, and I know I've achieved a lot.

    That said, my goal weight would probably be a starting weight for some of you. For me, it's a dream come true.
  • amruden
    amruden Posts: 228 Member
    We all are here working toward a better PHYSICAL health. We also need to work towards abetter MENTAL health.

    Even after one has lost a lot of weight it hard to see your self as a new person, the person in the mirror is a harsh critic.
  • TeeRaceFisher
    TeeRaceFisher Posts: 44 Member
    I hope I'll feel good.
    My desire to lose weight and change my lifestyle was more inspired by being healthier, not skinnier/prettier. I want to be able to run around with my kid without feeling winded, not fit into skinny jeans (though, that will be a nice perk, I'm sure!)

    I've always felt right in my body, attractive to those who matter, and I've always been big. I think how you feel about yourself is less about your physical health and more about your mental health. If you don't like you at 180, who is to say you'll suddenly like yourself at 160? It may help with self-esteem but it won't solve any bigger emotional problems you already have.
  • toolgirl626
    toolgirl626 Posts: 17 Member
    I have most always been too heavy, and have always heard negative things from so many people. It does play on your self esteem. I'm not sure I'm so elated over my weight loss as I see the loose skin, wrinkles on my arms and legs. I have to remember that I should be happy that I am much healthier now. With all the weight I've lost, my sister has never commented or was happy that I was getting healthy. She had a bypass and put the weight back on. I use her anger to keep me on track. Best of everything to you and I wish you good health.
  • swimmchick87
    swimmchick87 Posts: 458 Member
    I'm not at my GW currently, but I can draw on past experiences. I'm 5'4 and in HS I gained a few pounds and ended up being about 140, when I'd always been around 130 before. I started dieting and exercising and got down to 120 (size 2 since I was so toned) the summer before college. It was kind of 50/50 for me. On the one hand, I was elated. I loved the way I looked, knew I was skinny, and was so proud of what I'd done. I felt very comfortable with my body most of the time. However, there always were those moments where I'd think it wasn't quite good enough. I'd want a totally flat stomach even if I was bending over, or I'd think some tight fitting tube top looked great in black but I wasn't thin enough to wear it in red. There was a nagging thought sometimes that I'd look REALLY great if I could get down to 115. Of course I went to college and that all went to hell, haha...which is why I'm on here now! I know that I never went on "maintenance" though like people talk about on here. I counted calories informally and even when I reached 120 I kept the same number and basically maintained, not losing or gaining. I'm positive if I would have increased I would have gained. I gained when I quit counting.
  • I'm 10 lbs away from my new goal (I am at my original goal but still feel fat). I worry that I will get down to 120 and still feel fat. I am working out and feel great, if I could just get rid of the rolls that are my stomach, hips and thighs, I would be much happier. I agree that it is more in our heads though and I probably need to find a way to work on that too.
  • robinogue
    robinogue Posts: 1,117 Member
    I go back and forth. I love how I look in clothes. I'm less happy with how I look naked (loose skin). But some days I'm even happy with that.

    I feel the same way.. Some days are better than others.. Although I've reached my weight loss goal, I'm now focusing on toning up. My BMI % is great but I need to lower my BF %
  • yes update your goals! Pay close attention to your healthy weight range though so you stay within the healthy bracket. I was thinking the same thing just this morning.
  • Very interesting post & responses. Thanks all!
  • oh and instead of focusing on losing weight if you are at a healthy weight, try set a goal to become stronger. You'd be amazed how weights added to a routine can make significant changes on your body! Small changes like that can make a world of difference!
  • farmers_daughter
    farmers_daughter Posts: 1,632 Member
    I think that's what a lot of people go through because they wrap their happiness in "events" and "things" but never suss out what would actually make them happy. Like some people will lose weight in the hopes of feeling attractive, but the issue isn't their weight or even their looks but rather an insecurity that no amount of exterior change will correct. It can be hard, maybe even take years (and possibly therapy; it's not just for the crazies, you know :P ), but you've got to figure out what is actually making you unhappy -- not just the "things" that unhappiness has attached itself to -- and work on *that*.

    I've struggled for decades with my weight....that's sad.... with my weight, and after my divorce I started going through therapy (PS - super glad someone else doesn't think it's for the crazies) and found that my weight struggles are more of a mental game, than a physical one.

    The physical aspect is only a small portion.
  • CDresp
    CDresp Posts: 201 Member
    Fat or thin it really doesn't matter if you have a hole in the bottom of your soul bucket. No matter what you use; food, drugs, exercise, shopping, alcohol, (fill in your issue), etc. it will not fill the bucket to make you a whole person. First you have to realize and KNOW you are loved and worthy of love. That is step one. And, dare I say it in this PC out-of-control world, look to God for the unconditional love you are seeking to patch the whole and fill the bucket. THEN you will begin to see how beautiful you are both inside and out. Remember, each person born in this world is in fact a miracle.....even you. I hope this does not offend anyone, but you know what they say...the truth will set you free, but first will tick you right off. Blessings.
  • LuckyLeprechaun
    LuckyLeprechaun Posts: 6,296 Member
    I feel fricking amazing. I have 1 lb left to go, and while I see the repercissions of having become obese (stretch marks are going to always be there), I also see the size tag in my new clohes and I feel awesome. I walk taller, I interact with people more confidently, and I love what I have accomplished for my health.
  • shedoos
    shedoos Posts: 446 Member
    I still look in the mirror and see fat girl. I feel great, but its been so long since I've been happy with my body, that I don't know how to be happy with my body...
  • fionarama
    fionarama Posts: 788 Member
    I think Point 5 of the following needs to be taken in to account. yes, losing weight and reaching your body goal may make you happier. But at the end of the day, you need to Choose to Be Happy. If you're not int he habit of doing this, I think any amount of weight loss will not cure your unhappiness.

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2012/feb/01/top-five-regrets-of-the-dying
  • jmruef
    jmruef Posts: 824 Member
    I'm happy with the way I look...for the most part. I struggled for far too long with body image issues to be completely comfortable wtih myself YET, but I'm working on it. I know that I'm at a healthy, sustainable weight, my clothes look good on me, and I'm not depriving myself or feeling hungry all day.

    I *would* like to be more fit. Not skinnier, just stronger and healthier. My body will change shape even if the numbers don't move, and that's really fine with me.
  • DowntimeDesigns
    DowntimeDesigns Posts: 134 Member
    Honestly it depends on the day. Some days I feel energized and looking good and ready to take on the world. Other days it feels like that old fat kid is just staring at me in the mirror when I wake up.

    The good days are better than the old good days, but the bad days aren't any worse! So all in all, it feels okay, lol.
This discussion has been closed.
Do you Love MyFitnessPal? Have you crushed a goal or improved your life through better nutrition using MyFitnessPal?
Share your success and inspire others. Leave us a review on Apple Or Google Play stores!