Frustrated and starting to cheat!

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Okay, so I'm not perfect - I don't eat exactly what I should all the time... but I am pretty good at being honest and logging my calories.

I'm a healthy woman, I don't drink (except socially), I don't smoke, and generally choose healthy foods (fresh foods, organic foods, low fat/low calorie). My thyroid is fine according to my doctor.

I got back into MFP a few weeks ago, with a decision to focus on calorie count only, and to add exercise in later (after the stress of the holidays and our planned move to a new town simmer down).

And there definitely has been a lot of stress lately - I am a mom of three and just moved our entire household to a new town (closer to work and shorter commute - Yay!). We're getting our old house ready to rent, and I recently fell ill with that nasty virus that's been dropping my coworkers like flies (Yuk). Sooo..... I made some bad eating choices during the move and when I was sick (although tried not to get too crazy) like having nutter butters for breakfast one morning, and getting fries instead of fruit with my grilled chicken sandwich from Chik Fil A (yes, lots of takeout eating during the move... had to figure out where my pots and pans were!!! lol). Indiscretions? Yes. Binge eating? No.

Anyhoo... my question is this: if I am eating around what my "maintenance" calories should be, why am I gaining weight? And when I'm being really good about only eating my reduced calories, why am I not losing?

I've focused on reducing sodium and increasing water intake, thinking that swelling may be a factor, also. (And no, my "special" time of the month is not here either)

Technically, shouldn't I lose weight, even if I'm not exercising, as long as I am only consuming my reduced calories?

When the scale stops moving, and then starts moving in the wrong direction, I get very demotivated. To the point that I start thinking "Cheesecake? why certainly!"

I am getting very demotivated, this is exactly why I stopped MFP several months ago... all this hard work, logging, tracking, weighing my food, checking labels - for what?? Just to lose a few pounds, then gain them back and possibly head higher than I was when I started. Last time I was faithfully on MFP I was exercising regularly also - I had tried eating my exercise calories and when the weight piled on, I quit.

Any suggestions on how to "tweak" what I am doing? Is there some magic combination I haven't tried?

I appreciate any motivation/ideas you can offer!
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Replies

  • PinkEarthMama
    PinkEarthMama Posts: 987 Member
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    You aren't eating enough fruit and vegetables. You said " Fresh Food " but I'm seeing a lot of Cheesecake factory. Each bite of cheesecake counts!!!


    Admittedly, i only went back 4 days or so. But I find that I'm more willing to cheat if I'm hungry. If I am hungry, its because I didn't eat enough. If I didn't eat enough, I can assure you... I ate the crap food first because it was easy, and skipped out on the veggies.
  • thepetiterunner
    thepetiterunner Posts: 1,238 Member
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    Everyone's body is a bit different and everyone responds to changes in diet/exercise routines in a different way. Having said that, I've never tried losing weight/getting fit soley based on changes in diet.

    I would say that exercising would help. I know you said last time you were eating your calories back and the weight went up. A couple of questions regarding that: 1) were you using a HRM to calculate calories or going off of machines/estimates on MFP or other sites? 2) how often/what types of exercises were you doing?

    I'm not one who fully believes in the "eat all your calories from exercise back". I lost 25 lbs from always keeping a deficiet in calories every day and have kept it off for over 1.5 years. It may work for some, but not always. Also, muscle does weigh more than fat, so if you were doing weight lifting and putting on muscle, that may account for your increase in weight.

    Also, are you taking measurements? It seems you only talk about the numbers on the scale not moving. While seeing the scale tip lower and lower is certainly encouraging and motivating, it cannot be the only method you use to decide whether you are being successful or not.

    There's no magic combination that I've discovered. I will say that doing both exercise (cardio & weight lifting) and eating clean foods has done a lot to get me towards my own fitness goals, but I know everyone is different.

    I wish you the best of luck!
  • lodro
    lodro Posts: 982 Member
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    it's simple, imo. if you eat at maintenance, and you're gaining, you're eating too much, probably my eyeballing portions and underestimating your caloric intake. solution: eat less.
  • jac2lyn
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    I fully understand your frustration. It really depends on what foods you are eating. You can eat within your calories but if you eat out alot and do not consume alot fo fruits and veggies you are bound to gain weight. Make sure you incorporate things like healthy fruits and veggies, yogurt, protiens and try to pack lunches that you know are healthy instead of eating out. Also, consume water. That makes allll the difference. I am trying to lose my last 10 pounds and it has been so hard. I also have moments of oh well I might as well eat the icecream since my weight isnt moving, but then I remember that I worked so hard during the day and mostly I do feel and look better then a couple months ago.

    Good luck, hope it gets easier:smile:
  • kvultaggio
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    That's a good point, I often find myself wondering how to fit in more fruits and veggies...typically my kids eat the fruit out of the house before I can get to it, lol. Maybe if I'm munching on fresh veggies more often, I won't feel so hungry.
  • kvultaggio
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    it's simple, imo. if you eat at maintenance, and you're gaining, you're eating too much, probably my eyeballing portions and underestimating your caloric intake. solution: eat less.

    I am actually very stringent about measuring the foods I eat. I don't eyeball portions, I actually measure!
  • kvultaggio
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    I fully understand your frustration. It really depends on what foods you are eating. You can eat within your calories but if you eat out alot and do not consume alot fo fruits and veggies you are bound to gain weight. Make sure you incorporate things like healthy fruits and veggies, yogurt, protiens and try to pack lunches that you know are healthy instead of eating out. Also, consume water. That makes allll the difference. I am trying to lose my last 10 pounds and it has been so hard. I also have moments of oh well I might as well eat the icecream since my weight isnt moving, but then I remember that I worked so hard during the day and mostly I do feel and look better then a couple months ago.

    Good luck, hope it gets easier:smile:

    Thanks :-) that is exactly how I feel, and you're right, I should remind myself of how hard I'm working and to back off from the temptations. :-)
  • Thelala
    Thelala Posts: 47 Member
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    It sounds like you have some life changes that may be a little stressful. Don't give up. It's pretty normal for us to have plateaus along the way. Be more stubborn than your scale. You will get there.
  • auticus
    auticus Posts: 1,051 Member
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    I don't mean this to sound harsh or offensive.

    That being said:

    You either have the willpower and motivation to succeed, or you have excuses and reasons why you can't succeed.

    One road is a lot harder than the other.

    Which one do you want to walk on?
  • jennalink807
    jennalink807 Posts: 226 Member
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    YOU CAN DO IT!!!

    Seriously though, just keep with it. I've been on since October, and so many times I felt like I was gaining weight (turned out to be bloating from my poorer food choices) or not moving at all (plateued for 6 weeks).

    Now, looking back I realize that 7lbs in 4 months is not bad! It can be hard to see the road ahead when you're stuck, but trust me- stick with it and the WEIGHT WILL COME OFF... eventually. Maybe even slowely, but it will.

    For me, lifting heavy and upping my cals was actually what brought me off my plateau. Best of luck to you!
  • jlr_12
    jlr_12 Posts: 170 Member
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    Is your diary accurate? Are you really only eating up until 3:30 in the afternoon (how on earth do you not starve all night)? On many of the days that I looked at (only the past week) a LARGE portion of your calories came from cookies and the like. Try replacing some of those snacks with healthier options like veggies and fruit, or lean protein. A cookie or 2 a day is fine, but it shouldn't make up 1/3rd of your daily calories...

    From what I saw you eat a lot of processed food...fast food is processed food in most cases. I understand that life is stressful right now..which is a problem in and of itself when losing weight...but you really need to take a hard look at what you're eating and be honest with yourself about it. There is a lot of areas that you could make improvements on. Like you said, lowering sodium...lowering sugar. On the days where you're eating at maintenance, the only reason your cals get that high is due to sweets or fast food.

    Now for the stress....have you tried yoga or deep breathing exercises at all? Go on youtube and look up relaxation exercises and do a couple..it'll do wonders for you! Stress is a huge obstacle when it comes to weight loss (physically and emotionally), so getting that in check is important as you continue on. Every day is a new day...and a new opportunity to make the right decisions. Don't reflect on the troubles you've had losing in the past, and just think about what small changes you can make every day to have success in the future.
  • myfourcats
    myfourcats Posts: 13 Member
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    Don't give up!!! I just like you, have gotten motivated and then gained, back and fourth back and fourth, stress does play a part in your weight!!! Now that everything is settling down for you and life is not as stressful, try to make sure that you put in veggies and fruits, that is the one thing that I was not doing looking back at my food intake. I exercise 3 times a week walking, and zumba, prob. gained a little because I was gaining muscle.

    I am sure that your portions are in control just check your fruit and veggies intake. Sometimes when I am makiing dinner, I will grab the chips and say a few wont be bad, now I am not grabbing and if I do it celery or carrots sticks, also drinking water helps especially when you are hungry.

    Please dont give up, you are worth it!!! good luck:happy:
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
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    Stress is a factor is weight loss/gain. Try some stress reducing exercises or techniques and stay strong till things calm down again.
  • slayerdan
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    it's simple, imo. if you eat at maintenance, and you're gaining, you're eating too much, probably my eyeballing portions and underestimating your caloric intake. solution: eat less.

    This.
  • siciliankiss
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    That's a good point, I often find myself wondering how to fit in more fruits and veggies...typically my kids eat the fruit out of the house before I can get to it, lol. Maybe if I'm munching on fresh veggies more often, I won't feel so hungry.

    Just wondering, what is your carb intake like?
    I find the more carbs I eat, the hungrier I am but when I load up on meats (like chicken) and veggies (even beans), I'm less hungry.
    I wouldn't say cut out carbs completely because when you do start eating them again, you'll just gain weight. But definitely reduce them if you eat carbs with every meal.

    For snacks, have fresh fruit and veggies readily available and easy for you to grab.Wash and pre-cut your veggies/fruits so that you won't feel "lazy" when it comes time to eat them.

    Portion control is everything, too. But you've already said you're pretty anal about measuring food.

    Even though it's easily accessible, stay away from fast food and just prepare meals you can warm up for lunch or when you're on the go. Make enough soup for a few days, and freeze the left overs.

    I hope this helps!
  • kvultaggio
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    YOU CAN DO IT!!!

    Seriously though, just keep with it. I've been on since October, and so many times I felt like I was gaining weight (turned out to be bloating from my poorer food choices) or not moving at all (plateued for 6 weeks).

    Now, looking back I realize that 7lbs in 4 months is not bad! It can be hard to see the road ahead when you're stuck, but trust me- stick with it and the WEIGHT WILL COME OFF... eventually. Maybe even slowely, but it will.

    For me, lifting heavy and upping my cals was actually what brought me off my plateau. Best of luck to you!

    Thanks :smile: I keep trying to remind myself "slow and steady wins the race'

    I wonder if too many "sugar free" items with Splenda is goofing me up? I noticed I get kinda gassy/bloaty when I have it....?
  • Espressocycle
    Espressocycle Posts: 2,245 Member
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    Your height, weight, sex and age will generate an estimate of the needs of the average person sharing your states, but nobody is an average person. Chances are you just need to lower your calorie goal.
  • NaomiLyn15
    NaomiLyn15 Posts: 388 Member
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    The weight loss journey is definitely frustrating. But, keep in mind that your body isn't going to change overnight. You said you have been doing this for a few weeks? That is not long enough. Try to be really honest with what you are eating for another 3 weeks. Measure your food, weigh it, do whatever you can to ensure that you are staying within your calorie goal. If nothing has changed in a few weeks, see your doctor again. When I first started to lose weight it took me a good 5 weeks to lose anything, once I started then I kept going. Don't give up yet.
  • kvultaggio
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    That's a good point, I often find myself wondering how to fit in more fruits and veggies...typically my kids eat the fruit out of the house before I can get to it, lol. Maybe if I'm munching on fresh veggies more often, I won't feel so hungry.

    Just wondering, what is your carb intake like?
    I find the more carbs I eat, the hungrier I am but when I load up on meats (like chicken) and veggies (even beans), I'm less hungry.
    I wouldn't say cut out carbs completely because when you do start eating them again, you'll just gain weight. But definitely reduce them if you eat carbs with every meal.

    For snacks, have fresh fruit and veggies readily available and easy for you to grab.Wash and pre-cut your veggies/fruits so that you won't feel "lazy" when it comes time to eat them.

    Portion control is everything, too. But you've already said you're pretty anal about measuring food.

    Even though it's easily accessible, stay away from fast food and just prepare meals you can warm up for lunch or when you're on the go. Make enough soup for a few days, and freeze the left overs.

    I hope this helps!

    I don't try to go low-carb, but I do try to eat plenty of good protein (like egg whites, lean meat, etc). One thing folks are commenting on is my "move and being sick" phase - the last 2 weeks have been bad as far as eating, and not reflective of my normal habits. I also just recently switched my days to 6 small portions, so on the days where I look like I'm only eating at 3:30, that's not true - that was where "Dinner" used to be (instead of 3:30).
  • gracielee1
    gracielee1 Posts: 71 Member
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    You have a lot of major life events i.e. moving and relocating your family and the flu, which increases your stress and has you reverting to old eating patterns. Trust me, we all go through this, and no ones perfect and you have to stop flogging yourself because you'll only keep reaching for the fries at chik fil A to ease your anxiety. With that being said, it's hard for your body to process and digest foods that are scarfed down or battered in hydrogenated oils or eaten while on the go or running to your next appointment or while driving. If you don't exercise as much any more or you're not eating as organically as you like, at least do this: log what you eat. Also eat more when you really do need the energy i.e. high noon. That's also when your body can metabolize food better so you'll be flushing out the food or converting it to needed energy more efficiently. At my absolute worst (with the flu, stress from a new job, moving back to the suburbs, not going to the gym), I was eating as much and wholesome foods during lunch than any other time of day, and this helped keep my weight and energy in check. Try it out... I've never been a mother or had to experience relocating my family and three kids, so I cant empathize with your stress, but if you eat the most of your food consistently in the earlier part of the day, you'll feel a lot more energy and burn more calories throughout the day.